Kapey's Story (War of Lust and Love)

It happened again. Another night filled with lust-driven fantasies. They always start with Kapey and his crush (Yayben) talking about life, and their futures, and just enjoying each other's company. Until Yayben leans in to kiss him. He tries to resist but can't and things get more intimate between the two, but before things get too far a scythe splits both of them in half top to bottom. The last thing Kapey sees is a creature with a horse-like head and humanoid body in full medieval plate armor. It sometimes eats Yayben, sometimes both of them. This cycle has been going on for three weeks and it started sometime after Kapey started to have a crush on Yayben. Yet the pain of seeing himself constantly falling into lust only to be killed and eaten in one gulp by the monster was wearing him done mentally. Almost to the point, he can't even concentrate on schoolwork, swimming, and any other activities he does. Kapey didn't know who to look to for advice and was too embarrassed to talk to his dad about this.

Then one day as he was in school. There was a school assembly and the speaker introduced himself "Hello everyone, my name is Lichstien, I am a certified therapist and an occasional public speaker. Today I want to talk to you all about what I like to call The War of Lust and Love." The crowd of students' mood was a mix of cringe and snickering. He continued "Now this mostly applies to all the guys but ladies this will help expose some things a lot of guys wish to hide or ignore." A few ladies snickered awkwardly and some of the guys, Kapey included, felt called out. Lichstien continued "Now I'm going to start with a question: Have any of you got a crush on someone and in your mind you saw your crush make the first move and kiss you?" Many hands went up, most guys, but there were several girls as well, Kapey raised his hand. Lichstien then asked a similar question "Alright, similar circumstance but did you make the first move and kiss your crush?" The overwhelming majority were guys. "Good, and for those who have not raised their hands. You are either lying or have been blessed to not fight such an enemy." This made the crowd snicker quietly. Lichstien went on with his presentation and showed the difference between lust and love stating "Lust is selfish and always originates in the flesh. Love though is selfless and originates from a source greater than the material slash physical world. To make this point clear Lust is about sex and only sex because it's all about you. Love is beyond sex and is beyond you because it's not about you anymore it's about the connection between two people forming a family under the influence of the True God." These words felt like they went straight through Kapey and went right to lust and dealt a deadly blow to it. A sense of relief and hope washed over him. After the assembly, Everyone was given a card for Lichstein's therapeutic services.

After coming back home Kapey gave the card to his parents and talked about what Lichstien said and thought it would be a good idea to try it out and see if it helps. His mom was worried but his dad was glad. They decided to try it out even though the price tag was a bit much. They scheduled an appointment. That week they drove to the therapy session and Kapey sat on a black leather couch in a very minimalist room. No paintings, no photos, nothing. Lichstien was sitting on a big cloth chair with a clipboard.

