Murderer

Submitted into Contest #42 in response to: Write a story that ends in the past.... view prompt

15 comments

General

Murderer, by Brooke D.


I woke up to my alarm beeping. I turned it off, got up, and walked over to my closet. I got dressed, brushed my teeth, and then walked first to the second floor and woke up Xavier, and then to the third to wake up Xander.

Once they were awake, I was able to go downstairs and start getting their breakfast ready, along with my lunch.

"Xavier! Xander! What kind of cereal do you want?"I called.

"Cinnamon Toast Crunch, duh!"Xavier yelled.

"Fruit Loops please!"Xander screamed. Xander was on the third floor, so he always had to call a bit louder than the rest of us.

I put their cereal bowls down on the table as the boys came running down the stairs, pushing each other along the way.

"Stop horsing around! Your bus will be here in ten,"I stated. The boys nodded and gobbled up their cereal quickly while I made my lunch.

"Where are our backpacks, Dad?"Xander asked. I pointed into the office, and (yet again) the boys pushed and shoved each other to grab their bag first.

"The bus is here!"I yelled. The twins ran into the kitchen, grabbed their lunchboxes and left with a "Bye, Dad!".

I was starting to get sick of this. Every morning, I had to act like I was going to work and send them off to school. But I wasn't. Well, not technically. I was looking for someone. And that someone's name was Analia.

An odd name, the reason why she was Annie everywhere else other than her house and my mind. She was going to be my next wife, hopefully. But she was so hard to find. I had talked to her once, at a coffee shop, and I hadn't heard from her since.

After not hearing from her, I started looking around for her. I found her FaceBook, but it was private. Great! More days of looking for her. 

I walked into the office and logged into my computer. I started looking her up again. This happened every day. I sent the kids off to school, pretended I was going to work, and then continued my search for Analia.

If someone knew I did this, they would probably call me sick, but I had my reasons to find her. They may have been dark reasons,but they were still reasons.

"Analia Pali. Phone number. Address. Nothing! Oh, come on. There's gotta be something,"I stated. I continued my search.

"Analia, Analia, Analia...Where are you, Analia?"I asked no one. I was still researching her name, but found nothing.

"Ugh! Analia, where are you? Analia...Analia..."I cooed. There was no reason. I just needed to say something while searching.

"Do you mean Analia Pali? Your next lover? Or victim?"someone asked. I looked behind me, and there was...No! It couldn't be. How? 

"Fl-fl-fl-flower?"I stuttered. Flower. My dead wife. She clasped her hands together and threw them in front of her, and then let them drop to her sides. That's what she always did. She walked closer to me.

"Yes, it's me, David. I just thought that I would come to visit you,"Flower said. I closed my eyes and let tears fall. I knew what I did was wrong, and she was my wife. 

"I'm hallucinating. What are you? Why are you here?"I asked. Flower smiled and walked even closer to me.

"Does that really matter? I'm back, aren't I? You want that, don't you?"Flower replied. My whole body relaxed then, and I nodded.

Flower walked towards me even closer. She was only a foot away. She smelled like she always did. Roses. Flower was only inches away from my face now. She leaned closer, and kissed me. I smiled. It had been so long since I had kissed her lips. 

I was about to pull away, but Flower pulled me in again and the next thing I knew, I had a sharp pain in my back, and Flower was standing in front of me, waving.

"Bye-bye...Murderer,"Flower stated. She started laughing, and then-




                     10 Years Earlier...




I had just finished going through Flower's phone again. And sure enough, there were more texts between her and that Cliff guy. Talking about when they would meet up again. This had been going on for months now. I was sick of it. So sick that whenever I even heard his name, I was nauseous.

The boys were upstairs in bed, I was at the dining room table, and Flower was reading another book in her chair. I was so angry. She had been cheating on me for so long, and she knew I knew. But she didn't stop. She was villainous. 

I quietly got up from the table and slipped into the kitchen. I walked over to the silverware drawer and pulled out a steak knife. I cut myself a bit on my finger, and I started bleeding. I smiled. This was perfect.

I put two knives in my pocket and then walked into the living room. I turned on the radio, to the slow dance music. I grabbed Flower's hand, and she set her book down to follow me. We slow danced around the living room, her head on my shoulder. I would miss this, but I would not miss her cheating.

We danced for a couple of minutes, and when she kissed me, that was my chance. I kissed her, but also put the steak knife in her back. I let go of her, and stood before her as she dropped to her knees.

"Bye-bye...Cheater,"I said. Flower tried to scream, but there was already another knife in her. She dropped dead. I guess getting even was my God-given talent.

I picked up her body and felt her blood, it was warm and sticky. Disgusting! I picked her up anyways, though, and took her out into the woods in our backyard. I grabbed a shovel from the garage, and, with tears rolling down my face, buried my love.

I felt so horrible, but I knew that it had to be done. I would have to report her missing. Or frame someone. I started sobbing as I finished burying her and walked back into the house.

The boys were still sleeping as I crawled back into bed. Good, that meant that they didn't know what happened.


The. End.

May 17, 2020 17:39

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15 comments

Kathleen March
15:07 May 28, 2020

The narrator's perspective/mood really changes and draws the reader along with it. Good shift, but maybe more subtle a shift would work even better. eg, Not calling the dead wife a cheater, but still letting her know he knows? My biggest question is how he ever got away with the murder?

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20:32 May 28, 2020

Thank you for the tip! For the answer to your question, he buried her, and then framed someone else. That other person was sent to prison, and he had his hands clean. Thank you again and stay safe! -Brooke

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Kathleen March
21:02 May 28, 2020

Planning murders is something I've looked at, but don't feel comfortable doing. It's very complex, and technology now really complicates the scene. Not discouraging you, just expressing my own sense of how I can't - yet - perform the perfect murder.

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21:11 May 28, 2020

Yeah, I understand. I'm like that, too, so I don't think this story is one of my best.

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Kathleen March
21:34 May 28, 2020

So don't be sad, just think of how you can reshape for another prompt or for your larger work!!

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03:09 May 29, 2020

Thank you for the positivity, Kathleen!

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Milani James
22:21 May 26, 2020

Ooh...sweet revenge! Great job! If any of you would be so kind to check out my story too, it would really make my day. Best wishes, Milani :)

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00:52 May 27, 2020

Thank you for the compliment! I will for sure check your stories out! Best wishes and stay safe, Brooke

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Sadia Faisal
15:45 May 25, 2020

nice story, please like my story if you like it and follow me, also send feedback of my story if you would like to

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01:15 May 26, 2020

Thank you! I will definitely check your stories out and follow! Stay safe! -Brooke

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Yoomi Ari
01:29 May 18, 2020

Great job and I appreciate your mums role. Thank you both 🙏 ❤️

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17:46 May 17, 2020

Oh my! This was wonderful!!! Great job! Maybe can you conclude this story in a second story? Just an idea. I loved this story, I got shivers! :) Keep writing. Stay safe!

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17:47 May 17, 2020

Thank you, Avery! I like your idea. If there's a fitting prompt, I'll try it! Stay safe as well.

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17:49 May 17, 2020

Ok cool!! :P

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17:50 May 17, 2020

:)

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