Much Ado About Nada

Text messages between Badia and Ben, part 1:

Ben: everyone keeps looking at me.

Badia: Wipe your nose then.

Ben: nah it’s the people. they’re just too friendly. why did we come here again?? destination weddings are such a scam.

Badia: Yeah right. You’re so totally hating this trip. That’s why you went to Taormina yesterday to see where The White Lotus was filmed.

Ben: where did you hear that?

Badia: Pedro told us. ;)

Ben: Traitor.

Badia: Haha..Well I’m getting ready for the bachelorette party. Nada said "casual but classy" so we shall see. Cya. x

Ben: x???

Badia: …

Later that evening

“Say cheese habibi!” Nada flashed a relaxed smile as Badia snapped the pic and posted it to Insta stories. It was surreal to be on the yacht that beautiful, Italian evening in Sicily with the lights starting to flicker behind them and the green hills in the distance. 

“And when is it your turn?” Nada raised a glass to her cousin.

“Yani, I would rather hear my dog bark at a crow than a man swear he loves me,” Badia replied. Nada and her few friends looked at her quizzically but then tossed their heads back and laughed. “But, if I had the same story you and Carlos have, who knows, maybe I wouldn’t be opposed to it.” Cynical Nada was definitely a few drinks in; she didn’t normally talk like this.

A friend asked Nada to tell the story of how she and Carlos met, even though they all already heard the story about fifty times. She gladly did of course, as it was the night before their dream wedding and she was feeling nostalgic. She retold the story of how it all started on her first day at LMU and she couldn’t find her class; how Carlos happened to be standing nearby and helped her, how they realized they were in the same class so they sat together. How it was so boring and Carlos kept whispering insults about the class to her in Spanish, low enough the professor wouldn’t hear. How she stifled her giggles even though she really didn’t understand what he was saying because she didn’t know very good Spanish, her parents were originally from Lebanon and she spoke Arabic at home. How after class he asked her for a coffee in Spanish and she told him she didn’t understand him. How he switched to English and apologized and asked about her ethnicity since she looked like him and other girls he had dated, how she explained where her parents actually came from and how it was ok, she got that all the time living in LA. How he smiled and wouldn’t stop smiling and took her to Cafe Ruisseau and how they became friends, how they fell in love, went to school for four years together and how they’ve been together ever since. What she didn’t include was how her father Leo has always been a big fan of Carlos and welcomed him into their home early on; how he had always approved of them dating. How he was rich enough to spend a fortune on this destination wedding for his only daughter.

Badia interrupted her cousin, “And now we’re here in Messina for your wedding, we know, we know, let’s enjoy your last night of being single, yallah.” All her friends laughed, raised a glass and enjoyed the breathtaking sunset. 

Text messages between Badia and Ben, part 2:

Badia: Ugh, she just told the story of how they met. Again. 

Ben: jealous much?

Badia: …

Ben: drunk much?

Badia: lol Flattered much?

Ben: against my will 

*

The minute they were back on land Badia ran to the bathroom and as she did she handed her phone to Nada for safe keeping (unlike her, but she was a little tipsy after all). While she was gone Nada noticed an incoming text message from none other than Ben. She smiled and said to her friends, “Y’all Badia is so stubborn but she and Ben are so meant for each other.” Her college roommate Andrea said, “Oh my god, I KNOW! They’re always flirting but then deny it. Let’s help them!” They drunkenly and quickly whispered a plan.

Just as Badia was returning, she overheard her cousin gossiping with her friends about Ben. She hid behind a pillar to eavesdrop.

“You know, I heard Ben was looking at Badia yesterday at the rehearsal dinner,” Andrea lied convincingly.

“Right? I saw that, too. He’s been secretly in love with her for years, but he’s just so shy about it,” Nada added. At this, Badia’s hand flew over her mouth.

“I heard he was asking around if she was still single,” another friend chimed in. 

“Good, finally! They both deserve to be happy,” Nada said in earnest.

Badia was confused but flattered. Ben? Oh, Ben. She wondered what it was about her that intrigued him. Smiling, she sauntered back into the party.

Meanwhile at the Bachelor party, Carlos and his group of friends were taking another round of shots. As the warm night in magical Messina wore on, they had found themselves in a popular nightclub near the beach. With the beats pulsating, the guys threw their shots down, howling with laughter in their VIP booth. Nada’s betrothed, Carlos, was drunk.

Everyone was having a good time except for Juan. Invited simply as a courtesy to Pedro and since they’d all known each other for years, nobody had expected him to actually come and were surprised when he did. Some of the attendees even had an ongoing bet about it. Juan was extra irritable that night at the bachelor party, scoffing at the intoxicated group. And a bitter Juan had no qualms with ruining everything for the couple. When he finally caught his gullible friend Burak making out with a girl in the corner, the exact one who he had been a wingman for (“She’s checking you out, amigo,” he had said earlier), he knew this was his only chance. It was a perfect trap; she looked similar enough to Nada it should work.

