Dealing with The Devil

I was twelve when I started dabbling in witchcraft. Funnily enough, it’s not very difficult to get into. Especially when your mom works long hours and you’re bored. I started with sprinkling pink Himalayan salt from the cupboard in the doorways, hoping it would keep Mom’s various parade of boyfriends out. They were all shapes, sizes, and colors. And they were always bad news.

     People think that witchy stuff is complicated. To be honest, I’ve made up almost every spell I’ve ever hocus-pocused. Magic is about intent, and the crystals and the herbs and the candles are all about building that intention, not the actual magic. So when I summoned the devil, it was with sidewalk chalk and a peach blossom candle from Bath & Bodyworks. Satan is more desperate than you’d think. He’ll show up for just about anybody these days.

     I coughed and tried to fan the smoke out of my face. “Great. If my room smells like brimstone, Mom’s going to freak,” I grumbled. I stepped back quickly as a pool of shadows gathered on the floor. It swelled and pulsed, and I felt my resolve shrink a bit. I shook it off. Had I wanted to chicken out, now was certainly not the time. 

     It would’ve been too late, anyway. The shadow was stretching upwards, brushing my ceiling. It seemed to solidify, and I steeled myself as a ridiculously tall man stepped from the darkness. I stared up at him, my heart pounding. He flicked some ash off of his jacket and looked down, his eyebrows rising. “A bit young to be summoning Satan, aren’t we?” 

     I glared up at him. “You make deals, don’t you? None of your business if they’re with an eighth grader or not.” Satan clicked his tongue disapprovingly. “Tactless way to open a negotiation, child.” I scoffed. “Because showing up looking like Slenderman is a fantastic start.” “Touché,” the devil huffed. “What do you want?” 

     “I want a house.” I folded my arms as he looked at me incredulously. “A… house?” “Yes, Lucifer. A house. One I own, close to a good college, with a little garden. Make sure no one can take it, and make sure I can kick my mother out of it as soon as possible. I want somewhere I can live for the rest of my life.” 

     He blinked. “I find it hard to believe you’re willing to sell your soul for a place to live. Isn’t that what real estate is for? The housing market is one of my most brilliant inventions. The least you could do is use it.” “Too complicated,” I shrugged. “Easier to go straight to ya, if you ask me.” Satan groaned. “Adolescents. Well, child, here are the terms. You will receive a house, in your name, left to you by some distant relative. Your mother has no claim to it, only as your guardian until you come of age.”

     I stared at him. “And I give you what?” His smile flashed, and I felt sweat beading on my forehead. “Your soul, child. You live happily ever after and when your time comes-” His grin widened. “To Hell you go.” I forced my breathing to slow and straightened my spine. While every neuron in my brain was screaming at me to back out, I knew a devil angry about losing a soul was not something I wanted to face. Granted, if I managed what I had in mind, he would be far, far more angry. Hopefully, by that point, I’d be safe from anything he tried.

    “Alright, Son of The Morning. Let’s see the contract.” I saw a flash of satisfaction in his gaze before he snapped out a long roll of parchment, covered in black print that gradually grew smaller and smaller until it almost trailed away. He handed it to me graciously. I was a smart kid who was reading on a college level, and I was getting a headache. I lazily waved him towards my bed. “Feel free to take a seat. We’re going to be here a while.” 

    Several hours later, Satan was coiled comfortably on my bed while I sat cross-legged on the floor, rubbing my eyes before getting back to reading. My legs were falling asleep, and I was tiring quickly. If I was going to make this work, now was the time. My eyes crawled across the last few words before I straightened, extending my hand. “Pen?” A black ballpoint appeared in the devil’s hand and I accepted it carefully. He glued his attention to me as I hunched over the parchment and avoided his eyes. The second my pen lifted from the paper, he sprang from the bed and snatched it from me, his hand gliding over the second signature line. 

