God Only Knows

I opened my eyes. fresh streams were left on my face after the beautiful service. The space around me was glowing now, for we were all connected and singing in beautiful harmony. Above us, the angels drew out the last note of the hymn with their soothing voices. Another perfect service.

Our Father descended the golden throne he sat upon the entire procession. Like a wave of light, He descended on to us, each of us feeling a light kiss upon our heads and warmth in our chests. I felt the connection with Him as soon as He hit me, and I felt everyone else's joy as He came upon them. The very clouds shook as He spoke His final words to us, "I am Pleased with you all."

With that, He ascended once again to the gold throne covered in jewels, not even a trinket in the midst of His Might and Beauty, and dispersed throughout the land. The Seraphim immediately rose to follow Him, the Guardians flew down below us to Earth, and we children returned to our business elsewhere. As I arose, I felt a warm embrace from behind.

"Hello, Brother." Ezekiel chimed as he beamed.

"Another Beautiful Service, I can tell." he remarked as he took in my newly wet cheeks. I had no choice but to shy away slightly. After my toilsome journey in Purgatory, I had recently entered into the Joyous Land of Heaven. As a newcomer returning from a long journey of pain, the sudden open arms and loving welcomes, as well as the sudden introduction to Worship Services, I was soon overwhelmed. Even now, far from my introduction into the family, I was still learning to process it all.

Ezekiel brushed my cheeks with his thumb. "I don't mean to jab. You will get used to it. I promise." he stated, with the confidence of a child promising to obey a basic, yet tempting rule. I couldn't stop myself.

"I love you, Zek."

"I love you too, Jacob."

"Hey! Let's go find Deborah! I think she dispersed into the Field of Flowers."

The Field of Flowers was a vast plain that stretched on for miles. It held lush grass, small pools, and even a few trees.Myself and several of my brothers and sisters loves the peaceful valley, though for different reasons. I enjoyed it because it allowed me to fall into a trance and contemplate the beauty of all things. Deborah liked it because of her specific interest in flowers and their colorful assortments. Zek liked it because he got to splash the others in a nearby pool.

We found Deborah just a few Kilometers into the meadow, picking different colored poppy flowers and arranging them in circles around herself. I walked toward her front, and Ezekiel hugged her from behind.

"Quite a vibrant bunch you've got there, Sister." I remarked.

"They are. Quite a delight to see you two, especially after such a great service." Deborah sat on her knees, a position that allowed her to show off the most subtle aspects of her beauty. She'd never admit it, though. She was much too modest for that.

"We wanted to know if you'd like t-" Zek cut himself off at the request, eyeing something in the distance behind us. Deborah and I looked up and noticed and noticed what looked like a string of gold, held taught over the perimeter of the Field. The other two recognized it quicker than I did.

The Pearly Gates are not as literal as their name implies. I was a little confused myself when I saw them the first time. Rather, they are Saint Peter's thin entrance into Purgatory, where those who have finished their trials, or the lucky few who come straight away, are welcomed by him.

Saint Peter turned behind him to find three pairs of golden-rimmed eyes all set on him. He met ours with soft kindness, although there was a palpable sadness behind them. "Hello, Brothers and Sister. I have returned from Purgatory, although, I have not good news. Three of your would've been brothers have decided to reject our Mighty Father, and I once again had to turn them away. I can only hope they find their way soon before they are forced elsewhere.

At this, I cocked a brow in confusion, and so did the others. Elsewhere? We knew of Heaven, where we were welcomed as the family of God, and got to be with Him forever. We also knew of Purgatory, where we kept certain memories from Earth which were used to

form trials for us to overcome in order to receive God. I held a solid grasp of these three worlds, but elsewhere? "What do you mean, elsewhere?" Deborah asked the question all three of us were thinking.

Peter gave a simple smile that shone with affection. "Sister, my hope is you will never have to know. I can only tell you that I barely managed to escape that place after I betrayed our Lord." he replied with a sigh. With that, the ground around him lit up in a white circle. "It seems as though more souls are waiting at the entrance. Til' we meet again, dear children."