He quickly and discreetly filmed them with his phone, being sure not to show either of their faces. He strategically waited a few minutes then posted it to his Insta stories, mentioning both her and Carlos. He commented “DTB” and an angry face emoji. Share.

When Carlos got the notification and checked his phone, his face went white. 

“Que es??” he whispered in disbelief. His friends also checked their phones, gasping, while Juan took a secret delight in seeing Carlos in agony. 

“‘Ojos que no ven, corazón que no siente,’ Pedro calmly said to him.

“Que?” Carlos asked. He couldn’t focus. He felt like he was about to vomit. The music was dying down. Conveniently they didn’t have to shout.

“Out of sight, out of mind. This is not your Nada. It can’t be. No, es nada.”

“Wait you just said it wasn’t her,” Carlos mumbled, confused, drunk.

“No, I mean, it is nothing! How typical her name is Nada,” Pedro laughed. “What does her name mean in Arabic again, was it dew or flowers or something?” Carlos nodded sadly, swaying, as if he was about to fall over.

Pedro grabbed him by the shoulders and stared at him intently, “Out of sight, out of mind, mi amigo. What is not seen with our own eyes, cannot harm our heart.”

Juan scoffed. “Bro, how the hell does that help him? He did see. So too late.” He pushed Pedro off of Carlos and disingenuously put his arm around him. “What do you need, C?”

“I need…I need to call her,” Carlos was snapped out of his shock and began thumbing through his phone to call her.

She didn’t answer.

In his confused and drunken haze, Carlos suddenly felt a rage he had never felt before; it was buried deep in generational trauma he forgot he even had. As soon as her voicemail hit, he let her have it.

Drunk Text Messages between Badia and Benjamin:

Badia: For which of my good parts did you first suffer love for me?

Ben: Que????

1 hour later

Badia: Yo where is carlos?

Ben: good question. 

Badia: He was out of pocket with Nada. I will light his ass on fire.

Ben: what?? where are you? meet me in the hotel garden, my phone is about to die.

10 minutes later

It didn’t take long after Badia had marched over to Ben for her to cool off. She wasn’t mad at him specifically, just men. They sat on a bench in the moonlight seeing Mount Etna on the horizon, the volcano soaring into the sky. It would’ve been romantic under different circumstances but both were still jet lagged and perpetually cynical. They’d known each other for ages, had a ton of mutual friends, but always poked fun at each other for some reason. Their friends always laughed and said they enjoyed listening to their banter, and would they just go out already. But they were both intent on staying single. For whatever reason Badia always had her guard up. So did Ben.

“Ok, I’m tired, what do you want now?” Badia yawned.

“Me? You’re the one who was asking about Carlos. But I heard some of the guys saying Nada made a scene earlier, too,” Ben replied.

“What are you talking about?” 

“Here, Juan posted this.” Ben went to show Badia his phone but then it died.

“Shit,” he said.

“I didn’t see anything! Ugh, what are y’all even talking about? Something on insta? I won't be able to see it, he blocked me a few months ago.” She rolled her eyes.

“Apparently Nada was kissing someone earlier. You were with her, right? What exactly happened?”

This new information woke Badia up instantly. “HAHA! WHAT?? Nada?! She’s a goody goody! I’ve never even seen her kiss Carlos. You know how old fashioned they are. She wasn’t even drunk tonight. She was the one who wanted to end the party early. She had already fallen asleep when he called her. I’m the one who opened her phone and listened to his voicemail. Could barely understand the fool but heard him well enough to want to slap him. I just left her room. Where is HE??”

“Easy, easy. I don’t know. Probably also passed out. I guess they’ll clear it up tomorrow,” he sighed.

“They? You mean Leo,” Badia corrected him. “Leo will fix this. Period.” 

“And what was YOUR text about earlier?” he inquired. “About the ‘good parts’?”

“You tell me. You were the one asking about me.”

Ben blushed. He was planning to ask about her but hadn’t yet. Gossip abounds and rumors swirl here at the villa, he thought. Just like back in LA.

“I -” he began. “I’m going to bed; it’s late and I need to charge my phone.”

“Typical Ben,” Badia rolled her eyes.

“Typical Ben? What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Always running away. You talk a big game but you’re all bark and no bite.”

He was walking in circles at this point and every time he started to say something, he’d stop, raise a finger, open his mouth and then close it again, and repeat.

Frustrated with his indecisiveness, Badia stood up to him, crossed her arms and confessed, “I’m done with the games. What do you want?”