     My panic spiked as Satan’s laugh echoed through my room as the contract disappeared with a flash. “Wise choice, child. I congratulate you on your newfound fortune.” Flame seemed to slither across his smile. “I hope you find our bargain as satisfactory as I will.” And just like that, he was gone.

     Within a week, I got the house. Some old geezer of a third cousin on my dad’s side died, and I was the next of kin. Mom was ecstatic about not paying rent anymore and while she could have used the extra income to actually feed me, she blew it all on a stupid blackjack app. I can’t deny that I wasn’t surprised. My mother had no regard for me, despite my attempts to keep my disgust to a minimum. I preferred to spend as little time with her as possible.

     I fell in love with the place the second I set foot inside. It was a small, old brick house with wallpaper and enormous windows and creaky wooden floors. There was a tiny garden in the back, and there was an herb window in the kitchen and clawed feet on the bathtub. It was perfect, and it was mine.

    Of course, happiness found through the devil doesn’t tend to last. I didn’t expect it to. We’d been in the house for around three weeks when I fell down the stairs. Apparently, it was pretty bad. I broke a couple bones, passed out on the landing, and laid there unconscious until Mom finally came home and got around to calling an ambulance.

     I woke up in the hospital with a massive headache. I barely had time to register where I was before a very familiar laugh rang in the hall and the door swung open. Satan had to duck to enter. He tried to recover from the interruption of his entrance by launching straight into a monologue. Joy.

     “What a pleasant surprise! We meet again! Are you ready, child?” “Ready for what?” I asked, though I knew full well what he was referring to. “To come with me to your new home for the rest of eternity!” His smile now resembled a shark. “After all, a deal’s a deal!” I nodded thoughtfully. “True, Devil. However, I’m afraid I can’t go with you. You see, that would be in direct violation of our contract.” He chuckled indulgently. “And how do you draw that conclusion?” I focused hard and imagined the parchment falling into my hand. I’d never been able to summon things before, but surely there was no time like the present.

     Sure enough, with a flash of purple light, the contract appeared in my hand. The smile dropped from Satan’s face as I unrolled it. “Contract between Lucifer, Son of The Morning, Fallen Angel, and Magdalena Valeria Hernandez. This contract hereby outlines the exchange of the soul in the possession of Ms. Hernandez to that of Lucifer, Son of The Morning.” He waved a hand impatiently. “Yes, yes. I know. What paltry excuse are you hiding behind?” 

    It was my turn for a predatory smile. “You see, Devil, I don’t have a soul in my possession.” I spread my arms. “Feel free to check!” The room was filling with black clouds, probably a sign of Satan’s displeasure. “You jest,” he scowled. “That is impossible.” He grabbed at my heart, freezing when nothing happened. “You see, sir, I can’t give you something I don’t have.” I was smirking openly now. “As there is no soul in my possession, our contract is void. And,” I couldn’t help grinning wider, “I cannot die. I will never see hell. And I know you were hoping that trip down the stairs would take care of me, Fallen One.”

     “Where is it?” He snarled. “An infantile fool should not be able to separate a soul from its vessel, let alone tie it to anything else.” I arched an eyebrow. “Well, it appears this infantile fool has pulled it off. And unless you want me to teach other people how to beat you at your own game, I highly recommend that you agree to leave me alone. I am thirteen and I just achieved immortality, out loopholed the Devil, and taught myself to summon objects about two minutes ago. I’m on my way to becoming the most powerful witch of my age, and you know it.”

     I clapped and the contract I’d drawn up after school on Thursday. “Sign, please. This verifies that we will do each other no harm and make no more bargains, which seems a good idea since we’re both going to be around for awhile. And feel free to read the small print. There isn’t any. I don’t need to hide behind it.” He read it and signed it silently. “You’re worse than that fiddler,” he growled. And then in a flash of red, he was gone.

I smiled. I’d poured my soul into my house with a magic and intention he’d never understand- love.