Mirror Man

“Can you keep a secret?” The man in the mirror asked me. I nodded my head and his nodded back. I felt the strong belief that I could keep his secret, like a child clutching to the belief of Father Christmas. The old floorboards creaked under my feet as I stepped closer to the mirror. My shaking hands reached out and held the intricate frame. The glass was cold against my forehead. Eyes tightly shut, I avoided looking at him. The man in the mirror never smiled. His anger poured out at me like heat from an open flame. Suddenly, I turned and ran from the room.

I’ll make him happy this time. I have to make him happy. It didn’t work before but this time it will.

Thundering down the hallways I flinched every few steps and kept my head down. Broken mirrors lined the walls, I think I was the one who broke them, but he can still follow after me. The house was full of mirrors because that’s what he wanted. Breathing heavily I sprinted the last few paces to the front door and rammed it open with my shoulder. Leaving the peeling door wide open, I staggered into the overgrown grass that surrounded my home. I gulped in the fresh air like a caffeine addict gulping a cup of coffee.

No mirrors out here. 

A laugh escaped my lips which were beginning to form a smile but stopped. I felt his eyes watching me. My hands trembled as I didn’t feel like I was alone anymore.

I can never be alone. He won’t let me.

I scanned the area, turning on the spot and squinting into the distance. There…what’s that? A light was shining at me. The grass flattened under my boots as I stepped towards the light. I moved closer and the trembling intensified. He’s here. I just know it. Always with me. Always watching. The grass turned to gravel as I made it to the quiet road out front. On the side of the road was an abandoned car. It was old and beaten up with broken windows and missing seats. The light wasn’t as bright anymore; the weakened sun was reflecting on the car’s mirror which was hanging at an odd angle.

There he is. His deep, dark eyes were peering straight at me. My muscles clenched and I was frozen in place. A person captured in a photograph; all there but unable to do anything.

“Can you keep a secret?” He asked again. I nodded harder this time, I felt my whole body move. It’s a secret so nobody can know. I don’t want to know. I felt his anger building up and this time it was like a tsunami wave full of broken debris. With a clenched fist I punched the mirror and enjoyed the pain as little cuts formed in my skin. Groaning, I realised he was still there but just fragmented. I punched him again and this time the whole mirror clattered onto the concrete. Feeling more broken inside of my own head than the mirror on the ground, I stamped my foot on it over and over. It was a satisfying crunch but still, I didn’t smile.

Walking along the side of the road I was like a hyena roaming the desert for prey. I was patient and relished in the journey. I was out and temporarily free. My waiting paid off when I heard a car’s engine coming towards me. For a split second, I thought about how it would feel to step into the road and not stop the car. I threw my head back, looking up at the sky and my arm waved out as if of its own accord. The car pulled over to the side of the road. An elderly woman, who looked like someone’s kind grandmother, was alone in the car. She wore a black shawl draped around her shoulders and her nose was long and pointed like a bird’s beak. It didn’t take long to convince the gullible, kind woman to come “help” me. With a fake smile which I could only hold for about two seconds, I stepped into the passenger seat and directed her to my home.

Cheerfully she babbled on, unaware of the truth. She talked about the weather and she talked about family, she talked about arthritis and she talked about dogs. She asked about my home and the man who’s trapped inside.

“Of course I’ll help you”, she kept cooing and I smiled but only on the inside.

Stepping over the threshold of my home, the old woman followed behind me. I slammed the door shut and leaned against it as if my body had given up supporting itself. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her beady eyes peer around her new surroundings. For the first time, I felt slightly ashamed as I imagined what she thought of my run down, creaky house. Apart from the surprise and disgust in her eyes, she seemed at home here; as if she was a mirror image of the house. Maybe the house had arthritis too as it groaned and trembled with crooked beams.

“Where’s the poor man trapped?” She asked turning her attention back to me.

“Upstairs,” I whispered, my gaze rising to the ceiling, hoping he hadn’t heard us. Suddenly her grandmotherly nature was gone as she became a stern woman on a mission as she turned to climb the staircase. Her foot froze mid-step as she looked into a broken mirror on the wall. My heartbeat pulsed rapidly. What is she going to do when she sees the man in the mirror? What will he do? Maybe he’s hiding and he’ll stay hidden…for now.

“Can you keep a secret?”

“Secrets are just people hiding the truth.” The old woman cryptically replied. I was shocked and secretly pleased that she had heard the man in the mirror too. “Are you hiding something?”

My fingers gripped the bannister like a vice and she could read the fear on my face. I remained silent.

“I guess everyone has something to hide,” she sighed as if she held the weight of all the truth in the world and carried on up the stairs.

There was only one door at the end of the hallway and she didn’t hesitate to open it. I quickly followed her and moved to stand in front of the large ornate mirror. The old woman stood off to the side, confusion wrinkling her forehead.

“Where’s the man who’s hurt? Trapped?” She asked, still looking around the dark corners of the room. I pointed at the mirror.

“You see him, don’t you?” My chest felt lighter as I knew that she couldn’t possibly not see him when he was right there.

“You mean…your reflection?” Her forehead was so wrinkled now it was like a tiny mountain range.

I looked at the man in the mirror and his anger was overwhelming like bees buzzing through my veins.

“NO!” I shouted. “He is the Mirror Man.” I collapsed to the floor. All sense of my surroundings was lost. I lost the old woman. I remember seeing a grey fog, a dark bird and hearing a sharp shrieking. The windows were open and a cold wind caressed my skin but I barely felt it. I didn’t know what was real but it didn’t really matter anyway. Kneeling before the mirror, I looked into the Mirror Man’s eyes.

“Can you keep a secret?” He shook his head with a disappointed look aimed down at me.

“I don’t know your secret”, I screamed back and it felt like my body was going to explode.

The man in the mirror grinned at me. And then I knew.

The secret was me.

He was me.

I am the Mirror Man.