'There is a Tide In Affair of Dogs...'

'THERE IS A TIDE IN AFFAIRS OF DOGS, WHICH TAKEN AT THE FLOOD LEADS ON TO FORTUNE. OMITTED, ALL THE VOYAGE OF THEIR LIVES IS BOUND IN SHALLOWS AND MISERIES.'

The spring settled in for good by the time Barry the Beagle finally realised he was not being appreciated by his people. He endured years of being mistreated, disrespected, poorly fed, talked down to and radiculed, had his feelings hurt too many times to count and decided it was high time to make some changes. Four years is a long time in dog’s calendar.

-There must be a better world out there- kept going through his mind- Anything but this.

At the sight of the first opportunity presenting itself, he hastily shed his worn-out, uncomfortable collar and, no longer a slave, decided to steal away and make his own way in the wide world out there. Barry the Beagle walked away. Sometimes the only way to solve dog’s problems is to leave them be, go someplace new and start over. Some would argue that such retreat is an act of cowardice but one might reply, that it’s the only reasonable approach when all others had failed. Some dreadfully turbulent waters are simply meant to be left behind since not the power to remember but its very opposite, the power to forget proves to often to be a necessary condition for a dog’s existance. There might be no grief like the grief that doesn’t speak, but once the aura of depression and sadness asocciated with such radical transition is lifted, a cause for celebrations and joy arises and great things can be achieved. Barry, with the worries weighting heavily on his mind, walked for the whole of the afternoon, evening, long after midnight it was, when he finally got tired and collapsed somewhere around the city’s dumping grounds. He woke up with a clear mind, despite the overwhelming stench all around him, allowed his nose to guide him towards something, that could pretend to ressemble breakfast and then he walked some more. He was a smart dog. Smart enough to stay off the main roads and not get into any trouble with the humans. ('Dogs at some time are masters of their fates').

For the next five days Barry kept walking straight ahead, as fast and as far away from his old life as he could get. His mind started feeling better too.

-Must be all that fresh air.

With each mile covered, Barry felt more like himself, a very good dog that was never allowed to express himself in an appropriate manner before, now free to come up to the surface for the whole world to see. He didn’t worry about reaching a destination since it could be a long distance from where he was currently at. He was also surprised at how easy it was to find a decent food, once you were off your leash that is.

-So lucky for me humans are so wasteful… You could feed all the strays in the city from these big garbage cans. Especially those close to the big noisy roads with lots of cars driving by.

Barry made a mental note to spread his observations among the dog’s population worldwide. He liked the most the dumpsters behind these donuts high-up in the sky. Always had a sweet tooth, our Barry and there simply was not enough krispy-creams in the entire universe to fully satisfy his desires. After enjoying his freedom for a considerable amount of time, Barry the Beagle felt brand new and ready to start a new chapter in his life. He also realised that as dissapointed as he was in his previous caretakers, he decided not to give up on humans entirely. He felt that he belonged in their world more than anywhere else. And that’s when he found himself at the front gate of the park. He gave the gate a long sniff and was just about to enter, when he felt a tiny cold nose sniffing up his behind.

-Hi there. I’m Larry. You’re new around here, aren’t you? I can show you around, if you want.

-Howdy, Larry. I‘m Barry.

-Gee… It rhymes, get it? Larry – Barry, Barry – Larry. Quite contrary. We should stick together. Where are your humans? And why don’t you wear a collar?

Barry took a long look at Larry and let his nose return the honours.

-He’s all right, he thought to himself.

-I have no humans and I need no collar.

-You’re wrong about that. No collar – no park. No humans – no good. -I’ve managed just fine till now, thank you. - That’s cause you were on the move, weren’t you? If you wanna stick around you’ll need to make some new arrangements… How come you don’t have any humans, with your high breed and stuff…?

-I left them.

-You LEFT THEM ? Larry’s eyes became as big as the saucers.

-They must be going crazy, missing you…

-I doubt it. I don’t miss them. Not one bit. Say… Is there any of these big donut places somewhere around here?

-There is a bakery right down the street. If you stick your head in, looking really confused and pitiful you’re sure to get a decent snack. But you need a collar to do that.

-How come?

-If you don’t have it the humans will make a phone call. To the shelter… And they will come and pick you up along with the banana muffin.

-Oh…

-Now, you wouldn’t like that after all the trouble you took to be free, would you?

No. Barry definitely wouldn’t like that.

-Where can I get a collar?

-From a human. I know just a man. Follow me.

Larry walked up to the far left side of the gate and disappeared in, what Barry was to discover, a large hole in the metal net of the old fence. The view of the inside of the park was obstructed by the abundant bushes and Barry resolved to following his guide with a nose held close to the ground. After walking the entire length of the park they found themselves in front of two brick houses in its far back.

-That’s where Howard lives, Larry announced.

-And who is Howard?

-Howard is a man, whose most likely to put that ring you need so badly around your pretty neck, my friend.

-Keep talking...

-Well, Howard had Batman. Batman died…

-And who was Batman?

-Batman… I knew him well, Barry… A fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy… Batman was a big boxer, just all black he was. Lived a long, happy life. Till he kicked the bucket, two weeks ago. Old age. He saw it coming too… Said his farewells and died in his sleep. But Howard doesn’t do very well by himself. That human is a mess, I tell ya, needs a dog to fix him up again. You two might hit it off very well, I recon... And Batman’s neck was about the same size as yours. So, here’s what you gonna do.

Larry looked straight up into Barry’s eyes for the emphasis, commending his all, undivided attention.

