Sirius

It’s late in the park tonight, only a few individuals left meandering through the concrete pathways. The night is cold and peaceful, and Lulu is most calm on their evening walks at this time. Sky is used to it by now, almost prefers it.

Well, usually.

Tonight, she barks loudly and sprints forward, enough force to pull her leash out of his hands. He stumbles as she runs away. She always stays by his side whenever they walk, so he hesitates for one, two seconds before chasing after her.

“Lulu!” He calls as she races into the grass field.

There is a stranger sprawled out on the grass and staring up at the sky. The tips of his hair are icy white, and there is a reflection of the moonlight in his irises. Lulu continues to bark until she is close enough to start licking at his face. The stranger doesn’t seem bothered, smiling and petting her gently as she snuggles into his chest.

“I’m so sorry,” he says as he picks her up. She twists and turns in his arms and continues to bark in the stranger’s direction. “She’s usually not like this, I don’t know what’s gotten into her.”

The stranger sits up and smiles, “No worries. I love Samoyeds.”

Lulu shakes and squirms in Sky’s arms. “Um…did she interrupt something?”

He stands from his place and dusts the dirt off of his pants. He sends a grateful smile to the view above them before shaking his head. “Stargazing. I can usually see them best from here, but not tonight, I guess.”

Stargazing. Do people still do that?

The guy looks his age, maybe older, and despite his mother’s consistent reminders of Stranger Danger, he feels like he can trust him. He figures if there was any malice in the boy he just met, Lulu wouldn’t be reacting in such a manner, seemingly adamant on doing anything to get close to the stranger again.

“Uh…I’m Sky.”

The stranger smiles, “Mark.”

“Oh, and this is Lulu,” His arms ache from trying to keep her still and he opts to wrap her leash around his hand and let her go, instead. She immediately jumps against Mark and beams happily when he reaches down to pet her again. “Sorry again, this never happens. I guess she just really likes you.”

“It’s okay. I’m good with dogs, had my own little pup back home.”

Sky watches as Mark kneels down so that Lulu can pepper his face with kisses again. “Oh, where are you from?”

Mark pauses momentarily before glancing up, “Just…up north.”

It takes the better part of five minutes to try and pry Lulu away from Mark’s side. They say three goodbyes, but she grows restless, pulling and chasing after him each time they try to part ways. Mark offers to accompany them on their walk home to calm her, and Sky willingly accepts.

“Are you sure? I don’t want to trouble you or her any more than I already have.”

His tone was innocent enough for Sky to trust that he wasn’t some creep. “I’m sure.”

Conversation surprisingly comes easy. It isn’t until they approach his apartment that he asks, “Were you really stargazing? I don’t know anyone who has done that in ages.”

Mark shrugs, “It reminds me of home. I miss it more every night because the stars keep disappearing.”

“It’s all the light pollution.” Sky fishes his keys out of his pocket. He’s grateful that Lulu has finally seemed to calm down, no longer barking and now sitting patiently with doe eyes trained up at Mark. “Thanks for walking me back. And for not turning out to be some weird creep. She seems like she’s calmed down.”

Mark nods, “Of course.”

“Hey.” Sky calls out for him as he starts to walk away, “Just because you can’t see them doesn’t mean they aren’t really there.”

*

They see each other again the next month.

“Sky?”

“Oh, hey.” It is late afternoon and the café is empty. Sky pauses at the sight of Mark behind the front counter. The tips of his hair are now a vibrant blue. “I like your hair.”

 “Oh, thanks.”

“It looks good.” Sky glances behind him to ensure he isn’t holding up the line. “You work here? I’ve never seen you.”

Mark nods, “Yea, only during the day though. Gives me something to do.”

It just feels natural. When no other customers enter the café, Mark slides into the seat across from Sky with an Americano in hand.

Again, conversation comes easy. The music playing faintly in the background, the people that pass by, Lulu, how despite the privilege of working from home, Sky desperately needed some caffeine in his system.

