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Have you ever had a friend tell you a song is stuck in their head? How bad can it be? You think to yourself. Until one day, it happens to you too. At first, it’s not a problem. When it pops up in your head, you brush it off getting on with what you’re doing. But for days, it continues echoing in your ears, disturbs you while you’re doing any simple task. It pops up when you’re at a job interview, or when you’re trying to fall asleep. For the love of God, you cannot stop hearing it play on loop in your head. It drives you crazy. The people around you think you escaped from some mental asylum from the amount of times you’ve repeated the same melody. Eventually, after a couple of days months, you forget about it and never think about this insignificant incident ever again. 

Not with me though, whenever I think back to this very unfortunate event, I remember that it led me to meet the love of my life a colleague with whom I now make lots of new music, and cannot imagine my life without him. So guys, I guess it’s okay if you fail at something, because something good can come out of it eventually!

… 

‘Aerin, your voice is so beautiful!’

“Haha, thank you!” I replied to the fan’s comment. “You guys are so nice!” I continued reading some comments on the live, and then looked at the camera.

“Do you guys have any song recommendations?” I asked. “I’ve been so busy I haven’t even had time to catch up with the newly released tracks of other artists!” I silently read the fans' responses.

“I’ll make sure to hear all of you guy’s suggestions! You guys will obviously have a great taste in music since you listen to my songs,” I pointed out. Then my stomach growled.

‘Aerin, have you eaten yet?’ A fan asked. 

“No, I’m going to after this live! I should probably end it now, Goodbye!”

…

I walked out of my apartment to the local convenience store. I put in my headphones and searched through a list of songs on my phone. I decided to play some of the songs my fans recommended. I was happy I had finally managed to catch a break from my hectic schedule. I couldn’t help but move in the beat of the songs. Some of them I knew the lyrics to, and it was very hard to try and not sing along. Suddenly I heard an unfamiliar song. I listened curiously. The voice in it did sound a bit familiar, but I couldn’t quite tell who it was. He had a beautiful voice, I thought. When the chorus of the song played, I was so into it I forgot that I was in public and people were probably wondering that the heck was wrong with me. An old lady side eyed me and I quickly stopped moving my head to the beat. I grabbed a pack of instant noodles and a cold drink, and rushed out of the store embarrassed. That song kept playing in my head on my way to my apartment, so I almost lost my way. I slapped my forehead. Focus, Aerin. What’s gotten into you?

Once I finally sat down, I opened a can of soda and started pouring it in a cup. Meanwhile, I searched up the name of the artist of the song that’s been in my head for at least the last hour. When I read the letters on the screen, I froze. The glass of soda overflowed and the drink dripped on the table, and then on the floor. It couldn’t be. The artist of this song was Jeongeun. A rivaling singer, that recently rose in popularity. It’s safe to say that I was the most famous soloist out there, when this dude showed up. Our fandoms have been engaging in many fights about who is the generation’s golden vocalist. Honestly I think this debate is kind of stupid, but he’s been winning many awards that were meant for me. That’s why I worked really hard recently, and prepared the best comeback yet. 

“I’ll show you who’s really the best, Jeongeun!” I yelled punching my fist on the table but immediately regretted it. I held my fist in pain.

“I refuse to listen to any of your songs, you stupid jerk!” I yelled punching the table once again. Damn, maybe I’m the stupid one here after all. But the damage was done. I’m already addicted to this song. His voice is also quite beautiful…

STOP IT AERIN, FORBIDDEN THOUGHTS.

I sighed sitting back down. Then I realised the chair had gotten wet because I spilled my drink earlier.  

“AHHHH IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT JEONGEUN!” I cried pulling my hair. I changed my clothes, dried the table and sat back down to finish my now soggy noodles. Then, exhausted, I lay on my bed and closed my eyes. A moment later, I opened them horrified. No, please not that song again brain. I need to sleep. But my brain had other plans. The tune kept echoing inside my ears. I put a pillow over my head, and kept rolling in bed screaming silently. I haven’t been getting much sleep recently and this was not helping. I picked up my phone and checked the time. 3 AM??? HOW?? 

The next morning when my alarm rang, I opened one eye and stared at the ceiling. My other eye was still closed. Then a melody started playing inside my head. My open eye twitched violently, and I punched my phone across the room in an attempt to turn the alarm off. Damn, I thought. What a great day this is going to be. I sprung up and quickly prepared my morning coffee. I stayed still for a moment, trying to remember something I forgot. I tried really hard, but as a reply my brain started playing a familiar song. WHAT’S WRONG WITH MY BRAIN? I wondered banging my head on the wall. Why won’t this stupid song get out of my mind? It was no use trying to remember, so I gave up. It was probably not important if I forgot it, so it’s okay. I heard my phone ring, and lazily went to pick it up while taking a sip of my coffee. Then I realised it was my manager. Uh oh. 

I cleared my throat and answered. When listening to what he had to say, I almost spit out my coffee. Oh no, I have a photoshoot today, I totally forgot! How am I going to show up with these black circles and this abomination of hair? I chugged my coffee at once, almost choking. Then I ran inside the shower to wash up. I closed my eyes and let the hot water run down my body. I started humming a gentle tune. I continued humming when I got out of the shower, and picked up my hairbrush. I placed it on my hair, and then froze. My eyes widened. 

"THIS DAMN SONG, WHY WON’T IT JUST GET OUT OF MY HEAD??" I yelled while almost slipping on the wet tiles. I caught the handle of the door breaking my fall. Annoyed, I continued brushing my hair in silence, and got ready to leave my apartment. Then I realised that my photoshoot was pushed later in the afternoon. Oh, great. I disturbed my sleep for nothing. I decided to do a live, since I had nothing better to do with my life at that moment. I sat down and turned it on. I waited for a few people to come in, while staring blankly at the screen. 

“Hello everyone!” I said. I tried to hold in my yawn, but I couldn’t help it. 

‘Aerin, are you tired?’ A fan asked. 

“Haha…is it that obvious?”

‘Aerin, you shouldn’t overwork yourself!’

‘I’m sure your new album will be an absolute bop!’ 

‘Yeah, you’re the generation’s golden vocalist!’

‘Yes, unlike that Jeongeun!’

I laughed, but I was dying inside. Why does everyone keep bringing him up? I tried to stop my eye from popping out of the eye socket every time his name was mentioned. After a while of being on the live, I ended up just sitting there doing nothing. I was really tired. I closed my eyes and unconsciously started humming a song quietly. It took me a while to notice that the people in the comments were going crazy. I slowly opened my eyes, and looked at the screen. My eyes widened in shock. 

‘Hey, isn’t that one of Jeongeun’s songs?’

‘Is Aerin a fan of Jeongeun?’

‘But I thought they were rivals?’

‘Maybe they’re secret admirers of each other!’ I let out a gasp of horror, maybe a bit too loud. I laughed awkwardly. 

“Omg, guys! Look at the time! I have to attend my photoshoot now, please look forward to my new album!” I said and turned off the live like the flash. I stayed there contemplating what I should do. Run and hide away in the Amazon rainforest? Maybe fake my death and start a new life? WHY ON EARTH WAS I SINGING HIS SONG AGAIN? What’s wrong with me? I wondered resting my face in my palms. My career, my reputation is ruined, I thought falling onto the couch with a dramatic pose. I could be an actress in a drama, yes, that's it! Ah… what am I thinking? Get up, Aerin. Face the consequences of your dumb decisions. There were still a few hours left for the photoshoot, but I just layed around doing nothing.

I finally decided to take a walk in the park. Maybe the fresh air would lighten my mood.

Jeongeun’s song blasted in my earphones. I was walking in the park but that didn’t stop me from almost falling over and crushing an innocent person walking by. WHY IS THIS SONG STILL IN MY PLAYLIST? I thought desperately trying to remove it. Great. Just when I thought I forgot about it, it’s stuck in my head all over again. I sat down by a fountain with no energy left. Physical or mental. It’s okay, it’s just a song. It doesn’t matter if I listen to it, right?

“WRONG!” I yelled out loud and everyone in the park turned to look at me. Omg… I really want to disappear.

Then I got a call from my manager again. Was I late to the photoshoot? I checked the time panicking. No, there was still an hour left. I picked up.

“Aerin, I have some great news for you!” My manager said. Oh, what could it be? Maybe he’ll give me a day off, maybe I’ll get a raise! 

“Artist Park Jeongeun wants to do a collab with you!” My phone almost dropped inside the fountain. 

“Aerin?” The manager called as he got no reply. 

“Yes… I’m speechless!” I hissed between my teeth, with a big smile that stretched across my face. The corner of my lip twitched and my whole arm was trembling from the urge to punch everything out of existence, including myself. I hung up the phone and stood in a very awkward position, watching the ducks swim by. I kept smiling in a way anyone passing by would think I'm a psychotic cereal killer on the loose.

He probably heard that I was singing his song in my live, I thought. How?? It's only been like two hours... My phone rang again, and I almost threw it in the water instinctively. 

“Aerin,” my manager said displeased. “Why did you hang up?” 

“Ohhh I’m so sorry! The signal was bad.”

“Right, anyway. As I was saying, Jeongeun would like to meet you tomorrow to discuss the details of your track. Please fill me in when that happens so that I can prepare the necessary equipment you might need.”

“Alright, I’ll do that!” I assured. 

