AN OPEN DOOR

She walked through the dawn on the quiet beach , observing the waves and marveling at the early wakening sounds of the new day.

 She absorbed the breeze and sounds of the waves, she pulled her shawl tighter then released it deciding instead to savor it. 

 Was it not a wonder how the dawn broke into daytime?

Each day was different with its unique surprises and potential.

 She turned to face the surf and looked out to the far horizon, she saw the horizon where earth and sky meet and wondered what type of day it was going to be? Was it going to bring new surprises or was it going to be a day just like any other.

 One thing was certain- It was soon going to be morning and she needed some solitude.

 She was going to her favorite place on the beach- she needed to clear her mind and think it through.

Her decision- right or wrong, timely or untimely.

 She saw the rock and approached it, nestled at the end of the coconut trees at the corner

 It was a big outcrop of rock shaped like a pear, with two smaller boulders in front, she liked to sit on the rock, in its hollow, shielded from view and think.

 It was a refuge , a place of solitude and a place to think.

 She was going back to College

 She was married with grown children

 Her adult life had been spent on raising her children, being a good wife to Bob and building her home.

 Terri Paxton had a new lease of life , her youngest daughter was now a sophomore in college and had left home last year.

 She had been used to the sounds of her children at home for the greater part of their lives and now faced an empty nest.

 She was a Nurse but decided to leave the hectic shift duty of work at the hospital to raise her own family .

 How Ironic? To be going back to College after so many years.

 She loved her girls- but she sometimes felt overwhelmed when they were growing up especially as Bob was usually away as a Marketing salesman for the company he worked .

 She grew into the roles of Mother and competent crisis manager which she did surprisingly well considering the many weeks and months her husband Bob was away at work as a travelling Marketing Manager.

 Oh ! He did well for himself. He rose up the corporate ladder from the entry level position to become the Regional marketing manager of a big five company.

They were comfortable financially and had achieved most of their dreams for the family they wished for during their courtship twenty five years ago.

They had three grown daughters and her youngest Dorothy was now in college.

 But for Terri - Oh well, she had dreams yet to be fulfilled.

 She felt it was time to begin again, after Dorothy left for school and she volunteered her free time at the hospice,

She spent her days helping out by reading stories to the senior inmates and reminiscing with them about the glory days gone by.

She saw their now weary eyes sparkle with life during these sessions- especially when recalling their past achievements and goals attained in their youth. Some were retired former executives who were once household names in their day.

Some shared old photographs and newspaper clippings of events long ago.

These visits to the local hospice had a surprising effect on her which she least expected-It jolted her out of the initial boredom and listlessness of her now empty nest. It made her think about her future- as a person .

And for herself- " This is it! This is my time and chance to make a difference in my life while I am still alive and well."

 She decided to go back to school - Not to go back to being a nurse- no, not after all these years.

 She wanted to chart a new course for herself.

 She wanted to become a Computer Scientist.

 She had been with Dorothy on arrival in college during her Freshman year and saw the younger generation filled with hopes and felt a pang. The fresh faced children who have now become- semi- adults, they think they know what life is all about

 But do they?- Really?

 Why is it that you get to learn- later in life, just what a lovely period of one's life youth is? And how quickly the years go by.

 Well, She told Bob who enthused about it

 He always felt she was happy in the roles she played at home and was glad she wanted more out of life.

 He gave her his full support and offered to pay full Tuition and provided some links to some of the nearby college websites.

 He had a client who was a college professor and asked advice .

 She spoke to him on phone and was motivated to pursue a new career in Computer science.

 She applied for the course and was given admission at the same college Dorothy attended.

 She was yet to tell Dorothy, and her older sisters- Stacey and Rachel.

 And she found herself thinking- I hope my girls don't think I'm insane.

 Not that she needed their approval, because she was doing this for herself, but she felt she would feel better if she could gain their understanding of why she needed to go back to school.

Then the doubts began last night,

Should she really go back to College?- She was forty five years of age.

Could she cope with the demands of College?- Well, she didn't have much to lose anyway.

Could she study and meet the academic requirements? Of this- she had no doubt.

These thoughts mushroomed and grew in her mind till she suddenly caught herself.

No! Terri- you need to clear away these intruding thoughts like cobwebs, make up your mind and move on to the next thing.

 She sat on her favorite rock- to watch the sunrise.

 A new day

 A new door

 A fresh opportunity

 The sun had started making way across the horizon- lighting up the sea with faint streaks.

 And then she laughed out aloud- To herself

 Did the Sun not make its way to shine each new day - Looking the same yet having a unique effect and appearance for each day,

 Yes, each day, there were sunrises and then sunsets- both beautiful to behold and just as fleeting.

 Time was ticking, it waited for no one.

 She would be fifty in the next five years.

 If she goes back to college- she will be fifty years old soon

 If she does not go back to college she will still be fifty soon enough.

 Time waited for no one

 The golden rays of the sunrise had lighted up the beach

 She could see a few Sea gulls making their way on the beach and then flying back to the skies.

 She sighed contentedly. Her resolve was strong.

 I will let the girls know my decision to go to college.

 I wish they will understand me, but even if they don't- I will go back to college.

 I wish to be fifty as a College Graduate in Computer Science.

 She waited for what seemed like eternity, but peace washed over her soul.

 Like the sounds of the waves.

 Her heart beat and her mind steadied and followed the rhythm.

Never fear what is on the other side of her decision.

 The door was open and she was determined to walk through it.