Game Night Gone Awry

There they all were...sitting around the table. Her mother, father, and two sets of twin brothers.

It sucks being the middle child. She let out an exasperated sigh.

Sam couldn't decide whether he wanted to conquer Rome or not. It wasn't risky enough. Chris, his twin and partner in the game, argued that Rome was the greatest city ever. Chris argued that it was ruled by a wack-job who stood on his rooftop laughing and giggling like a maniac while his entire city burned.

"Come on already!" Exclaimed Tristan.

"You do that on a weekly basis when you light the stone stove in the backyard to make pizza." Stated Trent, Tristan's twin and the calmer one of the two sets.

This is so annoying. She heard the playing piece think.

Tell me about it. She thought back.

We should conquer Rome! It shouted. It burned, but it conquered so much in so little a time - FOOL! Conquer ROME!

"Sam!" She shouted.

"What?!"

"Even your playing piece wants you to conquer Rome. So just conquer it already and move on."

"There are certain ramifications of conquering Rome! Don't you know your history?"

"Yes...Gosh. If you're not going to conquer Rome, then let me and I'll give you a quick demise!"

"You will not take Rome from me!" He shouted. “BOOM! Conquered Rome! Now what'll you do?"

“Yes! Rome is conquered! Your turn, not twin sis.”

She smiled. “I may have no twin, but I have a power that is completely my own! BAM! EVIL FEMALE DICTATOR! MWAHAHAHAHA!” She swooped in and took Rome from her brother. “BOW BEFORE ME FOOL!”

"Ah, man!" His brother gently punched him. "See what you've done? Her crazy is out now, and she's conquered half the globe!"

"Mwahahahaha!" She cackled. "You will all do my bidding for the rest of the night!"

"But wait!" Tristan shouted, placing one foot on his chair. "My armies will conquer Rome! No female will ever rule manly Rome!" He made to conquer Rome, but was stopped by her vast armies and allies.

"Children..." Interrupted their mother while their father had his head in his hands, trying hard not to laugh out loud.

She stood on her chair. "There is your proof, dear brother!" She gestured toward her playing piece, who was cheering her on. "I conquered Rome! The game is won! Mwahaha!"

"Then I shall defeat this evil female dictator and take Rome for my own!" Tristan shouted.

"Tristan..." Warned his father. “You know what happened last time she conquered and someone tried to overthrow her-“

"Attack!" Tristan leapt towards his only sister and tackled her to the ground, landing on the dogs’ bed.

“I’ll get the first-aid-kit.” Their mother sighed.

"NO!" She laughed. "I have conquered! You shall fear me!" He tickled her. She hit him with the dogs’ squeaky toy. The dog jumped on Tristan to get to the squeaky toy. "Haha! Good dog! Security! Reinforcements!"

"Kids! Remember last time?!" Mother shouted, standing.

***

Their mother shook her head, looking embarrassed as they entered the emergency room for the third time that month. She groaned at the judgmental looks the hospital staff gave her.

“It’s game night!” She shouted. “It gets physical sometimes! It's not my fault!”

“But I conquered!” Chris exclaimed. “You shall do my bidding! Ow!” His twin hit him upside the head.

“We’re back in the hospital because of you, idiot!”

“It’s not my fault we decided to play Dungeons and Dragons! That was Trent’s idea!”

“You didn’t have to bring your armor and weapons into it!”

“It’s Dungeons and Dragons! Armor and weapons come with the territory!”

“You didn’t have to break the TV with your sword!”

“Sis shouldn’t have dodged it then!”

“Don’t blame that on me!” She shouted wiping a small trickle of blood from her mouth. “I suggested we play outside, but no. You wanted to play in the living room!”

“You didn’t have to wear your Xena outfit and distract everyone!”

“It’s all a part of my strategy!” She shouted. “You’re the one that’s dressed like a hung-over wizard!”

“I’m Gandalf the White!”

“He doesn’t wear black!”

“Game night again?” The doctor asked.

“Yes.” Sighed the mother.

“What was it this time?”

“Dungeons and Dragons in the living room…with weapons.” She groaned. “I should really take those away.”

“You shall not have my weapons, woman!” Chris exclaimed, turning to run.

His siblings backed away slightly and smiled.

“How DARE you call your Queen ‘woman’ peasant!” She exclaimed.

Chris winced. “Oops.”

“You shall henceforth be grounded and demoted to kitchen lad for three days and nights!”

“But I won!”

“You insulted the Lady of the House, dear brother.” Trent whispered. “Be grateful you are not demoted to cave dweller.”

Chris groaned. “Please forgive my rudeness, Queen mother!” He bowed.

All through this episode, the doctor was patching everyone up. “You’re free to go now.” He left.

“Your forgiveness is granted…you are still punished, and your victory is exempt! Be grateful your father and King, my husband, is not here with us!”

“Aww, come on mom!”

Bystanders at the hospital were staring at them with curiosity. Some children wanted to go play but their parents wouldn’t let them. It certainly was a sight. A teenager dressed as Xena. A lad dressed in black with a pointy hat. His twin dressed like a Knight of the Round Table. Another dressed as Frodo Baggins. One dressed in multi-colored clothing wearing a platinum wig, and the mother dressed in a flowing gown fit for a Queen of Narnia. They argued for a while longer until security had to gently escort them out, laughing all the while. He was used to this. They come in at least once a month for minor game night injuries. He was invited to their house to see what game night was like so they wouldn't call the cops for child abuse. He walked out of their with a big smile on his face and a bruise on his leg from getting accidentally kicked in a fanatical game of Twister.

***

"Brothers! Unite against the female, our sister!"

The three brothers glanced at each other smiling, then leapt into the fray.

Sam and Chris fought gallantly alongside their sister, for she had conquered them, and the rule states whoever lost rules for one night.

Trent fought with his twin. Their parents just shook their heads, wondering why they even bother with game night if it always ends up like it.

They all rolled around on the ground for a good long while until they were out of breath and the dog stood on top of the pile.

"All hail the leader of Rome!" They laughed, petting the dog.

Give me treats! The dog ordered. And rub my belly!