Consequences

“When I saw him look at me with lust, I dropped my eyes but, in glancing away from him, I caught sight of myself in the mirror. And I saw myself, suddenly, as he saw me, my pale face, the way the muscles in my neck stuck out like thin wire. I saw how much that cruel necklace became me. And, for the first time in my innocent and confined life, I sensed in myself a potentiality for corruption that took my breath away.”

― Angela Carter, The Bloody Chamber and Other Stories

“We had a deal.”

Those words rang in her head and danced in front of her, the crimson of the ink on the paper taunting her as they sang their melody.

“We had a deal.”

That deal. That cursed deal. Instinctively, she reached for the necklace at her throat and grasped empty air. She swore loudly, then winced as her hand hit her mouth a little too hard in an effort to silence herself. Her fingers fidgeted around her throat, still not comprehending that the necklace was really gone.

But she knew who had it. He had told her he would take it from her, and she should have known better than to believe he would not.

She jumped up and ran to the door of her bedroom. The first light of morning had not broken through her window yet, and she held back another curse as she hit her knee against the wall. Pressing her ear to the wooden door, she listened. Outside, she heard the soft sounds of her mother getting up and preparing breakfast. She would have to sneak out some other way. If her mother caught her, there was no telling if she would ever have a chance to get her necklace back.

Cautiously, she crept over to her window and lifted it. The crisp morning air bit at her exposed skin. She lifted herself onto the windowsill and swung her body forward, catching the branches of one of the trees that grew outside her house, and shimmied down to the ground. Mercy, it was cold. Winter was coming early.

She looked around. Thank goodness it was still early. She jumped up and ran as fast as she could. He would be asleep at this hour, no doubt. Only mothers and stupid girls were awake at this hour. He would be in his huge house, sleeping in his ridiculously huge bed, waiting for his servant to wake him up so he could eat and manage his estate.

He would give it back. Of course he would. That necklace meant nothing to him, thoughit meant everything to her. He didn't even have one. He had never had one, at least not since she had known him. He hadn't lived in the town for very long. Maybe ten years. Maybe 15. No one was too sure. He had just shown up one day with the deeds to the town and made himself right at home. All the girls had commented on how he had no necklace. The men made no such comment, though they fiddled with theirs for the longest time after he walked back into his house, slamming the door with magnificent grace. Since then, he had come out every day, making sure that everyone knew he was present and making sure they spoke to him.

It was not a difficult task, speaking to him. She slowed slightly as she remembered their conversations. They were unlike anything she had ever experienced before. The way he spoke, so fluent in their language, so eloquent, so very calming. He made her – everyone – feel special and magnificent. He always left a conversation right when it had reached a good, comfortable place. Despite this being considered rude, no one questioned him. They simply whispered to themselves about how to steal another moment of his time.

The sun was starting to come up over the horizon. Despite its late arrival, it would make up for lost time by rising quickly and baking the earth. She hurried so the shade of the large canopy he had built for the town would keep her cool.

His house was in the center of the town. Everyone could see it from wherever they were, as he had had it built on top of the hill so they would always remember who ruled them. And now he had something of hers, something that she wanted back. Her fingers clutched madly at her throat again and again as she ran, feeling the phantom necklace bounce on her chest like it used to and jerking her back to reality when she held empty air.

She always forgot how massive his house was. Why did he need it to be that big? He was clearly the richest in the land for miles. But the house was borderline obscene. Strangely, if she were to ask someone to describe it to her, everyone gave a different answer. To her it was three stories high with ornate doors and windows and bright, immaculate paint. Her mother always said it was a "sort of house that makes you think he was a pauper once, what with all the plain furnishings and the simple landscaping. It is large, to be sure, though I think that is more for having enough room for his parties."

There was the sound of someone closing their door, and she glanced over to find the mayor's son walking out into the center of the town. Her heart raced. If he saw her without the necklace, there was no telling how long her secret would stay hidden. She sprinted the last few hundred yards up the hill to the front door and knocked. The strange knocker stared back at her. It was weird that the serpent that hung on his front door was the only detail anyone could agree on. The knocks echoed through the house. She tapped her fingers on her arm impatiently before pounding harder and yelling, "I know you are here! Let me in!"

The door swung open, and he stood in front of her. Momentarily she forgot her anger and took him in. Mercy, he was always so much to take in. The first thing anyone noticed was his eyes. They were so intense she thought he could see into her soul. It should have unnerved her, but it never did. It created a soothing stillness in her that nothing else had before, one that stopped her mind from thinking clearly and her limbs from responding. It was nice, to not have to think so hard or so much.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, his silky-smooth voice creating delicious sensations as they traveled through her. "It's very early. Shouldn't you be getting ready for your day?"

She looked down and realized she hadn't even thought to grab a coat on her mad rush out of her house. She wrapped her arms around herself, her embarrassment returning some of her anger.

"You have it. I know you do. And I want it back."

He looked so confused she momentarily panicked.

"I have what?"

"My necklace! I know you have it. You told me you would take it if I let you. And I did NOT let you! I want it back."

He smiled and opened his arms, taking a step back. “Come in. We can speak more comfortably inside.”

She walked in after him, ignoring the walls and pictures that used to enamor her. He led her like he had the first time, not looking at anything or saying a word to her. He came to a pair of double doors and opened them gently, and she couldn’t help marveling as she always did at how fluid his motions were. He even walked like he was floating.

He had taken her to the drawing room. Well, that was what he called it. She had always referred to it as the library. Bookshelves, reaching from floor to ceiling, lined the room all the way around, only making room for the fireplace in the center of the back wall and the windows along the east wall. Chairs sat throughout the room close to the shelves and the light of the fire and the windows.

“Now,” he said, sitting down in an armchair. “Why don’t you explain to me what it is I have of yours?”

