Short setting_ in small city name Bellamore on the June 16,1998.

Narrator: While the night creep into the darkness,the stars light up and shine in the dark sky. Dennis a young child living in Bellamore was looking through his bedroom window. While everybody in Bellamore were peacefully, snoring and deeply asleep in their beds cuddling with their pillows. Dennis with tears pouring from his eyes, looking up in the sky fill with stars and talking to himself.

Dennis: Hello, can anybody hear me?

Dennis: I am looking for my daddy, he living up here now.

Dennis: I wonder if he is really up there?

Dennis: I wonder if I shout he could hear me

Dennis: I am so far, I don't think he could hear me.

Dennis: My voice is tiny like my feet.

Dennis: I wonder what he is doing up there?

Dennis: I really want to talk with him.

Dennis: Daddy can you hear me?.

Dennis: It's Timmy, I can't sleep, I am thinking about you.

Dennis: Does death have a number for me to call you?

Dennis: Does dead have an address for me to write you a letter?

Dennis: Why did you leave without saying goodbye daddy?

Dennis: You, never leave the house without telling me goodbye.

Dennis: Why when you leave for this place call dead,you didn't say


Dennis: I didn't get the chance to say goodbye,kiss nor hug you.

Dennis: I feel really sad and hurt, I couldn't hug,kiss nor hug you.

Dennis: Daddy, please don't stay too long in death.

Dennis: I love your black suit,that you was wearing today.

Dennis: Why were you sleeping in that white big box?

Dennis: I never seen a box before that people go inside.

Dennis: Why didn't you go sleep on your bed?

Dennis: I saw everybody crying today, around your box.

Dennis: Why was everybody crying for you.

Dennis: You are just gone to visit death, you will be back


Dennis: Why is death in the sky.

Dennis: I wonder what death look likes.

Dennis: Could I catch a bus and visit you in death.

Dennis: Could I catch a train and visit you in death.

Dennis: Could I catch a taxi and visit you in death.

Dennis: Could I build a space rocket and visit daddy in death

Dennis: Pastor Micheal said, ''That you were walking on road made

from gold and you have found peace in your soul.''

Dennis: What is your soul daddy?

Dennis: Is it your soul that went to visit death?

Dennis: All these things I want to know.

Dennis: All these new things confuse my little brain, cause

I don't know them.

Dennis: This place call death must be beautiful ,because it has

a road made out of gold.

Dennis: I want to come with you to this place call death and walk

with you on the golden road.

Dennis: I was talking to you today in your box but you wasn't

talking to me.

Dennis: Daddy why were you not talking to me?

Dennis: It's rude to not talk to people,when they are talking too


Dennis: Daddy, when will you be home for us to go fishing?

Dennis: Remember that you, promise to carry me fishing


Dennis: I could remember, that tomorrow would be your day off


Dennis: Daddy, I was told that if, I wanted to talk with you.

Dennis: I just had to look up in the sky.

Dennis: Mommy told me your a star shinning in the sky

and that you have gone to visit a new world.

Dennis: She told me, that you would be back some day.

Dennis: I need to talk with you now daddy.

Dennis: I don't understand what exactly is dead.

Dennis: But I don't like this feeling of sadness and loneliness inside

my tiny heart.

Dennis: What is death daddy ?

Dennis: Why can't I come with you to this land or place call death.

Dennis: I want to see your face; hear your

voice or laugh inside our house.

Dennis: When will you be back from death, daddy?

Dennis: Daddy, please don't break your promise, you told me

tomorrow we would go fishing.

Dennis: I am so excited, I been waiting on us to go fishing long

time now.

Dennis: I can't wait for you to teach me how to catch a fish.

Dennis: What is it like in the place called dead?

Dennis: Do other humans live there?

Dennis: Your so high above in the sky

Dennis: How does it feel to be like a kite flying in the sky?

Dennis: I want to fly too with you in death.

Dennis: Daddy, please talk too me

Dennis: Why are you not talking to me?

Dennis: I love you and I miss you

Dennis: Daddy, please talk too me.

Narrator: Dennis mother name Shelly was standing outside

his bedroom door listening to him, all the time.

Shelly: Dennis, daddy is sleeping baby, that is why he can't hear


Dennis: When will he be home?

Shelly: Soon, one day we will both go and meet him in the magic

land, he is living in now name dead.

Dennis: Why can't I go meet him now.

Shelly: Cause daddy is sleeping and tired.

Dennis:What is that box, daddy was in?

Shelly: It's a special magic box for people gone to visit death.

Dennis: Can I get a number or address for daddy?

Shelly: The only way to talk with people in death is by looking

up in the sky at the stars during the night.

Dennis: Which one of those stars is daddy?

Narrator: Then his mother pointed to the brightest star in the sky,

Dennis while still looking up in the stars.

Dennis: Daddy, I will talk with you tomorrow.

Dennis: Please,don't forget to come

Dennis: If you don't come tomorrow,it would break my heart


Dennis: I love you, can't wait to see you tomorrow.

Narrator: Then his mother begin to cry while Dennis stare in the

sky at the big, bright star.

July 18, 2020 19:52

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Keerththan 😀
05:58 Jul 28, 2020

Beautiful story. I found some grammatical errors which you may find if you proofread once it twice. Except that, wonderful story. It was very sad and lovely. Would you mind reading my story "The secret of power?"


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Mustang Patty
17:29 Jul 25, 2020

Hi there, Great job of presenting the story in the voice of a child, and setting it within the screenplay format. I think the language was spot on for a child. If you went back and read the story out loud to yourself, you would be able to hear how the tense changes. I like to suggest a style guide for these kinds of issues - looking through the rules of grammar seems to help on all levels. Thank you for sharing.


Tyra Johnson
18:58 Jul 29, 2020

yes, thank you, I did notice it now, I didn't read over back my story.


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Batool Hussain
05:24 Jul 21, 2020

Hello! This is a beautiful story with a few errors. Nothing much. For instance; towards the end, you've written "then the mother begin to cry" instead of "then the mother begins to cry" 2. The way you've put forwards Denis' accent, was it intended? Overall, I like your take on the prompt very much! Coincidentally, my story is based off the same prompt. Mind checking it out and sharing your views on it? Thanks.


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Rodrigo Juatco
01:13 Jul 31, 2020

Nice story. Well told.


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22:27 Jul 29, 2020

Interesting story! It was very touching. I love the style you write in. Would you mind reading my stories?


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