Lulu has rarely ever given him trouble. Thus, he is baffled as he keeps losing sleep to the sounds of barks and whimpers in the middle of the night. He pulled himself out of bed to check on her the previous night, only to find her seated before the low windows of the apartment, looking down at the people below. She eats irregularly now, barks enough for his neighbors to mention, and often paws at the front door in attempts to open it herself.

He worriedly voices these aloud as he considers taking her to the vet. Mark seems to sober up. “Damn, that sounds kind of serious. How long has this been going on?”

“I’m not sure. I just don’t know how to help her. Maybe you’re the person she’s always up waiting for.” Sky chuckles at the end of his statement.

“It’s nice to see how much you love her. Plus, she’s adorable.”

“You should come see her again some time.” He means it humorously at first. But with the coffee in his system, and the peaceful hour (it had been an hour already?) that had just passed between the two, he figures, why not? “Actually, yea. Do you want to come over to see her, sometime?”

Mark is dazing off out of the window where the sun starts to set. The sunlight should be blinding in some sense, but he stares on with wide, hopeful eyes.

“Mark?”

He shakes out of his daze. “Sorry. Um…no I couldn’t. I don’t want to be a bother.”

“I would like you to, though.” Sky watches his reaction closely. He seems taken aback, almost shocked at the statement. “This was really nice, and Lulu would be really happy to see you again. I would, too.”

Mark’s eyes smile first, something akin to gratitude in their reflection. “Are you sure?”

Sky smiles, too. “Positive.”

*

Just like conversations, friendship comes almost too easily. Sky approached the café more often each week, and Mark became a regular companion for dinners and movies in his apartment.

He rarely ate, though. It always chalked up to some variation of “I already ate.”

Lulu usually interrupts before Sky can argue, leaping into Mark’s lap or tackling him as soon as he walks through the door. When Sky wakes at early mornings, she is often still seated by the windows, peacefully watching and waiting. She has stopped barking, though.

It becomes pretty clear that Mark is the one she watches for. Sky is just happy to see her so happy.

*

“Sorry, what?”

Sky laughs. He catches Mark dazing off quite often, but he finds it endearing rather than annoying. More often than not his gaze is fixed to the sky, watching, waiting, with something he cannot quite name in the corners of his eyes.

“Chocolate or vanilla?” he asks as he holds up two pints of ice cream.

Mark stares blankly through the space between his red bangs before he shrugs. “I’ve never had it. Whatever you choose.”

He turns back to the window and brushes off Sky’s lamenting with a smile. How the hell have you never had ice cream?

*

“Do you want to come see my home town?”

Mark’s head snaps up from where he is sprawled across Sky’s couch, Lulu taking her usual position across his lap. “What?”

Sky lowers the volume of the movie playing on the TV. “I’m going back for some work meetings and to see my mom. You said you never really traveled, so do you want to come with me?”

He looks as if Sky had just asked him to do a backflip. “You…want me…to come?”

Sky smiles. He likes the way things are now. He has friends, a stable job, and a dog that he loves more than life itself. But now, what he looks forward to most are these quiet moments at night with Mark. Maybe it’s just the peaceful rest that Lulu gets when he is here, but Sky basks in his company. “Yea, I do.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

*

They are walking back to Sky’s house. His mom had texted with the promise of some warm soup waiting for them. Taking Lulu to the nearby dog park should not have been as difficult as it was. The moment Mark had started playing with her on the grass, the remaining dogs charged towards him and tackled him to the ground with licks and cuddles. It took the better part of half an hour to successfully pull Mark away.

They turn onto his street and Sky stops to tie his shoes. The streetlamp above them flickers and extinguishes, but they are not consumed with darkness. When Sky looks back up, all he sees is Mark, gazing up at the sky with the same look as always. Lulu is seated beside him, mirroring his gaze with the same expression. The moonlight highlights the blonde streaks in his hair. The night is dark and cold again, but all he sees is Mark, and he is bright.

It doesn’t hit him like a wrecking ball. It isn’t a sudden realization that knocks the wind out of his lungs. It is a revelation that was gradually growing and developing from the moment he first saw Mark laying in the grass.

