Persuasion

I am a curious skeptic. What this means is that while I am skeptical of a lot of things, I am also curious about the experience. Which is why I agreed to go with my mom when she said she wanted to visit a medium. 

             I had never had a desire to do this before. It isn’t something that even crossed my mind to try. But when my cousin was talking about his experience with it, I could see that my mom was completely enthralled. It didn’t take much to persuade her that what he had experienced was the real deal, and she wanted in.

             I was interested in tagging along because, to be honest, I didn’t know much about my mom, so I thought that this might be a good opportunity to learn some things about her past. I imagined that she was hoping to channel her parents, who died in a fire when she was twelve, and her brother, who committed suicide when he was in his twenties. My mom didn’t talk much about her past, and I assumed that was because there might not have been much that she wanted to talk about. If that had been my experience, I can’t imagine I would have wanted to talk much about it either. However, she did seem to be excited about the thought of getting to hear from them again, even if it was through a third party. I guess when it comes to connecting with loved ones, we can’t be too picky about the mode of communication.

             So off we went. For whatever reason I was a little disappointed when we got to the medium’s house. It looked just like any other house. It was in a nice neighborhood, and it seemed very unassuming. I don’t know what I was expecting. I think I was hoping for something a little more haunting. 

The lady who answered the door made up for whatever I felt the house was missing. She was perhaps the thinnest person I have ever seen, and she seemed to smile at us without blinking. “You must be Linda and Jason,” she said. “Please, come in and have a seat. I’m so glad you could make it.” She was very kind and inviting, which I assume is the same way Hansel and Gretel felt about the which who eventually ended up cooking them both in a stew. 

             “It is so nice to meet the two of you. Will you both be participating today?”

             “Oh, no,” I answered. “I’m just here to support my mom. She’s been wanting to do this for a long time, and I decided I would come along with her.”

             “Oh, that’s nice,” the medium said. “You’re a good son.”

             “Thank you.”

             “You’re welcome. Your grandfather thinks so, too.”

             This through me a little because I have never met either one of my grandfathers. Both of them, along with my mom’s mother, had died before I was born. So the only grandparent I had growing up was my grandmother on my dad’s side. “I’m sorry,” I said. “My who?”

             She looked at my mom and said, “Your dad is with us right now and he wants you both to know just how proud he is of you. He wants me to tell you that you are a great mother and that you have raised a wonderful son.”

             My mom and I looked at each other wide-eyed. She looked to be both speechless and excited. “I… wow,” she said. “Tell him I said thank you.”

             “Of course. He said that he’s always been with you and he’s so proud of what you have done for yourself. You have turned into an amazing woman, and he’s sorry for what you had to go through growing up.”

             My mom was in tears now, quietly taking in what was happening. The medium turned to me, perhaps to give my mom a moment to gather herself, and told me that my grandfather wanted me to know that he is happy to see how strong I can be for the family, and that my sense of humor has the ability to hold everyone together, and that I am constantly making him laugh. This made me feel good.

Then she said, “He is also wanting me to tell you something about a deer. Does that make any sense to you?” The only thing I could think of was a deer that I had hit about a year ago when it ran out in front of me one night on a dark highway. I mentioned that and she smiled and said, “That’s it. He wants me to tell you that he is with the deer and that it is alright. He said that the deer forgives you and that there are no hard feelings.”

“Oh, okay,” I said. “You can communicate with animals, too?” 

“Yes,” she said. “Our spirits have the ability to communicate across species, and the deer wants you to know that he does not blame you for what happened.”

She turned back to my mom because my grandfather had more he wanted to say to her. I knew that was why we were there, but I had a hard time letting go of the deer saying that he forgave me for what happened. I didn’t do anything wrong. He ran out in front of me! My car was totaled because of him, but he’s going to act like it’s my fault and that somehow I’m to blame because he was too stupid to notice my car coming down the road at sixty miles an hour when he decided to cross the street? I don’t mind taking accountability whenever I have made a mistake, but I can’t stand someone deflecting their own blame, especially onto me. I don’t care if it’s a person or an animal, don’t blame me for your mistakes.

The medium was saying some stuff about my grandfather wanted to tell my mom something that he felt like she needed to know and that he never got a chance to tell her when I interrupted. “I’m sorry, but the deer said he doesn’t blame me for what happened?” The medium looked at me and appeared to be a little stunned, as did my mom. I assured them that I would let my grandpa finish saying whatever it was he needed to share with my mom, but first I had to clear something up with the deer. “Is he still there?”