"Hello, Kapey Waters. I take it you're a water sorcerer?" he asked. "Yes, sir," answered Kapey. "Interesting, now what brings you here?" asked Lichstien. "Well, you came to my school and talked about the War of Lust and Love and we were given business cards." Lichstien seemed surprised by the answer and wrote something on his clipboard. "So lust is why you are here?" asked Lichstien. "Yes, sir. I'm too scared to talk about it with my dad and my mom doesn't understand it at all," said Kapey. "Ah, and you think I'm a better option. Well, since you seem like you want to fight back, that makes my job a whole lot easier. Now let me ask you when you have lustful thoughts what are they typically like? What are the events that repeat the most?" asked Lichstien. "Well, it's me and my crush and we talk about something, then almost as a reward or just because she kisses me. Then things get more sexual until she is killed with a scythe which is wielded by a creature with a horse-like head but has a humanoid body and is covered in armor. This repeats with slight variations but they all end with the creature killing her and sometimes me." answered Kapey. "I see, well I can tell the creature is Sombres." said Lichstien, "Sombres? Who is that?" asked Kapey. "He's the monster of True God. He purifies people by killing and destroying their past sins, which causes a lot of pain, but it doesn't kill the person being purified however, in your case, I believe it is your faith being manifested," responded Lichstien. "So he's real but not actually in my head, but instead an illusion of him is in my head in order to keep me pure?" asked Kapey. "Short answer yes, the long answer would take up our entire session," said Lichstien. "Huh, so this entire time I've been resisting lust and never knew it?" asked Kapey. "Yes, but it seems like you are struggling to keep it at bay and it already has done some damage. Otherwise, you wouldn't be here. That being said I do think you are further ahead than most, which again makes my job easier. Now that we know what the problem is and where you are at fixing it, we can focus on where you are failing. Tell me when these thoughts occur when and where are you " asked Lichstien. "Throughout the day they appear when I'm bored and whenever I see my crush. At night, things are really bad because I experience what I described to you on repeat until I go into a deep sleep, which can take a long time for me to do," answered Kapey. He didn't realize just how vulnerable he was being, telling this random person the deepest insecurities that he was scared to even tell his parents about. He was purposely hiding these things only to put them on full display in front of this man, who he hadn't even really met. "I will tell you that lust is an enemy every male must fight. I heard one client tell me "Lust is one of the few things where you never beat. You either become its slave or you die fighting it." but I think with you. We might be able to beat this together." said Lichstien. The same sense of hope at the assembly hit Kapey again. It was like it was only a matter of time before lust would die and he could finally live life again. "I just have a few more questions, but they revolve around your crush so it's too personal I can stop, okay?" asked Lichstien. Kapey just nodded. "Good, first question: How long have you had your crush and have you had any previously?" asked Lichstien. "About three weeks, as for a previous crush, not really. I have found several girls attractive but those feelings usually die off in a short amount of time," answered Kapey. "Ah, another symptom of lust, but that is good that the feelings die as quickly as they are made. For some guys, they will spend days thinking about a girl they met once, almost to the point of making it an obsession, however, I feel that with your answers your obsession is getting rid of lust rather than having been an obsession. It's almost as if you are scared of it. Tell me are you a control freak or is only this one instance?" asked Lichstien. "I definitely am not a control freak, I'm a water sorcerer going with the flow is literally my entire personality, because I know better than to try and control the tides or the flow of a river," answered Kapey. "Uh-huh, that might explain your struggle. You're reacting to lust, letting it dictate your moves, which might explain why you have not gained any progress recently. Plus you are still in the early stages of having a crush which makes this conflict harder to fight. So until we meet again I want to continue to resist but try to gain control of the lustful thoughts, don't just "go with the flow" instead be like a stone in a river, let it go over you, and not move you. I know it's the complete opposite of what you're used to doing but try it and see if it works. Thank you for coming." said Lichstien both of the guys got up and shook hands and Kapey walked out with more confidence than ever before.

That night when the lust thoughts came and his crush tried to kiss Kapey moved backward. Until he was on his back and his crush was on top of him trying to flirt with him in the process. Kapey then saw a clear glass of water nearby and summoned it and splashed his crush. "Why did you splash me?" she asked angrily. "Because I don't feel comfortable kissing you. It doesn't feel right to me," said Kapey. "Wait you don't right kissing a girl?" asked his crush. "No, I dream it all the time, but I want to dream it when I'm married and in love," said Kapey. "So you don't love then?" asked his crush. "I don't know. I do like you a lot, but-" Kapey got interrupted when his crush kissed him. Sombres then came and drove his scythe into his crush's back and swung her off of him. Dang it! he said to himself. But he understood what Lichstien met about being a stone in a river. But he was still reacting. Also realizing Sombres was a helpful being rather than a hurtful one changed Kapey's perception and made for more comfortable seeing his crush be killed over and over again. The same scenario played out and every time Kapey would get kissed but it took longer each and every time, not only that but Sombres would get more gruesome and violent with his attacks. There was a time when Sombres would change from killing Kapey's crush to breaking through the scene like paper or shattering it like glass. There was one night the scene kept popping over and over and Kapey could hear Sombre's breathe. Like he was getting tired. It could be his faith wavering under the attacks from lust but he did document his dreams the best he could and gave them to Lichstien to read.

"You're making progress, good, very good. Now here's an idea rather than Sombres killing your crush what if it was you. Better yet was if was you and Sombres." said Lichstien. "I could try but I would feel bad about it," said Kapey. "Listen you don't stop and kill this evil. It will kill you one way or another. The difference is that it draws power from your mind and heart. You draw your power outside of that which is much stronger and lasts way longer." said Lichstien. "What would that be?" asked Kapey. "The True God, the embodiment of love itself, try that and come back with the results next session," said Lichstien.

Kapey did just that. He not only resisted but he used the water to drown the fake versions of his crush in many different ways. He did combos with Sombres. They destroyed multiple versions and scenarios. The fight against lust felt like it was close to being a win for him. Throughout his war with lust, he has been struggling to focus on other things but ever since he started fighting back, he felt like he had more control. He felt like he could focus more on school and swimming, his prayers had been answered even though to this day he is still fighting lust. The war nearly ended when Kapey learned his crush got a boyfriend and that severed much of lust's power. Only to shortly be empowered by a new crush this time Kapey dated and years later they married. As the saying goes "One can't beat lust. You either are a slave to it or fighting it."