A New New Normal

I woke up to the sound of my phone buzzing continuously. I let it ring a few times and hoped that the person on the other would get the hint and stop calling. Unfortunately, whoever was calling needed me right then and there and couldn’t wait until a reasonable hour to talk to me. After the third call came through I rolled over and grabbed my phone off the bedside table. 

“Why?” I answered the phone without even looking at the caller ID.

“Alessia, tell me you watched the news this morning,” Devin’s voice came out from the other end.

“No, you woke me up.”

“Get out of bed right now and turn on Channel 7.”

“Ugh, why? I still have an hour of sleep left in my system,” I complained while rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. There was no way I would have been able to get back to sleep now. 

“Just do it. I want to see your reaction.”

“Fine,” I said and got out of bed and walked into my living room. I turned on the television and tuned into Channel 7.

“... Mark today on your calendars as the day where the quarantine has been lifted. After a year the pandemic is now contained enough to get back to normal lives. So, get out there and hug your friends and family, I know will. I am Lauren Collins and thank you for watching Channel 7 news. Tune in at 12 o’clock for the noontime news,” the news anchor announced. 

“Alessia! Hello? Are you still there?” I heard Devin’s voice while I was frozen with shock. 

“Y-yea, I’m still here. Is this for real? Please tell me that this isn’t a joke,” I pleaded with Devin. Over the past year we had been given so many moments of false hope, I didn’t want to immediately jump to conclusions.

“That’s what I thought, too. I had to check like ten other news articles for confirmation. They all said the same thing,” Deven said, sounding giddy and about to burst from excitement. 

“Oh my gosh, I can’t believe it. What are we going to do?” I asked while trying to steady my body. Everything in me felt like it was starting to vibrate from excitement mixed with fear. What now? How do we get back to normal?

“I don’t know yet, but I’m on my way to your apartment right now. Be ready because we are going out,” Devin said and I heard the background noises of him getting his keys and his shoes on. 

“Right now? I just got out of bed?”

“Yes right now. What were you going to do? Go back to sleep? Not after this news. Hurry up cause I just got into the elevator. Be there in ten,” Devin hung up before I even got to say goodbye.

I lightly tossed my phone on the couch and plopped myself down next to it. I let out a huff and stared at the television that was now playing a rerun of one of my favorite sitcoms. I felt weird after hearing the news. Was it the feeling of being lost? I redefined my whole life to fit into the bounds of quarantine and now I had to change it all over again. 

Minutes passed while I was in deep contemplation and figured that if Devin got here before I was ready to leave he would have a conniption. I got up from the couch and walked into my room while my body still shook.

***

I was gathering my hair to put in a low bun when I heard persistent knocking on the door. I didn’t even have to ask who it was to know that it was Devin. Then I heard his voice call out, “Alessia, hurry up.”

I rolled my eyes and rushed to the door to hush Devin’s calls. My neighbors were not going to appreciate him yelling like this. I opened the door and said, “Hold up, I’m almost done getting ready. Come in.” Despite the lift of quarantine, Devin still had a face mask on. I walked away from the door and started to make my way back to my room with Devin following me. “You know you shouldn’t yell like that. One day a neighbor is going to get mad and take out on me because I live here.”

“Oh come on that won’t happen, your neighbors love me,” I looked back at Devin and furrowed my brows at him. “Am I allowed to take off my mask?” Devin asked.

I shrugged.“I mean we’re not under lockdown again so I guess. If you cough though you are putting it back on again and getting as far away from me as possible,” I half joked. 

Devin took off the mask and when I watched him do it, a slight feeling of fear came over me but I reminded myself that it was okay now to go back to life as normal.

“Alessia, why aren’t you ready yet? I gave you an ample amount of time to look presentable.” 

“Sir, you woke me from my sleep. Forgive me for not being able to get ready at lightning speed.” 

“Yea okay just get ready. I want to leave as soon as possible, I have a feeling that all of the restaurants are going to be crowded.”

“So, uh, Devin, what does this whole thing mean?” I asked in hopes that Devin’s thoughts would help me make sense of mine. 

“Well, I think it means that we can go back to normal now,” Devin answered simply while scrolling through his phone. I felt some kind of frustration build up inside of me and I turned away from the mirror.

“No, be serious right now. What do you think this means for life as we know it? How do we get back to normal? What is normal?” I asked and plopped onto the bed next to where Devin was sitting. 

Devin leaned back next to me and we stared at the ceiling for a few seconds before he gave me an answer. “I don’t know that we would be able to get back to exactly where we were before. I mean we just spent a whole year being afraid of interacting with other people, we can’t just completely change overnight, literally.”

“Is it weird that I don’t even know if I want to get back to life as we once knew it? I don’t know how to function properly in society anymore,” I confessed. I hoped that I wasn’t the only person who felt this way. Everyone had to adapt to a new lifestyle so going back to our old way of life would mean that we would all have to adapt all over again.

After a beat, Devin finally answered my question, “You’re not the only one,” I heard Devin sigh and he tapped my thigh as he sat up, “Come on, if we don’t leave now we’ll never be able to get a sit anywhere.” 

“Fine, let’s go,” I huffed and sat myself up as well, “Where are we off to?”

“Let’s just see what’s available to us,” Devin chuckled. We both got up from the bed and grabbed our things. Before I left the door, I took out a mask from my bedside bowl of masks. Force of habit. I stood there for a second contemplating if I really needed one but took it instead. Just in case.

***

After what felt like hours, Devin and I finally got to a restaurant that wasn’t completely full. When we first stepped onto the street, I put on my mask and looked around me at everyone who wasn’t wearing one. I slowly peeled mine off of my face and put my mask into my pocket. I wasn’t feeling completely secure in no face coverage but this was something that I would have to get used to again. 

“Just checking. How does it feel for you to be out in public without a mask? I, personally, am kind of freaking out,” Devin said to me from across the table. 

“My heart could not be beating any faster than it is right now,” I answered back.

Devin nodded his head to show that he understood what I said and then he looked back down at his menu. We didn’t even get to see our waitress before we heard someone cough. I froze in my tracks when I heard this. The whole restaurant went silent, too.

“I was choking on water,” the culprit announced in order to clear up any confusion. 

“He was, I saw,” his friend confirmed. 

Once everyone assessed that this was nothing to freak out over, they went back to their conversations and eating their food. After my reaction to that cough, I realized that I was not ready to be out in the public as exposed as I was at that moment. 

“Alessia, um, can I ask you something?” Devin started.

“Of course.”

“Are you going to think that I’m a wuss if I suggested that we ditch this place and go back to your apartment?” Devin asked. I let out a breath that I didn’t even realize that I was holding. My relief must have shown on my face because Devin put his menu down and stood up from his chair. “Let’s go,” he said as he put on his face mask.

I got up, put my face mask on as well, and followed Devin to the exit. As we walked back to my apartment I could not help but feel ashamed at being unable to make this step. I had a feeling that this transition was going to be harder than I originally thought.