23 Years

Beep beep beep. I shot out of bed whipping my head all around. Calm down it was just your alarm. Don’t overreact. However, there was no denying that my heart was still racing. As I stood up and went to get dressed, I noticed my sheets were soaked through with sweat. I sighed but moved on with my morning anyway. This was the third time this week that this had happened, so I just started to overlook it. I pulled on some clothes and staggered to the kitchen, still half asleep. As I started making some coffee, I grabbed a bowl of cereal and began eating. 

I was sitting at my kitchen island, scrolling through Facebook when I saw my family. I did a double take as I looked back at the photo. I realized that it was my friend Mindy and her family. Calm down Tess, it’s not them. You left that all in the past. 

I finished my breakfast and headed back upstairs. The past couple of days had been weird. I kept having nightmares and getting terrible sleep, but as soon as I woke up, I couldn't remember anything. I think everyone at work had noticed too because they kept asking me if I was sick. I wasn’t and made sure they knew it, but to be honest, I get why they were asking. If I knew what was wrong I would have said something or at least found a way to deal with it,  but I had nothing to say. I didn’t know what the problem was. 

My mind had been wondering all morning, but nevertheless I finished getting ready for work and headed out the door. I usually bike to the office considering the terrible traffic in Manhattan, but that day it was raining...hard. I decided I would take a cab instead, so I called one over and hopped in. Nothing was out of the ordinary. I texted my boss Sam and told him I might be a few minutes late due to the awful traffic of the city, and then just relaxed. 

I was looking out the window as one does when I saw him. It was my dad. No it can’t be, right? He’s gone. He has to be. Deep down I knew it was him, but I kept pushing that thought even further down. When I looked back, he was gone. He had just disappeared. Okay this is getting out of hand. This can’t keep happening; people will notice and think something wrong with me. Some already are. I made the decision that after work I would go and talk to my friends. They usually knew what to do when it came to this kind of stuff. 

I paid the cab driver and walked into the office. 

“Hey Tessa how’s it going?” asked the secretary, Gina, who was sitting at the front desk. 

I responded, “Oh pretty good. How’s Scooby?”

Scooby was her new puppy dog and was the cutest thing ever. According to Gina, he was also the biggest commitment ever. 

“He’s good. We’re really working on potty training and sitting, and I think he’s getting better. It’s just a slow process.”

“That’s good. You have the patience it takes. Have a good day!”

After my morning conversation with Gina I headed into the office and sat down at my desk. I’m a reporter for “The New Yorker”, and I had a lot to do that day. As much as I love my job, being a reporter in NYC is not as glamorous as it seems. I got to work on the stack of files on my desk that I knew would take me at least all day to get though. 

When I left work at 6:00, it had finally stopped raining. I walked to a nearby Starbucks to finish up some work that I still had left and get a snack. I walked in and there was a short line. As I stood there waiting to order, I saw a familiar person. When they turned around I realized who they were. Mom?! I almost dropped my computer but managed to grab it at the last second. When I looked back up, she was gone. Impossible. There is no way that was her. I must have been someone else. 

“Can I take your order?” The question pulled me back into reality. I ordered a cake pop and a latte. Not the most nutritious dinner, but it would have to do. I sat down with my food and coffee and finished up my work. When I was done, I texted my friend Hannah. Hannah had been my best friend since the eighth grade and I knew I could count on her for anything. She also happened to be a therapist which is always a plus. 

I asked her if she wanted to meet up somewhere, and we made a plan to go to the library. It was our favorite place to go because it was beautiful, quiet, and my personal favorite, free. 

I stood outside and smiled when she came running down the street with her red curls bouncing and her favorite scarf flying behind her. When she saw me she stopped and she got the biggest smile one her face. She waved frantically and started running again, hitting quite a few people on the way. As she raced up the steps to meet me, she tripped and fell into me. We both hit the ground and started laughing hysterically. Around each other, Hannah and I were still just a couple of 13 year olds with a mission to always have a good time. 

We picked ourselves up and headed into the library, snickering along the way. We sat on a couch in the back of the library. Few people ever wondered this far back. This section of the library consisted of old horror books and for some reason, people didn’t seem to have much interest in that, so it was the perfect place for us to talk. After some light chatter, I told her what had been happening. 

“I keep having these messed up dreams that I can't remember,” I said. “I keep waking up all sweaty and freaked out and I can’t figure out why. I also keep seeing my parents.”

When I said that, Hannah’s eyes bulged out of her head. 

“Didn’t they die in that fine when you were like five?” she asked.

“Yeah. that's the thing though,” I responded in a whisper. “They never found their bodies. It took the fire department so long to put it out, they figured they had been burnt to ash.”

“That’s so terrible, but do you think they could be alive? I mean even if they were, why would they just be popping up now? It's been 23 years.”

“All good questions. I have no idea. Right now, I just want to wake up feeling rested.”

My phone buzzed with a weather alert. Apparently, we were supposed to have severe thunderstorms that night. It was late and with the weather coming up Hannah and I decided to say goodnight and talk tomorrow. 

I walked home in need of some fresh air... or whatever the air in NYC is. When I got back to my building and unlocked the door to my apartment, my mouth dropped open. Both of my parents were standing there waiting for me. I wanted to run or hide but at the same time I wanted to hug them as tight as I could; I couldn’t move. I just stood there frozen. After a few minutes my mom said, “We need to talk.”