He stopped pacing and just stared at her. He started breathing very heavily and suddenly she was, too. With each breath they moved a step closer to one another. Only inches away and eyes locked, the tension was the most intense it ever had been between them. He impulsively grabbed her face and they kissed. After a moment she pulled away, made a face, and then finally said, "Screw it," grabbing him and kissing him back. They continued, messy arms grabbing and pulling, holding tight and coming up to catch their breath every ten seconds. Finally they released most of each other but still held arms, to keep from falling, and began laughing.

*

The next morning Carlos woke up on the bathroom floor. The last thing he remembered was seeing Nada kissing someone. But was it really her? Everything after that was a blur. Realizing he had blacked out, he reached for the toilet and threw up. Then he washed his face, and crawled to the bed for her, forgetting their arrangement. Of course Nada wasn’t there. They had decided not to share a room together in Villa Pulejo, their hotel in Messina. Even though their families were liberal they wanted to respect everyone who had come on the trip. Plus they thought not being together too much before the big day would add to the excitement. In hindsight, he wished they hadn’t done that. He downed some water, then grabbed his things and stumbled out the door. 

When Carlos arrived at their hotel suite to talk to Nada, Badia wouldn’t let him in.

“Badia, please, I need to see her,” Carlos begged, out of breath from running down the hall.

“She’s dead,” Badia said, stone cold. “To you, anyway.”

“What? No, please, I don’t even remember half of last night,” Carlos shook his head.

“Oh, you don’t remember? How convenient.” She shut the door on him.

He continued knocking.

“Please, Nada, are you in there? Por favor, let me in, I’m so sorry,” he cried.

Finally after a minute the dead bolt was unlatched and the door opened.

“Yalla yalla,” Nada said, gesturing towards the room, barely looking at him.

Carlos crawled inside and held her legs, sobbing. He was passionate and pathetic.

“Please Nada, they tricked me, I know you’d never do that,” he explained. “It was Juan, he started it all.”

She shook her head, taking a deep breath. “Go tell my father.”

Leo summoned Carlos in with his deep voice. Carlos stood up, brushed off his pant legs, and slowly walked further into the royal suite.

“Sir,” Carlos began, his voice shaking.

“No,” Leo stopped him. “I heard about your tasteful voicemail. “Deshonra. 'ant wasmat ear.”

Over their years together, Carlos had made an effort to learn more Arabic for her, and Nada had improved her Spanish for him. He understood the old man’s harsh words and said his next words with conviction. “I know I’m a disgrace. I’m sorry from the bottom of my heart. I love your Nada and I would never mean to hurt her. Please believe me. It was all a stupid mistake.”

Leo squinted his face as he listened to the apology. He didn’t say anything for a minute. He looked at Nada. She nodded at him, with tired, wanting eyes, desperate to keep Carlos despite this blunder.

“Tamaam, ok, ok,” Leo finally broke the silence. “Did you know that Messina is originally Arabic? It means ‘middle’. And it seems like someone got in the middle of your business. I can guess what has happened here. And it’s not entirely your fault.” He looked at Nada for a moment in respect and then back at Carlos.

“Even though I have paid for everything you see here, I know ultimately this decision is not up to me, boy. My daughter wants what she wants. Everyone will know that Nada is innocent, and thankfully the only ones who know about your little voicemail are the people in this suite. We will forget this, do you hear me? But if you ever, ever dare to speak this way about my sweet Nada or in any way embarrass her again, you are done.” Carlos instinctively bowed to Leo, nodding his head. “Yes, sir.”

Leo went on. “Good. Now my brother Anthony and I didn’t fly all of you halfway across the world for my only daughter to have a drama filled wedding. You will both be married in peace today, Inshallah.”

Carlos dramatically nodded in agreement again and Nada finally ran over to his side. They hugged and Carlos whispered ‘Lo siento, I’m sorry’ in her ear. She took a step back. “Please,” she interrupted him. “It’s done. It’s dead. We move on now.” They smiled, squeezed hands, and breathed a sigh of relief. The wedding was still on.

GROUP CHAT 

Nada: Good morning y’all! It’s sunshiney & a good day to get married in Sicily! You may or may not have already heard about the prank. Long story short, sorry for all the unnecessary drama before our big day. Please know everything IS on schedule for today and everything is just fabulous! See you soon! xx

Juan has left the group chat.



Ben: Bye Felipe! Good riddance.

Badia: 😂

Carlos: 100%. Yes, yes, everything is definitely ON for today. See you at 12, vamos!

Ben: I will stop your mouth.

Badia: Ben, please, it’s enough, habibi. 

Ben: Indeed.

Carlos: Wait what did I miss???

Nada: Looks like we're not the only couple leaving Italy together. "Love goes by haps; some cupids kills with arrows, some with traps." ;)