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Sad

“Carlos, what are you doing? Come here,” Our mom beckons to him. Carlos is my older brother... let’s just say we are very different people. “Your teacher called and said you broke the rules and when you were told to come back to school you refused.” Mom looks like she would explode Carlos never listens to her and does it anyway, but I don’t get how he always gets away with it. “Mom, Dan dared me to do it and said he would never be my friend if I didn’t. I couldn’t do anything about it,” Carlos wines. He always gets away by saying his best friend Dan manipulates him to do so, but I know that Dan doesn’t because I have seen Carlos manipulate Dan. “I don’t wanna hear it. you always say that Dan made you do it. You know what I don’t think Dan is a good friend if he is doing that to you. I think I need to talk with Dans parents,” she says worryingly. Dan storms out of the room and I think he is the one having the meltdown because Dan is the main reason why he doesn’t get in trouble. Dad just got back from work. “Honey what’s the problem you look stressed,” He says as he slowly kisses Mom. Mom looks at him in the eye trusting him with every strand of her heart. “Carlos got in trouble. This Dan guy that he talks about it seems like he is a bad influence on Carlos,” Mom sighs. “Well we can alway talk to Dans parents to see the big picture,” Dad says as he hugs mom. What surprises me the most is that I was right there and they didn’t see me. Carlos always has problems but how can not be seen standing so close to them in the open. I push the thought from my head and go to my room. I open my door to the familiar sent of perfume and bright purple wallpaper. I grab my iPod, plug in my headphone and blast music. I feel better when I hear music because when I listen to music I don’t feel alone. I get bored after an hour of music and drawing. “CARLOS TIME FOR DINNER!!” Mom yell up to him. “Coming,” Carlos says. I hear his door open and close. I wait a few minutes waiting for them to call me down for dinner but no one does do they even know I exist? Of course they do I’m there second child. I go downstairs feeling each step. I get into the kitchen. three plates set full of food in front of Mom, Dad and Carlos. “uhh I’m still here and will be for a while,” I say. Mom notices me. “ohh Ally I am so sorry I didn’t mean to. What would you like I can make it for you,” she sounds embarrassed, I feel bad for saying anything. “No it’s ok I normally just eat from the fridge at night sorry for causing a problem,” I say but I sound like I am frustrated. Mom doesn’t say anything for a few minutes so I just go back to my room and wait for her to forget anything happened. I stare at my vibrant wall and all I can think about is how someone can forget you that easily. I just can’t shake it. I check the time 11:36pm. I am starving. I thought that her expression meant she was making me dinner, I guess not. I get down stairs as swiftly and silently as I can. I check the fridge for snacks. I don’t know how to cook because they keep forgetting about me. All the snacks in the fridge are all Carlos's favourite. They never ask me what I want. Like they don’t even have a second child they didn’t even get my name right. My name is Jessica not Ally. Tomorrow I am actually going to a school! Mom finally payed for it even if she forgot. People will actually know I exist. With all the people in this city I only know myself. I know myself the most I am my friend. But soon I will have real friends that wanna hang with me I won’t be alone.

The next day

I wake up super early because I am so excited to have a friend and have people know me. I get to school and see all the Amazing kids. They were all sorts of colours, Pink, Purple, Black and Green! No one even glances in my direction. the bell rings and I am awed. This is the most clean beautiful place ever. I get into class, no one even beckons to me. What is the point of this? The school might be beautiful and all but no one even sees me am I invisible? I can’t live to be an invisible person that isn’t protected by anyone. I bet my parents wouldn’t care if I died anyways. They would forget that I’m real or anything would happen. I need a better life. Parents to support me, help me, teach me, protect me and love me ❤️. This is not the world I belong in. It is so depressing to know that your parents forget who you are, knowing that they don’t love you, and knowing you have no role in this world and no one is there for you except for you. So what’s The point of even living. all the thoughts swarms me and tackle my emotions, I start to cry. I am mad at my family for not being there for me I need them to grow older learn stuff like how to grow or live or to prepare me for this time were they’re not there I don’t know how to control myself and my emotions. I started to run, I slam into the door and push myself out of the wonderful school. I run on the street, on the grass, through the woods. I run till my legs give out. I fall to my knees I'm in the middle of nowhere. I am lost. I can’t and won’t go back home to the familiar sent of my perfume. I belong nowhere. I sleep on the ground. I hear wolves howling. I can hear it get louder and louder till I see them. They look hungry. I spring into a solid sprint. I can’t breath how can these wolves see me but no one else? Now that my life is on the line I don’t wanna die I am worthless but it is still very scary to see a pack of wolves chasing me. Leaves and branches scratch my smooth skin and knock me down. I jerk back up and keep running. there’s a cliff ahead can I make it alive. the cliff is coming closer and closer. What is worse. Dying by a pack of wolves slowly or die by jumping of a cliff quickly. I didn’t pick yet it is getting so close. “CLIFF!!!” I scream! But I don’t stop running! I feel the wind brushing against myself. This cliff is far down. I see the wolves, they don’t dare follow me down. my life flashes before my eyes and I feel calm somehow like nothing happened, like I didn’t just run of a ginormous cliff. Everything is bright. I’m a baby again! Well this life whatever it turns out to be I won’t mess it up.

THE END

September 14, 2020 23:33

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1 comment

Louise Muller
22:38 Sep 23, 2020

Hi! I'm Louise from critiques circle. Congrats on your second submission, Monica. It's quite an emotional piece and I can see lots of young readers identifying with it. ❤️

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