Today

I am waiting, but I can’t say what for. Here’s what I can say: there is a monster laying next to me, the monster is waiting too.

Reader, know that you are lucky you don’t know what I do, you are lucky I can’t tell you what will happen until it is happening. I’m sorry I have to keep you in the dark, I wouldn’t if I had been given any other choice; but it’s better this way, believe me.

It’s dark outside but not for much longer, I can tell because of the way the sky is just a little less lightless at it’s edges. Waiting in the dead of night is a very scary thing, specially when a monster is laying next to you, waiting too.

I thought monsters weren’t real, but I can tell that this creature with broken wings and twisted bones is a monster. I can tell, because only monsters can have fangs so long and the eyes of a person.

 “What’s your name?” I ask the monster, because maybe waiting isn’t as unbearable if I know the monster’s name, because maybe monsters aren’t as terrifying when they’re feeling chatty.

“I don’t want to talk”, the monster says.

“I do.” I reply, because I’m more scared of what will happen than I am of the monster; because silence is thick and heavy, thicker when you are waiting for what I am.

“Too bad.”

“How do you think it’ll be?”

“Scary.”

I think it will be scary too, but I don’t say so out loud.

The sun begins to come out, it washes the room in orange light and I wonder how a day so terrible can begin so beautifly, soaked in light and live.

“What’s your name?” I ask the monster.

“I don’t want to say.”

“My name is Julia.”

“I didn’t ask.”

“Too bad.”

The morning begins like any other, the world is still quiet, ignorant of what’s about to happen. For a moment I wonder if this is some messed up dream, if it’s all in my head, and today will be like any other day.

“Monster?”

“Hmm?”

“I am scared too.”

But today isn’t like any other day, today is the day me and a monster wait. Today is the day I write to you, Reader, even if I know no one will ever get to read this, but Reader, waiting is a lot easier when I imagine you’re real.

“We should be friends.” I tell the monster.

“You don’t know my name.”

“That’s ok.”

“What’s the point on being friends?”

“It’ll make waiting a much more pleasant thing.”

“Waiting is very unpleasant”

“Which is why we should be friends.”

Monster become a lot less scary when they are waiting in the same room as you are for the same thing.

“How do we become friends?”, the monster asks.

“What’s your favorite color?”

“You don’t know it.”

“What does that mean?”

“Humans have a terrible eye sight they can see very few colors.”

“My favorite color is yellow”

“I hate yellow.”

“Too bad.”

The Monster is trembling next to me, shaking like a leaf. That’s ok. I’m shaking too.

“I didn’t know monsters existed.”

“They obviously do.”

“No shit.”

“Jack.”

“What?”

“That’s my name, Jack.”

“That’s not a very monstrous name.”

“What does that mean?”

“I don’t know, I thought it would be more biblical or something.”

Outside this room, the world is awake, the sound of people being alive fills the city with a weird sense of nostalgia that I think only I can feel. Maybe Jack can feel it too.

“Where do monsters live?”

“Hmm?”

“Like, do they hide under children’s bed?”

“No, that’s creepy.”

“So where do you live?”

“Forests, sewers, mountains. Basically anywhere where there’s no people. No offense.”

“Non taken.”

Some taken.

Reader I know I sound crazy but I am not. I know what will happen today. I hope I’m wrong.

“Describe it to me.” I say.

“What?”

“Your favorite color. You said I’ve never seen it; describe it to me.”

“It’s lighter than red and darker than white. You can see red, right?”

“Yes.”

“It’s also electric, but like, not in a cold way, electric and warm, like fire. Many flowers have that shade of color in their petals. It’s a happy color, a pretty, happy color.”

“How’s it called?”

“Yellow.”

“Fuck you.”

Jack cracks a smile, I do too, only for a second, only for as long as it takes us to realize that we still have to wait.

“Why do you think we know?” Jack asks.

“I'm not sure, there’s no point in us knowing, there’s nothing we can do.”

“You saw it too, didn’t you? In dreams.”

“Yes.”

“Now that seems pretty biblical to me.”

“Did it speak to you?”

“In dreams?”

“Yeah.”

“Not much. It did tell me it would be much worse if I told anyone.”

“Ignorance is bliss.”

“Agreed.”

“We’re friends, right?” Jack asks.

“Yeah.”

“Can we hold hands? I think it will make us feel better.”

“Alright.”

Jack takes my hand and squeezes, I squeeze back.

Outside, live goes on, as if today was a normal day. It isn’t. But only Jack and I know that.

“It showed you how it would go, right?” I ask Jack.

“It did.”

“How did it tell you to find me?”

“I don’t know. It just did. And when I saw you, I could tell you knew too.”

“I wish I didn’t.”

“I wish I didn’t either.”

Reader, I need you to know this. I would have done something if there had been anything to be done, but I was told what I was told when it had been written in stone. I’m sorry. There’s nothing left to do but wait.

“It’s about time.” Jack says.

“I hope it isn’t too horrible.”

“I hope so too”

The seconds seem to stretch in an attempt to avoid the unavoidable, we’re almost done waiting. Right now I wish I didn’t know what I know, I wish I didn’t have to be waiting. Being ignorant is a mercy I was not allowed.

 At least there’s a friend by my side, waiting too, at least I don’t have to wait alone.

“Jack?”

“Hmm?”

“I’m glad you’re here.”

“Are you ready?”

“No. Are you?”

“No.”

It’s time, waiting is over. At the end of this story the world will end, and only Jack and I know that, now you do too.

“The world is ending”, Jack says.

“Yes, I know.”

Dying isn’t as scary when you’re holding the hand of a friend.