Painting a dream

“So, Tom. Don’t you think learning to paint would be fun?" I ask Tom, who I have been trying to get to paint for three years. Or, in Earth time, one hour.

“It is really fun.” I say trying to convince him.

    "I think I might try it." Old Tom says.

    "Alright, bye Tom." I say with a smile and watch him get up and walk away. Still sitting on the bench Tom and I were sitting at I say:

    "Out of paint." And I am back in my house. Twelve O'clock p.m. Only an hour after I went into the painting. It was a wonderful three years of France in that painting and I made many friends.

    I pick up my painting and take it to my art room to hang up. As I step back to make sure it is centered I see Tom still standing where he was when I left.

    My phone rings and I answer: "Hello?"

    "Hi, Finn. How are you holding up?"

    "I'm sorry who is this?"

    "Finn, what do you mean? Are you alright?" I am not sure who this lady is so I hang up.

    I get a new canvas and start on my new painting. I am going to paint Hawaii and add my fiance into it and give it to her as a wedding gift for our wedding in two months. But of course I will still enter my painting and see how Hawaii would be with my fiance, Sarah.

    Three hours later and I'm half done. I decide to take a break and go to lunch at "Ma and Pop's" a burger joint where Sarah and I met. I wish I could call Sarah to come to lunch with me but she is in Romania for her job for two more weeks. I think of her soft Blonde hair and her smile that was so contagious it could make a crying baby smile. The way I feel so happy when I am sitting next to her and how she likes my green sweater on me. She says it feels like she is hugging a cloud.

    "Sir, what would you like?"

    "Right, sorry, I would like a burger, fry and strawberry milkshake please." I tell the waiter.

    I get back to my house and continue to work on my painting and three hours later I am finished. I stare at it for a couple minutes then say the words ``Into paint” with my eyes closed.  I feel and hear nothing then when I open my eyes I am in on a beautiful Hawaii beach.

    I look over and see the painting version of Sarah.  My sarah.  My finance.  When I paint characters I give them memories and a personality.  So when I go up to the painting version of Sarah she’ll know who I am.

    “Hey, babe.” I say.

    “Finn!” She wraps her arms around me.

    “I cannot believe we moved to Hawaii!”

    “Want to go swimming?”  I ask.

    We swim until sunset then walk up to our beach house.  I spent twelve years in Hawaii with Sarah.  We even had kids.  We would sit on our porch drinking our tea and watch our two boys and one little girl running around the beach and life was perfect.  It saddened me when I decided I should probably return to the real world but I knew that I would see real Sarah soon enough and take her to Hawaii for real.

    After I said the words “Out of paint” and returned to my house I looked at the clock and saw that only four hours had passed.  I took my painting of Hawaii and hung it up and then went to bed for the night.  

    When I woke up I thought of what I Had dreamt of last night.  I was painting and Sarah was watching me.  It may seem like a simple dream but to me, painting is a way to escape and Sarah is my whole life, so,painting and having Sarah watch is the best thing in the whole world to me.

    Later that day my brother called me,

    “Hey, Finn.  You okay?”

    “Yea, why wouldn’t I be?”

    “Well, today is the one year anniversary of....you know and your therapist called me and she told me that when she gave you a check up call you hung up on her and claimed you didn’t know who she was.”

    “I’m sorry, I do not know what today is the anniversary of and I don’t have a therapist.”  I say.

    “Finn, not again.  What have you been doing this past week?”

    “Well, I have been painting and I went to Hawaii with Sarah-”  I cut myself off.  No one knows of my paintings and everyone knows Sarah is in Romania.

    “I meant I dreamt I was in Hawaii with Sarah and I have been preparing for her to come back from Romania.”

    My brother sighs, “Finn, Sarah is not in Romania.”

    “Why?  Where is she?”

    “Finn, today is one year of Sarah’s death.”

    “Sa-Sarah isn’t dead.  What are you talking about?”

    “Finn, i’ll be over in one thirty minutes, okay?  Just stay right where you are.”

    I hang up before he has the chance to and throw my phone. Sarah is not dead.  My Sarah is not dead.  She is in Romania for work!  I go back over to my Hawaii painting and say “Into painting” When I am on the beach I run to Sarah but I see her fading away. 

    “Wait! Sarah!  Don’t leave!” I run to her but it feels as if I am running in place. 

    “Please!”  I am sobbing now and my whole painting seems to have faded away. 

    “No! No!  Out of paint!  Out of Paint!”

    I open my eyes and I am back in my living room.  I grab my keys and my jacket and storm out to my car.  I get in and drive to Sarah’s apartment.  As I am driving down my street I see my brother driving towards my house.  We make eye contact and it looks as if he had screamed the word “No” to me.  I continue driving through sobbing eyes and pull into her apartment complex parking lot.  I look over and see her Apartment complex gone as if it burnt down.

    I fall to my knees and sob the word “No.”  I would do anything to run my fingers through her long flowy blonde hair, to hear her laugh or to have her smile and hug me and say I feel like a cloud.  My head starts to pound from sobbing so much and I fall to the group and pass out.

    I wake up in a bed  with my hands and feet tied down.

    “Where am I?”  I say while sweating.

    “Hi, finn.  It’s okay.  We just have to keep you here for a little while.”

    “What No!  Let me go !”

    “Finn, it’s me, your brother.  It’s okay, she is your therapist and she just wants to help.”

    “Finn, can you tell me who Sarah is?”

    “Sarah is my finance and we just got back from Hawaii!”  The therapist looks over to my brother and I hear him whisper “He said he dreamt of being in Hawaii with Sarah then he said she was in Romania for work.”

    “Sarah is in Romania and when she gets back she will get me out of her!” I scream.

    “Okay, finn we are just going to put you to sleep for a while and run some tests, okay?”

    “No! No!”  My brother walks out the door and I look at him with pleading eyes.  He leaves.

    As they give me some kind of medicine I think of Sarah and how she called me babe and how she felt when she laid on top of me while we watched movies.  

    “Sarah, I love you.” I say out loud, and then everything goes black.