She unfolded her arms and placed them on her hips. “My necklace,” she said, trying to keep her desperation out of her voice. “Please. I know you have it. I need it back. If anyone in this town sees that mine is gone, they will think I’m strange.”

He smiled. “Ah yes, your necklace. I remember it. An exquisite specimen.”

“It looks exactly like everyone else’s,” she snapped.

He laughed. “That proves your youth and your lack of observation. Initially, every one of the necklaces look the same, but there are subtle differences that you would notice if you cared to pay attention. Do you even know what those necklaces are?”

Startled, she took a step back. “I... Of course I do! They represent the part of me that makes me special.”

“They not only represent that, they ​are ​the part of you that makes you special. They are the key, if you will, to what makes you good and pure.”

“I know that! And you have mine and I want it back right now!”

“I’m afraid I cannot do that.”

She felt the air leave her lungs in a rush and she couldn’t figure out how to make them inhale.

“You don’t remember the deal?”

She nodded. “I remember,” she whispered.

“Then you know I can’t give it back.”

“But... Can’t? No, you have to! I need it!”

“Yes, you do need it. Evidently you didn’t want it since you gave it up so easily.”

“I didn’t give it to you. You took it from me. That’s stealing, and I don’t care whether you own this town or not, you do not own me!”

He laughed. “I own everyone in this town, silly girl!” he said, his voice suddenly loud and powerful. She shrank away. “I am the ruler of this place. And when you give me what is most special about you, then you are mine. And I cannot give it back to you. It’s mine now, and you gave it to me willingly. You may not have done it consciously, but my darling,” he stood and placed a hand under her chin, “you gave it to me. And now it and you belong to me.”

She gasped loudly. The room spun.

"Please," she managed to wheeze, "please can I see it one last time?"

He smiled broadly and shook his head. "Wish to say a final goodbye before it’s lost forever? I suppose if you wish, but that’s only going to torture you further."

"I don't care. I want to see it."

He led her out of the sitting room and through the house again. The walls were less ornately decorated, shabbier and older looking. Her skin felt cold, and her heart felt as though something had died. She kept looking over her shoulder to see what was following her, but there was nothing there.

He took her to the back of the house and doors she had never seen before. From within his robes he produced a set of iron keys, each one carved with the head of a dead person she did not recognize. He unlocked the doors and threw them open, pride and admiration etched on every line of his face.

"Behold!" he exclaimed, stepping back and pushing her forward. "My collection! You will know which is yours by the name underneath, as I know you clearly don’t pay attention to yourself enough to know the special thing you have given me."

She stumbled into the room, dazed and sick, and took in the horrid sight. It was nearly identical to the library, but the shelves were not lined with books. All around her hung necklaces. They all seemed identical, exactly as she would expect to see on anyone in this town. She tripped over her own foot and pitched forward. Her hands met glass, and she realized slowly that the necklaces were behind a panel of the clearest glass she had ever seen.

“You have them...”

“Yes, I do,” he said smugly. “The finest prizes should be held in the finest displays, and I have never been one to hold back in showing off my prizes.”

Her fingers stayed lightly on the glass, leaving smudges as she slowly walked past them, searching. Names, written in beautiful handwriting, marked the former owners of each necklace. Her stomach dropped and churned. So many names. So many necklaces.

“Yes, there are a lot,” he said quietly, suddenly standing behind her. “There have been many during the centuries, and there will be more, so many, many more.”

“What happened to them all?” she asked. “There are thousands here. Where are they?”

“Well, some of them have died, of course. And some of them are still alive, but they don’t live here in this town. You see, I have many houses in many towns, and I’m not always here. I have many servants, and they bring me reports daily. And you will now join them.”

Her stomach’s churning became more intense, and she swallowed in an effort to moisten her dry mouth. “What will I become? What will I do?”

He placed both hands on her, gently, softly. His fingers wrapped around her sides.

“You will stay as you are, sweetheart. You will remain the kind, helpful person that you are. You will just be missing something. People will notice eventually. Those who know you best will say something is a bit off about you, and the ones you meet for the first time are

going to describe you as seeming a bit strange. Such is what happens to those who remove a piece of themselves and give it to me.

“As to what you will be doing, that part is simple.” His fingers tightened their grip. “There are many of my servants in this world, but not enough. I need more. And you are going to help me find more. You will go back to your normal life, living it as you always have, but you will return to me every day, reporting what you find. You are going to be looking for those who are weak of mind, heart, and soul, and telling me who they are.”

“Can’t you do that yourself?”

He laughed. “You will begin tomorrow. I’ll give you the day to acclimate to your new surroundings and reality.”

She frowned. “You may have my necklace, but you don’t have me! I do not have to listen to you!”

She cried out as his grip tightened painfully.

“Oh yes you will,” he hissed, “and here’s why. I know you think you can just go back to living your old life without any sort of problem, but you are a stupid girl who does not realize what that necklace is or what it means to lose it. What do you think this town is going to do with you once they realize your necklace is gone?”

A shudder ran through her. Her vision became blurry, and she blinked hard, trying to will her tears away.

“They will hate you,” he continued, “and they will make you an outcast. You will never have a home. You will become friendless, nameless, and hopeless. You gave yourself to me, and I will do with you as I please.

“But I won’t leave you to the world’s devices. I am a kinder master than that. You will be given a fake necklace, one identical to yours. It will only serve as a decoy to fool the rest of the world. You will never be whole again.”

His words sank deep inside of her, and she felt herself hollowing out as they reached every part of her being.

“Now get some rest,” he said, pulling away. “You have a long life ahead of you.”

He left her in that room and closed the doors. Haunted by the sight of all those necklaces, she curled around herself and bit into her skin as she fought back the tears.

“We had a deal.”