“Um, no. I don’t see him.”

“Could you ask my grandpa to get him, please? Can he hear me? Hey grandpa! Can you please have the deer come back? I’d like to have a quick word with him.” There was silence for a moment, so I asked the medium what was happening. 

“Um… he… went to get the deer, I guess.” 

“Okay, good. Thank you, grandpa!” I looked at both my mom and the medium, gave a reassuring smile and said, “This will only take a minute. I promise.”

I could tell they were a little offput by the distraction. After all, this was about mom, not me, and I fully intended to bring the focus one hundred percent back to her and reconnecting with her parents once I got this little issue with the deer taken care of. In the meantime, though, as we waited for my grandpa to get back with the deer, I decided to try to defuse what had seemed to become somewhat of a tense situation. I think by this point we were all so annoyed with this damn deer for temporarily ruining the moment. 

“Would anyone like to see a magic trick?” I asked.

They both looked at me as if I had just taken off my pants. I couldn’t tell, though, if it was because they were surprised that I knew magic, or that they were surprised that I had the audacity to ask if they would like to see a magic trick.

“No thank you. I’m good,” the medium answered.

My mom responded by whispering, “What is wrong with you?” to me. It was clear that they were shocked by the audacity.

Thankfully, the medium let us know that my grandpa had returned, which was a relief to us all. “And Linda, he’s brought your mother with him!” My mom covered her mouth in surprise and excitement, which was good because it gave me the chance to ask if he had also brought back the deer before she could start asking her mother a bunch of questions. I just wanted to get this mess with the deer over with as quickly as possible so as not to prolong the distraction in my mom’s moment any longer.

She sighed and said, “Yes, the deer is back.”

“Good. Would you please tell him that while I’m sorry he got hurt, it was not my fault that he ran out in front of my car, and that he is the one who should be apologizing to me.”

The medium sat speechless, which was kind of unprofessional in my opinion given what we were paying her to do this for my mom. “Is there a problem?” I asked.

“I’m just waiting for the deer to calm down. He is pretty upset about what is happening right now.”

“He’s upset! That ignorant piece of road venison totaled my car! I had to drive around with duct tape holding up my front end for two weeks. And it kept coming apart, so I had to continue to reapply it, which was a pain in the ass.”

“SO IS GETTING HIT IN THE ASS BY A CAR!!!” She screamed. “Sorry. That was the deer. Not me.”

I looked at my watch and realized that we only had about fifteen minutes left in the hour that we paid for, so I tried to wrap this up so we could at least salvage a few minutes for my mom to have with her parents. “Look,” I said. “All I want is for you, Mr. Deer…”

“It’s Donner,” the medium interrupted.

“What?”

“The deer, he says his name is Donner.”

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” my mom said.

“Fine. Donner, all I want is for you to admit that the whole thing was your fault and to apologize to me and then we can move on.”

There was a long, tense moment of silence. My mom and I were looking at the medium waiting for a response. The medium was staring blankly like a… well… like a deer in headlights. I assumed she was waiting for a response from Donner. Finally, the medium said, “The deer…”

“Donner,” I said, correcting her.

“Yes, Donner, wants to know if he apologizes then can he go?”

“Of course. I just want an apology for what he did to my car. Then he will be able to spend the rest of his afterlife guilt free.”

“Okay, he says he is sorry.”

“Tell him I said thank you.”

“He’s gone.”

“Oh. Well, that’s fine. I’m just glad that we were able to put that behind us and that we can finally get back to why we came here in the first place. Mom, you can go back to talking with Grandpa now.”

“He’s gone, too. And our time is up.”

“Oh…”

The drive back home was quiet. I assumed that my mom was probably pretty overwhelmed with emotions after getting to hear from her parents… well, at least her dad… for the first time after so many years. I don’t know for sure, though, because she hasn’t really talked with me about the visit since it happened. I guess it’s something that she just wants to keep to herself.

             As for me, I went into the whole thing pretty skeptical about what we would encounter. But I have to say, although Donner pissed me off a little by his narcissism, he did convince me that there is an afterlife, and that even the most stubborn of us have the ability to change. I have been persuaded.