"Hi, Ann!" I uttered as soon as Ann opened her front door. "I've got some juicy dets," I practically shouted, embracing her in a hug.
Chuckling, Ann hugged me back and responded, "I can't wait to hear all about it."
"Aunt Susan!" Corey yelled as he ran from the adjacent room, toward me. "Did you bring Hot Wheels for us?"
I turned toward five-year-old Corey. "Hey there, Corey," I gave an awkward little wave. Behind Corey, Aaron, Corey's two-and-a-half-year-old brother and practically shadow, followed him into the room and came up to me, too.
"Aunt Susan doesn't always have to bring you Hot Wheels," Ann warned. She continued," Besides, you could say hi to your aunt first, ask her how she's doing, and hug her if you're up to it.
Corey stepped forward, placing his little arms around my waist. "Hi, Aunt Susan. How are you doing? Did you bring Hot Wheels for us?"
Ann and I laughed.
"Of course I did," I answered, taking out two identical Batmobile cars from my purse. I handed a car to Corey and another car to Aaron, knowing that they would argue over two different toys.
"Thank you!" exclaimed Corey, beginning to rip his package open. "These are so cool! Batman is my favorite."
"Batman's my favorite, too," echoed Aaron. "Corey, can you open mine, please?" he asked Corey, handing him his Batmobile Hot Wheels car.
"You're very welcome," I answered and they ran to the adjacent playroom, making zoom noises, playing with their cars.
"Okay, I need to talk to you," I grabbed Ann's arm and led her to the dining room table to sit down. "I went on that date with Mike two weeks ago."
"Oooh, what happened?" Ann’s voice dropped to almost a whisper as the boys played nearby.
"We went to that restaurant on 4th and Rose, you know that fancy steakhouse? I wore my tightest black dress."
"That one with the plunging neckline," Ann gasped. "Very lucky guy. You look hot in that."
"What's hot?" Corey suddenly appeared from the other room with Aaron trailing right before him.
Ignoring his question, Ann asked, "Do you kiddos need help with anything?”
"Yes, please Momma," Corey answered. "Do you know where my Hot Wheels track is? The red and blue one?"
"Of course I do, baby. You left it in my room yesterday. I'll go grab it." Ann hurriedly went to her room, bringing the track back with her.
"Thank you, Momma," he grinned, running back into the other room with Aaron. "Aaron, let’s go set this up and put the cars on it.”
Ann turned toward me. "We’ll have to talk a lot quieter. I tell you, those boys have excellent hearing considering their ears are only the size of small tomatoes."
"Okay," I whispered to Ann as she sat down again. "We went to that fancy steakhouse and Mike was dressed in a fitted navy suit - and I already knew when I saw him that I was going to sleep with him. Like, he looked so good. I honestly didn't think were to make it through dinner, especially with the steamy glances we kept giving each other."
"Momma!" yelled Corey, appearing from the other room along with Aaron. "His car crashed into mine. I don't know which one is mine."
Rolling her eyes at me, Ann turned toward Corey. "You both have the same car."
"Yeah," countered Corey, "but he," Corey pointed at Aaron, "put his car in his mouth. I don't want cooties!"
Aaron looked like he was on the verge of tears. "It's okay," Ann acknowledged. "I'll wash both cars off in the sink, but then you'll have to keep track of the one you want from there."
"Thanks, Momma!" Corey looked relieved. "I'll put a cool Batman sticker on my car so I won't mix it up with Aaron's."
"I want a sticker, too," Aaron piped up.
Following Ann to the sink as she started washing the Hot Wheels with a towel, I lowered my voice and whispered in her ear. "So, we just finished our entree and the waiter hadn't even come by to ask if we wanted dessert when he let me know his..."
"Momma, are you done yet?" interrupted Corey, impatiently.
"Yes, here you go. Try not to mix them up this time," replied Ann as she handed a car back to Corey and Aaron. The two raced back into the playroom to play.
We walked back over to the dining room table and sat down.
"Please continue," whispered Ann, after hearing to make sure the kids were focused back on playing with their cars.
"Well," I proceeded, "he let me know his place was nearby. "So, I was like, screw it! He's super hot. I haven't been with anyone for over six months. And I said let's forget about dessert and go back to his place."
Ann's eyes went wide. "What happened then?"
"I've never seen anyone flag down a waiter to pay so fast in his life."
Crying suddenly started up from the next room. "Momma!" yelled Corey. "Aaron's upset that I told him we can't have the same sticker."
Ann went into the other room, informing the boys they would need to play another game as the Hot Wheels were causing too much trouble.
"Each of you picks a different toy you want to play with and your Aunt Susan and I will play with each toy or game you pick, okay?"
"Okay!" Aaron and Corey yelled in unison.
Coming back into the room, Ann apologized. "I hate to rush your awesome story, but the kids are melting down. We have like a minute before they each come in with a toy and we have to play with them."
"Okay, I whispered, rushing my words. "It was the best sex of my life. And we're going out again next week. It’s still early, but my period hasn't come yet, and I'm freaking out."
"Momma, what's a period?" Corey asked, suddenly appearing from the other room, holding a big, red fire truck.
"You kids really have great hearing. I'm starting to think you may be part bat, answered Ann.
"What’s a period?" asked Corey again.
Ann hesitated and then replied, "It's something that goes at the end of a sentence...and also without it, you may be looking at a life sentence."
"Like you kids," mouthed Ann to me. "A literal life sentence."
"I don't get it," Corey said, shrugging.
We both laughed. "Come on kiddo, your Aunt Susan and I are ready to play with you and your brother."
"Yes!" shrieked Corey, quickly forgetting about his earlier question, as we walked over to the playroom to play with him and Aaron.
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