-The most important thing – you gotta stay within his eyesight, no matter what he does or says. He’s gonna try to chase you away, talk about calling the shelter… Then he’ll probably give you some water. And you gotta look very gratefull, needy and helpless. A bit stressed out… That usually works too. Just remember to mantain the eye contact, whenever possible and never, NEVER leave his sight. Depending on how long it’s gonna take – some dog told me he had to wait outside for four days, but I think he’s made it up, everybody knows humans give up within twenty four hours or so – so remember, eye contact… Keep rethinking some sad, sad memories so you’ll look really beat up by life… In a desperate need of a break… And if you notice some things he likes, try to sniff it, but be shy and timid about it, like it’s a piece of steak you know can never be yours to keep. Got it? And don’t make yourself look too comfortable on that porch. You think you can handle all that?

-I can try… Barry was a bit overwhelmed.

-Just play it by ear, you’re gona know what to do once you meet Howard. Let your nose guide you to your bed and breakfast. I’ll come over tomorrow morning to check on you.

-You’re leaving me…?

-It’s for the best. It’s a one – dog job. Just remember, eye contact, timid, pityfull, beat up… Lean and hungry look… I’ll leave my digits, in case you need to find me. Larry left his signature on the side of the bottom step.

-Good luck, body. May the force be with you.

And then he was gone, back into the bushes. Few hours later, Barry was stil waiting. His bottom, timidly rested upon the edge of the lowest step was beginning to suggest that some changes needed to be implemented. He got to his feet, stretched and decided to make a little circle around the building, if only to keep his behind from falling asleep. He kept his nose close to the ground and made his way towards the backyard. Strong presence of another dog was detectable in every element of the explored setting.

-As if Batman was still around… Bit creepy… Must have been a good dog, all the residue suggested. Popular, (there were plenty of traces of visitors), well off, (Barry caught a sniff of buried bones with plenty of flash still attached), and appreciated, (sad air quality all over the place was suggestive of something missing and being graetly missed). Upon a closer inspection, Barry noticed that the back door was half-way open. It was not in his nature to pry and invade while uninvited, but under these nerve-wrecking and possibly, life-altering circumstances the curiosity took the best of him and he ventured inside Howard’s house. The intensity of the dog’s aroma inside made his hair stand on ends and informed all his senses that their peak performance is indespencible. It took a while to shake off a sense of danger and relax enough to be able to move into the kitchen. Plastic dog toys were scattered all over bit dusty floor. In the right corner, beneath large window, two metal bowls were standing, bits of dried kernels, way past their time in one and a shy residue of water in the other. Barry was thinking about how hard it would be to fill this dead dog’s shoes and how lucky Batman must have been, to find a human so generous with his love. He felt just a little pang of jealousy, dissmised it hastily and moved towards the living-room, only to find the very same atmosphere of gloom and deepest despair within its walls. Barry felt as if inhaling all that misery was making him very tired. He was used to open space by now and felt the walls and ceiling closing down on him all around. And then, right there upon Howard’s wooden floor, without any further notice, Barry the Beagle fell asleep.

He felt a loose, soft blanket wrapped around him, when he woke up and found himself laying across a big wooden bed, neatly covered with an paisley-patterned cotton sheets. Barry was in the room he didn’t have a chance to explore yet, probably upstairs bedroom of the caretaker’s house. He gave in to the violent pangs of panic upon realising that he was found out, but it lasted only for a moment. He didn’t detect any sign of danger in the atmosphere of the place and the most prominent emotion Barry was feeling was the one of curiosity. He looked around the empty bedroom, spotted the half-open door and jumped off the bed. Upon exiting the room he found himself standing on top of a tall staircase. He stopped and hesitated whether he should go downstairs, considered his options and begun to make his way down to the lower level. An inviting smell of roasted chicken was tempting to his empty stomach. It must have been almost a day since the last time he remembered eating anything at all. Hesitantly, he approached the kitchen and parked himself on its treshold.

-I surely hope nobody’s looking for you.

The voice startled unexpecting Barry. It was coming from the tall airmchair with its back turned to the entrance of the kitchen and the dog wasn’t sure about its intentions, but bravely decided to give the owner of the voice a good sniff and find out once and for all, if Howard was the human meant to share his life with. Barry the Beagle, trying hard to remember all the advice given by little Larry, approached the airmchair timidly, doing his best to put on appearance of misery, pity and rethinking one of many sad episodes of his past life to give it all the thorough air of authenticity, just as he remembered. The man got up from the chair and walked up straight towards Barry. He was tall, slim, energetic and seemed well-intentioned.

-Hope you’re feeling better by now. Two whole days you were out of it, buddy… Let me take a look at you…

Two days! He lost so much time of his life without even realising it! No wonder he was starving. Howard seemed to understand what the dog’s priorities were at the moment and, with an inviting gesture pointed at the bowl. After generous amount of chicken breasts dissapeared inside Barry’s stomach both specimen walked into the living room next door.

-I was thinking about printing out some fliers in case your owners are looking for you, but then, so far, nobody mentioned anything. And you yourself don’t look lost, more like a runaway, if you ask me.

Howard thought that if a nice dog like that decided to pack it up and go he must have had his reasons. He was feeling terribly lonely since Batman handed in his chips a couple of weeks ago. They were together for sixteen years and he wasn’t thinking about getting a new dog, but now, it seemed to him that having another breathing creature inside his home was making him feel better. It didn’t make him miss Batman any less, but days seemed to make a bit more sense with someone else depending on him for care and nourishment. Besides, the park just wasn't the same without its very own dog on the premises. Howard decided to give Barry a shot. As for the beagle, he got a good feeling about the man and felt at ease in his presence from the start. He wasn’t worrying much, allowing the events to unfold of their own accord, with the full confidance in the direction his fate was taking, without dreading dangers of being sold down the river any time in the near future.