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Crime Suspense Thriller

This story contains sensitive content

*TRIGGER WARNING - MENTIONS OF GUNS, BLOOD, AND DEATH*


 July 4th, 2024. 


Three months ago, they started watching us, specifically watching me. I had assumed they wanted our wealth, but instead, they were after lust and desire. We had no idea until the night they decided to tear our family apart.

We put the girls to bed hours prior, finally relieving ourselves of the day's work. We had a long day of celebration with our family. There was a faint burning smell of sulfur that still lingered in the air. Gabriel had fallen asleep minutes ago as I finished my nightly routine. After getting comfortable in bed, I turned off the light that occupied my side. Seconds later, my desire to sleep was interrupted by many violent, blood-curdling screams that came from down the hall.

Gabriel was faster than I was. He was on his feet and to the safe where we kept the gun before I managed to dial those three digits. I never thought another night like this would come, and I’d have to relive these same moments. Except next time, I would be by myself. 

Gabriel was always this way, protective of his pride. He was always prepared for what could happen. I’ve always admired that about him, especially in situations like this. What more useless could I have been? They were after me after all.  

The screams don’t stop. There’s a clashing noise of various items falling. Gabriel knocks down the door to the girls' room and cocks his shotgun. I immediately rush for Vallery and Kylie, never mind the open window and two strange men in the room. Val and Ky are still screaming and flailing in terror. I gather them both into my arms and barricade us in my bedroom.

I was on the phone with the operator. As I told her my address, there was a booming sound of gunfire that filled our house. It was so loud and distinct; it had to be Gabriel's shotgun. 

Silence then followed. Both girls were crying, breaking down, begging their mom to help their dad. The nine-one-one operator is telling me to stay on the phone, although I can barely make out what she’s saying due to the ringing in my ear caused by the gunfire.

Gabriel finally came to check on us. Terror filled me as I studied his body and saw blood splatter all across his face and clothes, covering almost every inch of his clothing. “The police are on the way.” I rasped over to him. His eyes were wide open and bloodshot. I could tell he was traumatized. I pull both girls in and cover their ears. “What happened?” I said as calmly as I could. 

The shotgun strap falls loosely around his arm, and he sets it down very gently. Gabriel collapses onto the ground and starts to sob uncontrollably. After seconds went by, Gabriel took a breath and raised his head slightly. “I killed him.” He choked out at me. His head falls back down as he continues to sob violently. This was his first time killing a man. 

A realization crept through my head. I only heard one gunshot. If Gabriel only killed one of them, what happened to the other? Where could he be? Better yet, what was their plan? He must have run in horror after watching Gabriel shoot his partner's head off. Hell, I would too. Panic arises and I can't help but to usher each of us outside, away from the horror. I made sure that Vallery and Kylie did not have to see the bloody horror that occupied their room. As we huddle onto the comforting grass, sirens grow loud in the distance, and the night fades into darkness. We did everything we could to forget that night. 


                                                              


October 24th, 2024.


We moved to West Loring Field right after the incident happened. We thought by moving here, all of our troubles would disintegrate, but instead, we met again. 

Gabriel found a house that was significantly cheaper than our current living. Here we were closer to the school, almost walking distance but not quite there. They used to take the bus back at Burton. 

The girls didn’t understand why we had to restart, why we had to move states and start over. We told them it was because daddy got a better job over here and he can see them a lot more. That was true, partially. Gabriel did get a new job, but it wasn’t nearly as close to his previous occupation. He had taken up another position in sales as a field representative, demoting him from district manager back at Burton. It was better this way. He wouldn’t be nearly as busy working and could spend more time with his family, with us. He even agreed he could take the girls trick or treating this week, as Halloween approached very quickly. I praised him for this. I hated how we never saw him, and he was always working, but our troubles and trauma have brought us closer as a family. 

Vallery begged me to be Belle from Beauty and the Beast. Her little sister, Kylie, decided to be a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle, specifically, Donatello. I naturally gave in when I saw their excitement. I ordered them their costumes right away and proceeded to make dinner. 

Everything was fine until that day. 


October 27th, 2024. 


This morning, I received an envelope in the mail containing something odd. It was yellow, wrinkled, and sort of torn at the bottom crevices. Inside was a singular piece of paper: a letter addressed to Gabriel. I quickly sealed the envelope, seeing it was none of my business to know its contents. I put the envelope on the table and left it for him to discover when he came back from work. 

Vallery and Kylie were over the moon to help me carve our jack-o-lanterns. We decided to carve a smiling face on one of the pumpkins, and a scary face on the other. When we finished our cleanup, the girls set the jack-o-lanterns outside. 

During dinnertime, we received a phone call. The clattering of the dishes came to a stop as I got up to answer it. “Hello?” I said, welcoming a response. Nothing. It took them a minute, but eventually, I heard the phone hang up on the other end. 

“Who was it?” