Letting Go

In an old brick remodeled house that was once a gunshop at one time lived two best friends by the names of Doug and Inna. Doug and Inna met ten years prior and decided to live together and split the bills.

They of course had their ups and downs like all best friends did but for the most part they enjoyed each others company. They worked hard all day and would come home and eat supper together and talk about their day and watch some television or maybe play a couple gsmes of scrabble then go to bed to get up to the same routine the next day.

Inna had only one complaint about her best friend Doug and that was that he worked too much and they rarely soent any down time on their days off together. She loved him for who he was but often told him he should slow down and enjoy life before it was too late.

Doug of course never paid much attention to her request though. That is not until Doug started feeling ill and exhausted. One day Inna made the remark that he looked like he was losing weight. They made a doctors appointmentand went to see why Doug was so tired all the time. They did a Ct scan and discovered that Doug had a very large mass in his intestine and through more testing over a period of time they discovered that Doug had cancer.

TThis news devistated the two best friends and the next three years were a true test of friendship for the two. Inna quit working to take care of Doug who was sick more so than not. Doug had to quit his job and go on disability so not only did they deal with cancer but financial worries also since disability didnt pay a third of what they were used to making.

Over a period of the next three years Inna worried about and prayed and took care of Doug the best she could. The cancer was terminal and after many life altering operations she come to terms with the fact that there was nothing she could do to save Doug so she sat by his side everyday and watched him struggle and suffer in pain as well as the mental anguish he went through. The cancer eventually spread to his liver then his lungs and stomach to his brain.

Doug wanted nothing more for this to all be a bad dream but no matter how hard he wished it there was no avoiding the fact that it wasnt. He had so many things he still wanted to do with her and for her wishing he would have listened when she told him he needed to slow down and enjoy life before it was too late.

It was too late though, there was no getting back time now in fact all they had was very little time. Doug couldnt tolerate the chemotherapy treatments so there was nothing for them to do but wait.

The two of them got married on September 9th 2016 and Doug passed away in there home surrounded by family and friends on September 21st 2018.

IInna always thought she had to tell him it was ok to go home to Heaven so that he knew it was gonna be okay, that she was going to be okay. She lost her best friend to cancer and a couple years later she was thinking about those last years and she realized that it wasn't him that needed to let go...she had to tell him it was okay to go to Heaven because she was in fact the one who needed to let go..she needed him to know it was ok that she would be okay and that she was letting him go because that was the only reason he had'nt. It was all because he was waiting for her to let go.

She still misses him and thinks about him and cries from time to time but in her heart she knows that she had to love him enough to let him go to end his suffering and to be at peace. The hardest thing she had ever had to do but did do out of love for her husband and her best friend.