The Eulogy

"It was my first year of school in the great state of Texas, I was going to be a third grader. Not that I even kept up with anything that wasn't rolling down grassy hills and running around San Angelo barefooted and in dirty clothes, I was one for the wrestling and playing rough like little boys. My mother had made Texas Leadership Character Academy, or Torture Little Children Academy as I soon had grown to call it, like an adventure and, boy, was I the little girl for that! 

 However, I was woken up a little too early for my liking that morning and forced into an ugly navy blue Polo and the most uncomfortable khaki shorts in order to start the monotony of TLCA's elementary school system. I didn't like my backpack either, it was a clear plastic, devoid of any pink dancing frogs or even one smiling fairy. I probably looked clean for the first time in a while since I'd much rather catch frogs than take a shower; with light brown hair cropped at my shoulders and bored blue eyes. I don't remember if I was nervous or excited, but my confidence soared when, in my row of peers, I saw a cute little boy.

I stood by, listening to their conversation in order to wriggle into it, probably rudely, just to get a chance to talk to the boy with reddish brown hair, freckles, and hazel eyes. I was a sucker for redheads then, and a little boy crazy at that. The moment there was a lag in the string of words flowing out of another boy's mouth, I promptly sat down and pretended to know exactly what they were talking about. I barely paid attention to the other boy's name, Jack, and gladly traded mine with Bradley. I was infatuated and after being friends with Jack and Bradley for a while, I told Bradley that I thought he was cute. Jack thought it was funny to immediately sing a wedding march, rhyming the members of our group's names with a limited vocabulary: "Here comes Josie, eaten by Yoshi!" "Where is Jack? He fell in a crack!"

  Bradley left TLCA after third grade, I made friends with other girls my age, Jack met Nathan, and we all seemed to see less of each other. I moved on from a crush on Bradley, to a crush on my best friend. I constantly asked him who he liked, Jack would say the name of a girl all of the boys liked that year. I finally told Jack that I liked him when we were on the playground, underneath a tunnel that everyone would hide in, and I'm pretty sure he just said: "Okay." and went to play with his friends. At the end of the year, I was having trouble with a few of my friends, I missed Jack because after telling him I thought he was cute and something weird about him having 'old eyes', he wasn't really around anymore. I remember getting really sad and asking to talk to him about wanting to play together. I remember pretending to be penguins with him and the names; Junter, Gunter, Zunter, Hunter, Munter. And we played like that when we were together until I left in 6th grade. 

I had moved to Del Rio, and the details of what I experienced there were only once spoken of to my closest friend, but I still wished, every day that Jack would hold true to his promise that he would date me in the eighth grade. It seemed to be the only thing I would write about, there is an embarrassing amount of stories about meeting and reminiscing with my Jack again. All I wrote about, in order to escape the real world, were love stories and letters to him. My heart longed to be with the one person I felt would love me forever. Even when I was gone for a year, I wrote about Jack. He was the one to rescue me from the brink of death, the one to reunite with me and share a kiss. I really missed him. I really, really did. 

    When I moved back in eighth grade, I was electric, alive, but not the same girl that hugged Jack goodbye. I felt like I wasn't worth the boy I had spent months building up to be a saviour. I was too scared to say hello to him again, when I did, I got a monosyllabic answer. I was hurt, and to hide it, I told him that he needed to cut his hair and walked away. Later in the same year, I sat with him and his friends. We were finally in the same place, but I had moved on to liking someone else. 

 In the beginning of freshman year in high school, I really liked Ryan Brimley. I don't know why, but it lasted around 3 months. I moved to sit with a group of people that treated me poorly, but I was still friends with Jack. In February, I said I wanted a valentine to give me Veggie Straws because I had been craving the taste of them for a while. I said it in passing, never thinking more until Valentine's morning, Jack rushed towards me with an enormous bag of Veggie Straws. I was surprised, and I hadn’t gotten him a gift in exchange! Jack was upset, but I hadn’t caught any hints about this agreement to get each other gifts. I ate the whole bag of chips, and I haven’t eaten any since.

Jack and I have a complicated history of on and off dating, never being in the right time or place, and a love that only close friends can have. He is my everything, my support, my rock of ages. Jackson Palafox is my best friend. I could continue to write millions of little stories that we have shared; like sitting together on the bus ride to San Antonio and falling asleep on the ride back, me daring him to do ridiculous things and him complying, or us sharing food that the other doesn’t want anymore. I’ve lost sight of him a couple times and I’ve taken for granted the support he is to me. I was disappointed that the boy I wrote of, my knight in shining armour, wasn’t there to save me in seventh grade; but he is now. He’s been there to help me in trouble, when I’m on the floor of my closet crying, because the love we share for each other is stronger than any earthly bond. I love him with all my heart, even if he isn’t a current boyfriend that I’ll forget about after highschool, because he is mine. He will always be, above all, my one and only best friend.

As I look back on a decade of friendship, drama, and complete love of a person, I get emotional. We lived through so much together and it’s coming to a fork in the road. Would we have gone down it together? 

Would I have chosen another lifetime spent with the man who always had my back?

   That question was up to us to decide… But I know that if we chose to continue on together, we would always find a way back to the comfort of that eternal love. That's something that will comfort me throughout my lifetime that is going to be spent without him. 

I will love him forever."

End.