The next day, nothing could lift my mood. Wherever I walked, it was like a dark cloud was following me making everyone move away. Good, I didn’t want to talk to anyone. At this point, I didn’t even bother acting shocked whenever that song rang inside my head. I was outside the studio when I saw a tall man with silky black hair. Damn, he looked handsome. 

SHOO, FORBIDDEN THOUGHTS, I thought shaking my head violently. I took a deep breath, I opened the glass door and greeted him.

“Hello, it was Jeongeun, right?” I asked smiling brightly. 

“Yes, and you must be Aerin, nice to meet you!” He said with a gentle voice. I tried not to melt. From anger, of course. This evil man dared to act so innocent and thought I would fall for it, tsk, of course not. 

“Please, have a seat,” he said pulling out a chair.

“Thank you, I mumbled. Why is he so hot? My nose almost bled. Yes, yes. His temperature was quite high. He probably has a fever, he should really go home. Then I can go home too! I thought. I didn’t realise I was actually smiling on the outside.

“You seem happy, are you excited for our collab?”

Huh? What is he talking about? No way he thinks someone would be happy being around him. 

“Oh yes of course! Very much, I’m so excited!” I laughed. Last night, I practiced my fake laugh. I can assure you it now sounds very natural even though I’m dying inside! 

“I heard you’ve listened to my new song, what do you think about it?” He asked.

“Your voice sounds absolutely enchanting,” I replied with no hesitation. “Wait no, I meant-” I tried to save myself but I failed miserably. He laughed. Oh my god, how can his laughter also be attractive? This man is certainly fake. There’s no other explanation. 

“I’m glad you think that,” he said. “I know you’re also preparing a comeback, have you recorded any of the songs yet?”

“Yes, I finished recording the title track and now I’m currently writing the lyrics to the last b-side.”

“Wow, can I listen to it?” No, I thought. Certainly not. Why would my rival be the first one to listen to my song?? But then again, I could show him how much better I am. 

"Sure," I replied smirking. After listening to it, he wore this silly smile on his face like a middle school boy who had his first crush. What a load of crap.

“Wow, I think this song is gonna be stuck in my head for a while,” he declared. 

“HAHA! Getting a taste of your own medicine!” I celebrated.

“Is my song stuck in your head too?” He asked. 

“WAIT I SAID THAT OUT LOUD?” I yelled covering my face in my hands. Dang it, Aerin…

After a while of discussing, we finalised the lyrics of the chorus of our song.

“Wow, that was fast! You’re really good at this,” Jeongeun told me. Of course, you’re looking at the generation’s golden vocalist. What else did you expect?

“Let’s call it a day and continue tomorrow, alright?” I asked ready to go home and take a hot shower. 

“Alright, wanna go get dinner then?” Jeongeun asked. I was petrified. Oh no… the dating rumors that will emerge out of this will be wild. 

“Actually ummm…” I tried to find an excuse but failed again. “Sure!” Here comes the fake laugh. I’ve perfected it, there’s no doubt. 

Me and Jeongeun were eating silently in a small restaurant. Honestly, I expected something more fancy from this dude but this is actually nice. I didn’t care about looking good and just gobbled up my food. When suddenly, that song started playing. I almost choked for the second time in two days. 

“You should eat slower,” Jeongeun said laughing. Would this man stop laughing so often? What’s so funny? Having a song stuck in your head for the next week is certainly not funny. Trust me, I’m speaking from experience. 

A week passed, and still no sign of escape. Our collaboration song was going way too well, that Jeongeun was so excited about it that he insisted we meet every day to work on it. By the seventh day, I was literally a walking dead. I had to work on my upcoming comeback and this. It was exhausting. I could barely keep myself awake. Not to mention that song buzzing in my ears all throughout the day. 

“Aerin, what if in the bridge we put a guitar in the background as well? I think it would sound really nice. Aerin...?” But I was asleep with my head on the table, and drool probably going down my face. 

Next thing I knew, I was in my bed at my apartment. I sprung up immediately. I checked my phone and saw a text from Jeongeun. 

‘You fell asleep so I brought you home, you should take today to rest.’ 

Oh, a rest day! Yay! Though it was embarrassing to think that I got carried home by that dude. But who cares! I started blasting music on full volume. Sometimes I feel bad for my neighbours, but it’s okay, they can deal with it. 

I ordered a pizza and sat on my bed eating. I closed my eyes while the warm cheese melted in my mouth. Ah, finally my well-deserved rest. It’s amazing. When the next song came up, I stayed still for a moment. It was Jeongeun’s song. The little guy in my head controlling my poor nerves and nonexistent brain contemplated what to do. Press the emergency button? Send a fight or flight signal? Scream? Eventually, he came to the conclusion it was best to just give up. I shrugged my shoulders and started singing along. What can I say, it was a good song. And he was one attracti- AHEM talented singer. I meant talented guys. What are you talking about?