After Breakfast One Morning

“Speak now.”

A wall of red wood towers over me as I stand in the massive court room. I don’t remember how I arrived in this land of purple giants and I only partially understand how I have offended them. I can’t deny the scene in front of me, however.

“I said speak now!” the giant judge bellowed.

“As I tried to explain before I don’t know how I got here and…”

“Speak louder! Oh, never mind. Uglin! Put the tiny creature on the bench.”

I am scooped up before I know what is happening. I am afraid of being told to speak again so I begin as soon as I stop wobbling.  I am confused about and grateful for the fact that the giants speak English.

 “I don’t know how I came to be in your village. And I certainly didn’t mean to trespass. I’m terribly sorry…”

“Either you’re guilty or you aren’t. That’s for me to decide. No sense in apologizing.  Magly, approach the bench and state your case.”

A giant that seemed female thundered up to the bench. The vibrations almost causing me to plummet to the floor.

“Your honor, this girl, creature, thing, I found her in my grain field. I have no reason to believe it was stealing but it certainly was trespassing.”

“What say you to this?”

“I just kinda appeared in the field. This morning I was in my own house in a place where all the people are my size. Don’t you believe me? I mean, have you ever seen anything like me before?”

“No, but there are many undiscovered lands in this world. You could have traveled from one of them.”

“Even if I had come from another land in your world, which I don’t think I did, who’s to say that they have the same laws? Maybe it is perfectly acceptable to be in any grain field you wish.”

“Preposterous! I have heard enough. Uglin, put it in, well I suppose a jail cell won’t do it could run between the bars. Quickly clean out the chest in the hall and lock it in there.”

I am scooped up again and carried to the hall. The giant opens the trunk and clears out stacks of dusty paper with one hand and plops me into the trunk with the other. The lids slams shut, and I hear a key turning in the lock. Then all is silent and almost completely dark. There is just a little light streaming in through the keyhole. I sink down into a seat position grateful to rest even if it is on the hard bottom of an old trunk. My feet and shoulders ache. The dust makes me cough. I need to figure out how I got here and how to get home. This morning was nothing out of the ordinary. I remember saying goodbye to my husband and young son as they left the house to begin their day. I was in the kitchen cleaning up after breakfast and planning my day when suddenly was in that field. I was so disoriented. I thought I was in a forest until I realized that the plants towering over me looked more like grass than trees. I was trying to figure out what to do when I heard stomping and loud voices. Farmer Magly had come to inspect her field with one of her workers. She was not happy to see me!

“What are you doing in my field ya little whatever you are?” she had said.

She took me back to her house and called the police on an oversized old-fashioned telephone. I was lost in a sea of red velvet couch cushions while we waited for the authorities. I did try to explain my self! But they could hardly hear me, and I don’t think they cared to. They brought me right to the courthouse and now I am in this stupid box. No one even asked me for my name.

I am lost in my own thoughts for I don’t know how long. Then I fall asleep. I awaken to the creak of the hinges on the trunk and Uglin places thimble full of water and some bread inside and closes the lid again. I am very thirsty, so I drink the water first. Then I inspect the bread. It is definitely what I would call bread, but I don’t know what kind it is. I haven’t eaten since I shared breakfast with my family whenever that was. I am hungry. I try the bread. It’s a bit dry but not bad. How long have I been in here? Is my family home yet? Are they missing me? Do they even realize I am gone? Is this an alternate universe? A different planet? A hyper- realistic dream?

I am starting to work myself into quite a tizzy. I am feeling a little lightheaded. I take some deep breaths and calm down. At least I’m not still in my pajamas! I laugh to myself, as I brush some dust of my jeans.

The lid creaks open again. This time Uglin scoops me up and carries me back to the courtroom. I am placed back on the judge's bench. Is that morning light coming in the windows? The blow of the gavel makes my head ache.

“I have made my ruling" says the judge.

“I hope it gets squished," murmurs Magly.

“Silence! The creature shall be banished and forever exiled from the land!”

Is this good news? Bad news? Before I can decide I am standing in front of my kitchen sink. I have a sponge in my hand, and I am wiping eggs out of a skillet. I am in my own kitchen. In my own house!

I slowly put the sponge down. I walk into the bathroom and stare at my face in the mirror. I take my temperature. No fever. I check the clocks and the calendar. No time has passed. Was it a dream? But it couldn’t have been in was so real and I am not in the habit of falling asleep standing up. I run my fingers through my hair in exasperation. I feel something weird. An oversized kernel of grain. I decide to give myself the day off and go back to bed.