“Can I ask you something?” he asks as he stands.

Mark takes a second to look back down and keep walking. “Of course.”

“Did it hurt when you fell?”

Mark’s brows furrow and his lips curl upwards, “What? Like from heaven? I didn’t think you like cheesy pickup lines but-”

“No.” Sky says, keeping his eyes set forward as they approach his house. “You know what I mean.”

“I don’t-”

“From the sky.”

Mark stops walking. Lulu stops with him. The moon is slim but bright tonight, and for a few moments, all is still.

“A little.” He says, twirling Lulu’s leash around his pointer finger. For the first time in ages, his voice is unsteady. “How did you know?”

Sky digs his hand into his pocket in search of his keys. “You work all day, don’t sleep, don’t eat. You don’t even have a place to stay. When you’re not with me, you just wander all night. Lulu barks at night whenever she sees you from the window. And…”

“And?”

Sky finally looks up. Mark is looking back at him the way that he usually looks at the sky. “And you always stare up at the sky like that. It’s clearly what you consider home.”

*

Their dynamic doesn’t necessarily change, but Sky can feel it coming when Mark knocks on his door close to midnight one evening.

“I wanted to show you something.” His hair has now faded to a faint purple. “Want to go for a walk?”

Lulu likes the sound of that.

*

Mark stops them at the park where they first met. The fresh air of spring has allowed delicate flowers to sprout from the fields, now colored with a vibrant spectrum that puts Mark’s hair to shame. The petals cushion their bodies as they lay down to watch the stars. For the first time in weeks, they are scattered, visible, and bright in the sky.

He follows Mark’s fingers as he points out and explains various constellations. He would never be able to find them on his own, but here, he listens and follows calmly. Enough time passes for the stars to start shifting, and Sky would have drifted off if Mark hadn’t stopped abruptly at the Canis Major.

“Thank you.”

Sky turns towards Mark to find that he is already looking back. Lulu is asleep across his chest, but like usual, he doesn’t seem to mind. There are daisies framing the crown of his head. He takes a breath before speaking, “For what?”

“For everything. For being a friend I didn’t think I needed. For taking me to your hometown where the stars are so clear. For accepting me.” Mark says as he pulls an aster from the ground and runs his fingers across the petals. “I felt like I was just floating aimlessly in the middle of nowhere, and no one would miss me when I’m gone. I thought I had no place in the sky. Next thing I know, there’s a supernova. That’s what I thought it was until I opened my eyes and I was on the ground.”

Lulu jolts against his chest and he brings a hand up to calm her.

“I felt lost. Until you. You reminded me that I have a home. You gave me a home.” He smiles and the roots of his hair darken to a shade of black that matches the sky. “Thank you.”

“No, thank you,” he blurts out, “you gave me one, too. Lulu, as well.”

Mark smiles, “Lulu has definitely been one of the perks of being down here.”

The crickets nearby stop chirping for a heartbeat or two, and then they are left with nothing but the twinkles of the skylight and the presence of each other. Sky takes the aster from Mark’s hands, “I’ll miss you.”

“Are you sure?”

There is no hesitation in Sky’s voice when he says, “Positive.”

“I’ll still be here,” Mark whispers, “Just because you don’t see something doesn’t mean it isn’t really there.”

*

When Sky wakes, Mark is gone.

He turns on his side and finds nothing but the imprint of his body in the flowers and Lulu cuddled into his side.

Hours have passed. If he stays out long enough, maybe he’ll catch the sunrise. Before the night slips away, he turns his gaze back upwards. The last constellation that Mark had pointed out is sparkling with attention, and a new star is sitting at the tip. It is the brightest in the night sky, by far, and Sky smiles knowing he had found his way back.

Home is relative.

It is not material or concrete. It is an idea, one that brings comfort during restless nights and peace in the midst of uncertainty.

Lulu wakes and sits up properly. When the star flickers in the darkness, she looks up and barks. Sky smiles.

He is finally home.