We all waved in response. "I like Saint Peter." Deborah chimed after he was gone. "He is very gentle and kind."

We sat in the Field of Flowers for some time after Saint Peter's departure. While the beauty around us was of great subject, we could not help but think of the 'elsewhere' Saint Peter had warned us of. What could it possibly be? Where could it possibly be?

Suddenly, the sound of bells rang out in the air, and the ground shook with a soft tremble, as if it were a lilipad being pushed by a ripple in a pond. Zek, Deborah and I looked up to see two angels, flapping their wings and singing a mighty ballad. They were dressed in heavy clothes and carried long swords and spears in their hands. Between them, was the Prince of the Hosts, Saint Michael. We all stood up in their presence, marveling at the scene in front of us. After a beat or two, Michael descended to the ground and faced us.

"What brings you here, O defender of the Righteous?" Zek spoke as if he had memorized the lines of an important speech before speaking to an official.

"I am here on account of defending the Righteous, my young friend. I felt a disturbance in the Land of Peace, and I, as well as the other archangels, want to make sure it is not as fearsome as we think."

"Disturbance? Here in Paradise?"

"Oh, no. Never here. I made sure of that. But the border of Purgatory where it meets the earth has gotten more tense, as if those in both lands have encountered more evil.

I could not catch his last word. It sounded as if he diverged into another language when speaking it. I could tell Deborah and Zek had equal trouble processing it.

As he turned to leave, I could hear him mutter under his breath, "Lucifer, Brother, what have you done this time?"

Zek spoke up once again. "Lucifer? Who is that?"

Michael only looked at us with sympathetic compassion."He once was the greatest and most beautiful angel in Heaven. If the Father smiled upon us, He beamed upon Luci. He has become different, now. I hope you all never have to find out how."

With that, Michael and the other angels dispersed. Once again, someone had brought up some part separate from Heaven. First, an elsewhere, and then a whole new angel we had not heard from yet.

"Have you two heard of an angel that God pleased Himself more with than anything else?" I asked my companions.

"I think I remember when He and the angels talked about their brother who outshone the Morning Star itself." Deborah inquired. "They didn't say His name, though. They mentioned he had started a war against God and Heaven in search of something else."

Something else? Against God? The very thought was unimaginable to me.

Zek spoke up next. "How about we go to the pool? We can think it over after we have a nice splash!"

We spent quite some time swimming in a glittering pool. Well, Zek and I did. Deborah sat at the bank, collecting more flowers and attempting to plant them in her hair. I didn't mind. Sometimes I would swim with Ezekiel, like now, or I would rest next to her. I enjoyed both their company equally. However, I kept the question of this 'elsewhere' and, more importantly, this 'Lucifer'.  His name meant 'light bearer', and he was described as God's greatest creation. Surely I would have met him hear in Paradise by now.

I turned behind me to see that Deborah had moved. She had taken a spot farther from the pool, where several roses grew. She had busied herself with a bush of stunning white specimens. Suddenly, the bush burst into flames and roared in a fit of might and power, swirling its surroundings in blood red and snow white. Whereas the bush once stood alone, a figure stood just to its right. They remained surrounded in the white and red light, even as the rest of the land settled.

"Jesus!" Deborah practically leapt into His open arms, while Zek and I ran to meet them.

"Hello. We were just walking along the path when we noticed you three here in the Fields. We thought we'd come join you.

At this, The swirling light took shape of a human figure, one with a head seemingly on fire, and a gold marking of a cross coming down its neck down to its chest and spreading to its shoulders. The Holy Spirit sat down beside us, while Jesus remained in front.

"I can tell something's been puzzling you," Jesus said, eyeing me.

"There is." I started. "Both Saint Peter and Saint Michael have mentioned forces that wish to fight against God. We just want to know, who is Lucifer? If he was God's proudest creation, why haven't any of us met him here in Paradise?"

