The Fallen Star

Submitted into Contest #74 in response to: Write a story that takes place across ten seconds.... view prompt

81 comments

Contemporary Fantasy Inspirational

Author's note:

This story is set in the same universe as Lucid_Dre@mer_, although it doesn't contain any of the characters like Amara and Sarah. You don't have to read my other story to read this one, since It's not even really related, just set in the same world.

By the way, this story is set from the point of view of the star the girls wished on. Thanks for reading!






The Commander sent you to the place known as the Other-realm. There were people there who deserved Her Power.

The Power she was trusting you to deliver to their fated world.

Waiting on the launchpad, a glowing pink disc set in the blackness of space, with a fantastic view of all the Realms, in your golden warrior-glory, you held on tightly to the Bow and the Staff you would be dropping on the heads of two oblivious mortals.

The only issue was getting them to the landing site. A Sorcerer told you that she had it handled, but after a vivid description of space-time bending, warping to alternate-reality forests, and the art of fallen stars, you grew bored and decided that you would just get your job done.

"Are you ready, Flying Serpent?" the starbender asked. She was small, taking on the form of an elegant human female. But being a Celestial, she glowed a blue-green and had large, pupil-less eyes.

"As ready as I can be," you answered her.

You opened the star-pod and placed the Commander's treasures inside. She had many, many more, but she only advised you to drop two.

With a deep breath, you walked to the edge of the disc, staring down into the blackness of space.

"I'm ready," you said.


You stepped into the star-pod and grabbed the controls.

It rocketed off the platform, falling through the endless of space. You could see many silver objects whizzing by, but soon you had fallen past them. You were leaving the realm in between realms, and fast.

The stars flew past the way the moments of your immortal life had ticked by. A Celestial lived forever, but things could kill them-- like, for example, getting distracted at the wheel of their pod.


Spiraling down, you fell faster than gravity could carry you, rocketing around the way you had through your life, before you found meaning at the Commander's feet, working for Her and the greatness of Her realm.

Your pod approached several small orbs-- planets! --but it was too late, they were far behind you.

Like everything else in your life, you had barreled past them like a rocket. You had always been faster than your sixteen pastel-bright siblings, stronger and smarter, as well. You were at the top of the class, and you were always better than your neighbors at building your house out of stardust, and growing moonflowers in your garden.

You had been the best of the best, your skin's golden glow proving it.

But still, you could fail.

Life was too fast for you, faster than the zip of your pod. Your eternal life ticked by at such a rate you wondered if you'd ever rest.



You felt the controls turn to stone, a pink, glimmering rock. The pod was becoming a comet, made of ice and stone and stardust.

There it was-- your goal.

A blue planet-realm, like the Commander's jeweltone eyes, it loomed in front of you. Your pod was almost sucked into the orbit of a large, desolate moon, but you passed it in less than a mortal second.

The race known as "humans" dwelled in this planet-realm, living on a globe of water, fire, and stone. It was only ten light-seconds away from the nearest disc-world, and it drew closer and closer...

It looked so, so, very far away from where you had been before, but it was more massive than a dragon. More than a Spirit-sea. More than the Commander's velvet-soft robes made of starlight. It had the mass of six flat realms stuck together, and then some.

It was beautiful, as beautiful as the Commander's face, although you knew that it must be war-torn or at least in need of help, if you had to bring the Commander's Power to them.

You entered the atmosphere in a pale-pink flash, the light and speed pushing you to the back of the pod. it wasn't very big, and you knew you had to leave as your pod burned up with a bright flash across the night sky.

With a blast of magic, you left your shrinking, icy pod, nothing but a blast of golden light in your wake.

One minute there, the next, gone.

Like the lives of mortals.

Like everything else in your life, you were fast, faster, and fastest, teleporting away from the pod and into the blankness of a flat, glowing disc-world.

You landed on a watch platform in the disc-world. Many fin-eared, glowing Celestials in more colors than you could imagine looked over the edge of their world, watching a pink streak approach the blue-green planet.

When it left their sight, a big bubble appeared and projected the image into the black sky above. it showed your pod falling closer and closer to a green continent, then a section up at a pointy part, then what looked like a bunch of human dwellings next to each other, coming closer and closer...

It hit with a loud, ear-splitting impact, the bubble shaking. For a short while it was blocked by smoke rising from the crater, only showing gray, until it cleared.

Then, translated into the language of each Celestial, words rang out from the bubble's core-- words of the Commander's chosen two.

"What in the holy heck is that?!"

You smile. It was your work that got the treasures down to the chosen two.

The Commander would be proud. You could practically see Her smile.

She might even appoint you to a high rank like Her assistant! Oh, how wonderful that would be.

You smile as you watch two adolescentย human females approach the pod carefully.

"Look out, Sarah. It might be dangerous. it could explode!"

"I am being careful, Amara!"

Sarah and Amara. What lovely, powerful names. They would be great heroes in their world. Maybe future children would be named after them! All because of you!

You look at the two girls, marveling at them and their courage.

The Commander had made a good choice in her young heroes.




Author's note 2: This story was so short that I needed another Author's Note, so here it is! As you might have guessed if you read Lucid_Dre@mer_: Get Lost In The Woods, this comet-pod is what lands in Amara's backyard, and there is supernatural interferenceย messing with them, and their weird time in the woods. So, yeah! Hopefully this is enough words now! Oh, wait it still isn't! There's some more you might want to know, so here it is!

If you want to be in my part 2, let me know in the comments! You can choose your name and wether you're human or supernatural, all those things. Here's what you should know/decide on unless you want me to randomly customize for you:

Hair color

Eye color

Gender

Human/Supernatural

Age

Friend/foe

First name (you can use your real name)

Last name: (you can use your real name here, too)

Game name (if you're human and a gamer)



Thanks for reading! I think this is enough words now, so bye!


