The Repetition Task

“Oh ,how many times have I pulled off early mornings and late nights every day which were dedicated to learning a new song on piano. But, I think I’ve barely scratched the surface of becoming a great pianist,” my inner voice scolded me aggressively.

I didn't actually mean to treat myself like that, but sadly my ego took it too far. I was not a huge fan of music and I had a mixture of an amateur and soldier mindset, which is not the mindset that you would wish to have in your life. I was proud, reluctant and wanted to be spotlighted as a great musician without effort. Everyday kept on playing and playing repeatedly both day and night for days wishing for bubble reputation and instant success. But, I never had the ability to convince myself to recall that success does take a whole lot of time. I never took the time to admire the music or go beyond my imaginations to write my own piece of music. 

I was gazing at the milky white and terrifyingly glossy keys staring right at me. I got so depressed that I jammed the piano keys right in front of me. Trust me, the sound was not pleasant. With no clue in my mind, my brain started to panic so I ran out to catch a breath of fresh air to calm me down. My head was almost burning with frustration.

While I was gasping for breath, I saw my neighbour painting a portrait of his dog. Now Jim (apparently my neighbour) is the kind of person who is very patient and focused on his work. After all, his dog was not interested and it ended up upsetting the most beautiful painting. I was speechless. Then I ran to the neighbours house to take a look at the incident. To tell my story, I invited him for tea for a long, long discussion.

In the evening, he arrives to tea with his dog dangling behind him. To be honest, if I was him, I would have beaten the dog up because of his mischief.

“Depressing days no see!” I said to him while pouring the English breakfast tea onto a plain white cup.

“No, not really,” said my patient neighbour or Jim, taking the cup and sipping the mint flavoured tea.

“Well I had the most depressing days,” I said in a sad and an awfully depressing tone.

“You know, I’ve started my journey into becoming a great pianist, but I simply can’t understand why I don’t have the interest (because it is repeated) or the passion to do it,” I said in a monotonous and the most boring voice you would ever hear in your life. 

The conversation went long enough about his life experiences and his outnumbering attempts to become an artist and then he finally cut to the point that I’ve been searching for.

He said that younger generations have the habit of getting offended just because of their vicious and vile ego. As I said before I had a mix of a soldier and an amateur mindset. I thought I was great at everything and had the mindset to get everything perfect each try. I never learned from my mistakes, instead I released the output using anger (or simply in this instance jamming the piano). He said that he had tried many times to paint a beautiful portrait of his dog but all he could do was to paint a new one without any offence. He told me that he found his motivation from Thomas Alva Edison, a great scientist who experienced more failures in his life, more than you could count. The amazing fact is that he repeated the same thing over and over again. Every mistake made him closer to creating the light bulb. Therefore ,he analyzed every mistake and its cause that led him to the path leading to successful output.

With my new found motivation I thanked him for the inspiration. Walking towards the piano, I feel my anger rising due to my angry mindset. My hands started shivering and I started turning pale but, because of the motivation, I pulled the chair, kept my shaking hands on the piano and started playing while respecting the music. I felt the beautiful and calming sounds of the tones and the beautiful sound of the strings. The house had a pleasant and positive vibe. I consider that particular moment as a “Zen” moment. Overtime I started building the habit of appreciation of each moment. Even though I was at the same position or the same place, each second is a new moment that you have never experienced in your life. This understanding led me to a significant improvement in both my skills as well as my mindset.  

In the first few days I felt the resistance that made me reluctant. As time went by my motivation grew stronger after hearing the story from my neighbour. Plus I’ve planned to thank him again later for his true words of wisdom. I started playing with deep interest.

A few months later I bounced on to my neighbour who was showing off his painting which he successfully drew after many attempts. 

Jim asked me, “Have you controlled your ,well, your ego?”

I said, “Yes certainly, simply because of your inspirational advice.”

“It really resonated in my mind,” I said fidgeting my fingers.

“I truly am really appreciative that you took my life lessons and applied it in your own life,” Jim said joyfully.

Over the journey, I’ve understood that success does take time and energy and that you need passion, vision, creativity and self made motivation to drive through our inner ego. Similarly, you can apply my neighbour's advice when you do something. Whether it’s reading a book, playing a sport, studying the same thing or playing the same board game over and over again repeatedly. Remember that every second is a new moment and make each failure count and eventually you will be the desired person who you wanted to be. With this understanding you will be your own role model that will drive you forward.