Jesus and the Holy Spirit looked at each other with a knowing look. "Lucifer was indeed my Father's proudest creation. Both the Spirit and I were there when he was created. However, the pride my Father manifested in bringing him forth manifested in something else."

There it was again. That vagueness. "What did it manifest into?"

Jesus looked at me with love. "To tell you would be to taint your spirit, which cannot be possible in Paradise. All I can say is, he is against my Father, and he is against me. I had to fight him myself in a place elsewhere from here, in order to make sure none of you fought him alone. That is why the Holy Spirit is marked the way he is." Jesus pointed at the Spirit, who nodded in approval.

"How could someone want to turn against the Father? I could not imagine living without him." Deborah responded.

"So is any thought of being separated from Him." Jesus answered. "And Lucifer is so far gone away from God that he had rejected his God-given name. He lives in a way very different from us, and some part of him I can see may wish to return, if that part so be smaller than a mustard seed."

Jesus smiled. "If you three wish, I could take you to my Father and He could explain the story of Lucifer and his followers as best as can be explained.”

We walked the length of the Field, not because we needed to travel to God, but because we wanted to enjoy the scenery, for it was always the highest form of joy to greet the Lord in the best place of serenity. We ended the walk at a small oak tree next to a rock. Deborah seated herself on top the rock, with Zek at her right and I at her left. Jesus sat in the shade of tree, with the Holy Spirit standing between us, off to the right. At that moment, we all closed our eyes, and prayed. Immediately, we were greeted with a small warmth inside in our hearts and outside on our skin. I opened my eyes to see a lion laying next to a lamb, and the Holy Spirit having taken on a radiant glow that surrounded the two. Made sense. The Father, Son and Holy Ghost produced such power and might that it was overwhelming to view them as they truly were all together. As a compromise, they would take on other grand forms as to be beheld by any passerby.

The lamb touchingly laid its head in the lion's mane. At the sight, Deborah inched closer to lay her shoulder by the lion's head, Zek and I following close behind.

"It's good to see you again, Father." Deborah cooed.

"Yeah. We all enjoyed the Service earlier." Zek followed.

I simply smiled. I was not one known for his choice of words. God understood that. He also noticed the lasting imprints of curiousness from our other conversations. "What is troubling you all so?"

"Father, we wanted to ask you. Who is Lucifer? We heard of an angel that you pleased yourself with more than any other. Where is he? Why have we not heard of him?" The questions poured out of us one by one. The lion and lamb smiled together in perfect sync.

"My children, your curiosity is one of your greatest attributes. It is one aspect of each of you that connects you to me. However, I simply can't tell you the specifics of Lucifer's fall. To tell you would be to allow knowledge of such evil into paradise, in which it would be paradise no longer. All that can be said is that his absence is definitely felt by myself and the rest of my children. We can only hope for his decision to once again join us once the two realms of Heaven and Earth have become one."

We sat in silence for a few moments afterward. Then, we talked of the beauty in the fields, the growing friendships we were making with the newest members of the Family. Deborah mentioned lying on the banks of a white beach with the Virgin Mary and discussing the rush of emotion at the latest surge of souls exiting Purgatory and entering Paradise. Once that ended, God rose from His resting place. "It has come time once again for another service. I wish to see your beautiful, shining faces there." And He ascended once again towards His dazzling throne. Jesus arose as a man and embraced each of us before He too ascended.

"We should get ready." Deborah said. "Everyone will be here soon." Suddenly, it began pouring rain. Not a fierce attack that could flood a ravine, but a soft blanket that covered everything in cold dots. Before I knew it, I was laughing. I was bellowing from the deepest part of my soul. My friends were as well. Before we knew it, we were dancing. Flailing our arms, jumping over one another, spinning  with no real rhyme or reason. So this was what the service consisted of today.

We all put aside questions of Lucifer and the elsewhere that we had heard of. In time, maybe we would understand, and we could hope to see him enter Heaven once again, as everyone else wished him to. For now, the Angels, Saints, and Children gathered under the Father's presence, and danced.