--Jade Kingsley


December 30, 2020 17:08

You must sign up or log in to submit a comment.

81 comments

I love this story so much Jade! I like how it is in the same universe as the last story! You did a great job! :)

Reply

Show 1 reply
. .
18:19 Dec 31, 2020

HEY JADE THE NEW OFFICIAL MALLOW MEETING PLACE IS MY MALLOW STORY AND AKSHAYA SUTRAVE, VARSHA VIMAL, AND SAPPHIRE AND AMETHYST ALL JOINED

Reply

OK! I'll be sure to check them all out, I'm already following Amethyst so it should be easy to get to them.

Reply

Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Akshaya Sutrave
17:29 Dec 31, 2020

Hi Jade! I'm a part of the Marshmallows, too (Luke wanted me to tell you and all the members)

Reply

Alright! Hi, fellow Marshmallow! What can I do for you? :) Anyone need upvoting?

Reply

Akshaya Sutrave
04:12 Jan 01, 2021

Hi fellow Marshmallow! :) The last I checked, it was Varsha Vimal, Kate Reynolds, Nora K, Ana Govindaswamy, Celeste Shinobu, and me.

Reply

Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
. .
17:04 Dec 31, 2020

Hey Jade, Varsha Vimal just became a Mallow too!!

Reply

Show 1 reply
15:38 Dec 31, 2020

Wow, this is reallly good. I liked the universe, it's so different from anything that I've read.

Reply

It's set in the same universe as the other story. It's just set in outer space with supernatural Celestials. :)

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
. .
15:33 Dec 31, 2020

Also my prof name is Litlover, for your bio, bc you said liltlover.

Reply

Show 1 reply
. .
15:30 Dec 31, 2020

OMG I loved this!! If I were you, I would make the star a more complex character, give it more feeling. Here goes (Not all of these actually apply to me) Hair: Brown Eye: Silver Supernatural Age: 16 Mysterious sage XD Luke Last name: Whatever you want!!

Reply

Ok! And I was going to, but I didn't want her to have too much spotlight, since it was more about the journey than her, but I guess I could update it. Wait, do you mean the comet or the comet's driver?

Reply

. .
15:37 Dec 31, 2020

The driver!! It's a great idea!!

Reply

Okay, yeah, maybe she reflects on her life as the planets go by or something.

Reply

. .
15:38 Dec 31, 2020

Yeah!! that's great!!

Reply

Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Jen Park
00:12 Apr 02, 2021

Wow I can't wait to read other series! The setting is space, and I love stories with space setting. I wish the story was longer that we can know more about the characters and plots, but since you have other sequels, I'd better go and read them. :)

Reply

Yeah, this is more of a prequel, but I will have another part out soon!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Daniel R. Hayes
06:36 Feb 23, 2021

Great story I really enjoyed it. I like the world you created and you did a wonderful job writing it.

Reply

Show 1 reply
Dalyane Deblois
21:10 Jan 11, 2021

Great story Jade! Interesting setting and universe. I see you hinted at your characters from other stories at the end, which I think is great! Keep writing!:)

Reply

Show 1 reply
Kate Reynolds
17:49 Dec 31, 2020

Hi Jade! I love this story!!!!! I really liked how it was in 2nd person! Hair color: Brown Eye color: Blue Gender: Female Supernatural Age: 15 Friend First name: Katria (or Katri) Last name: You can pick!

Reply

Okay! Thanks! I spent most of my younger years wondering why there was a first and a third but not a second, and then one day I came across this style and went "aha, here you are!"

Reply

Kate Reynolds
20:43 Dec 31, 2020

XD np!

Reply

Kate Reynolds
20:49 Dec 31, 2020

:)

Reply

Hold on, can her hair be blue, too? Working on the story, and she's a Celestial supernatural and they have colored hair and glow with a halo-like aura.

Reply

Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
<inactive> .
08:19 Dec 31, 2020

Hair color: dark brown Eye color: green Gender: hard to distinguish, but a girl Human/Supernatural; supernatural mage of flowers!! or murder or whatever you need me for!! Age: 13 Friend/foe: friend! First name (you can use your real name): Olive Last name: (you can use your real name here, too): Faye Game name (if you're human and a gamer): you can use this as a nickname, my Animal Crossing villagers call me Olliyay. Because โ€˜itโ€™s Ollie, yay!โ€™ Olliyay!

Reply

<inactive> .
08:20 Dec 31, 2020

Feel free to edit my character for whatever you need ^^

Reply

Okay! That's pretty good, I'm not sure how to fit you in this next idea but maybe you show up once there and then again in a part 3 that I'll likely need? Olive Fate, that's a cool name!

Reply

<inactive> .
18:48 Dec 31, 2020

itโ€™s olive faYe Feel free to make any changes :)

Reply

<inactive> .
05:59 Jan 01, 2021

Oki ty for letting me know! Have fun writing! ^^

Reply

Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply

Hair: purple Eye: rainbow Female Supernatural 18, in Celestial Years First Name: Celeste Last Name: Phoenix I like this story and the ending!

Reply

Thank you! This one was going to be shorter, but there's only so many words you can use to describe ten seconds, so I ended up with this. . .

Reply

Show 2 replies
Show 1 reply

I'm going to put myself in, for no reason. Hair: dark blue Eyes: light blue Gender: Female Supernatural 16, in Celestial years. First name: Thunder Last name: Ray

Reply

Show 0 replies
RBE | Illustration โ€” We made a writing app for you | 2023-02

We made a writing app for you

Yes, you! Write. Format. Export for ebook and print. 100% free, always.