Who knew

Good morning Cindy

Good morning boss lady

It looks like a hectic morning from all the customers sitting in the waiting room

Lisa is the owner of the biscuit factory and they are running a very busy shop on a daily basis

Cindy unpack her bag as usual for the past seven years that she is working here

She smiles as she walks to the kitchen to pour a cup of coffee before she starts her day

Admin is a lot of work and today data capturing is on her schedule

Her cellphone rings and she picks It from the desk

"Cindy hello"

This is Nurse Korje

I am with your daughter and she would like to speak to you urgently

What could be so urgent this morning and what is Mary doing at the hospital

A panic instantly overwhelmed her

Mommy, please come to the hospital now! Mary shouted almost hysterically

Cindy places the phone on the desk and a numbness sets in

Lisa walks to the desk and notice the fear on Cindy's face

What is wrong? Are yu not feeling well

It's Mary; she just called me from the hospital

What is she doing at the hospital

I don't know! She just said that I must meet her there

Now go! Why are you still here?

Do you want me to get Dave to take you instead?

No, no! I will be okay to drive

Let me get my bag and go

I will call you when I have more information

Cindy don't know What to think and turns down her radio, hoping she can clear her mind with the silence

Mary was on we way to school after she dropped James at the daycare

She thinks of a moment she had wit her baby son of 3years old in the early morning hours

He could not sleep and woke me up with a kiss

I hope he is doing okay at the new daycare centre as the previous daycare closed due to financial challenges

It is his second week at the new daycare and he seems to be doing okay

Cindy finds a perfect parking and rushes to the main gate of the hospital not knowing what to expect

Mary runs to her as she enters the building and a nurse follows her

Are you the mother of James the three year old boy

Yes I am

Why do you ask?

Please come with me to the office

Cindy cannot feel her legs for a second and she takes a deep breathe as she takes a seat in the small but comfortable office

Mary sits next to her

Someone knocks at the door just as the nurse opens her mouth to speak

"Come in please"

Nurse youbare needed in trauma immediately

I am just busy with a case, il be there in a minute

Sister Strauss shows Evette with an eye sign that the situation changed

She steps outside of the office and returns almost immediately

I am afraid we have disturbing news this morning

Your son James was in a horrible accident and we did everything possible to save him, but unfortunately he passed away a few seconds ago

I am so sorry

Cindy sits like a zombie

She have no strength to speak or breath for that moment

She waits for her to wake up from a sleep, but Mary's voices brings her back to reality

Mommy James is gone

Cindy stares at the sister

James is alive

He is at the daycare and you are all mistaken

I wish we were, but we are not Cindy

He stepped out of the garden into the road and got knocked by a car

He was rushed in by the driver of the vehicle thirty minutes ago

Cindy sits with both her hands folded in her lap; she looks doe at her hands hoping to find an answer

Her tears rolls down her face

She stands up and walks to the door

Please take me to my son

They walks down the cold passage to the trauma where a nurse awaits them

Cindy walks to the small bed and pulls down the white sheet from little James

She places his tiny hand in her two hands and breaks down

Oh God why! Why! Why! Not my baby!

Come fetch me too!

I don't want to live without my son

She sobs over her sons lifeless tiny body

Strauss places her hand on Cindy's shoulder

It is a sad morning for the entire trauma unit

.........days gone by and Cindy has not been to work since that tragic morning

They must prepare for the funeral, but she just don't have any strength left in her

Mary brings her mother a warm cup of tea, but it has been days since Cindy touched any food or beverages

She constantly scroll down videos and pictures of her little baby

She decides to commit suicide to be with her son, yes that is a very good idea!

She browse on her facebook and comes across an organization who offers counselling to trauma cases

She screenshot the number, butbshe already knows that the screenshot will eventually ends up in her deleted box

Later in the evening she sits in her room where the light is turned to dim

Tonight she will have her last sleep and then she will be reunited with her little boy

It's been too long for Cindy that she held her baby

His place is empty and the house is quiet

She notices the screenshot and as she is about to delete the number

She realizes that the number is stuck in her memory

She dials the number and it rings

"Good evening how can we assist"?

Uhmmmm I want to die and I want to die tonight

Okay first tell me is it possible for you to come see me before you die? I would like to talk with you first

Yes I can, but I will not make it through this year

We do not know that; but can I please schedule you for tomorrow morning?

She places her phone on the bedside desk and lies on her back staring at the walls, her eyes moves to every corner of the room almost as if she will see James for one last time time

Cindy did not sleep well and is about to leave for her appointment

"Good morning Cindy"

Please come inside and take a seat

Debit takes a seat opposite Cindy

Tell me why is it that you don't want to live anymore

What happened?

I want to go to my little James

Cindy burst out crying

I don't want to be here anymore!

It is not fair that my son is gone

Oh it hurts so much!

I am so sorry to hear of your son's passing

Would you like to talk about what happened and what led to his passing?

My daughter dropped him at the daycare and minutes later I received a call to be at the hospital, but when I arrived he already passed on

Cindy weeps as Devi holds her hands

How old was James?

He was only three years old!

He still had his whole life ahead and now he is gone

Tell me about James

What kind of hold was he?

He was bubbly and knew how to make me mad, but we adored him

He was our sunshine in the house

I remember last month he was very sick with a fever and had a seizure in my arms

I told God not to take him, that he cannot die in my arms

We took him to the doctor and after a day or two he was his old self again

Wait; you say he had a seizure?

And you asked God not to take him at the time of the seizure

That is correct

Don't you see that God answered your prayers on thst day of his seizure?

Don't you think that God needed him then, but because you asked God not to let him die in your arms has been the reason why God spared him for you a little while longer?

Cindy looks at Devi as if for the very first time things starts to make sense

Her tears rolls down her face as she hold on to David's hands; clinging her hands tight hoping to find more answers

Cindy takes put her phone and opens the gallery

She shows Devi a few video clips of her son and for the first time Cindy is smiling a little

She looks at recent pictures taken with her daughter and James

I feel so much better now and I feel ready for tomorrow and the day after

Lastnight felt like the end and I vowed not to make it through the year, but now I feel different

If we accept situations in our lives then only can the healing starts, but for some it takes longer to accept than others; remember that over the weekend you and your family will be in a storm, but if you believe then you will all make it through the storm, because you have each other during this difficult time

They schedules another follow up and Cindy is on her way home

As Cindy drives back home she smiles, because the dark days seems to be light

The End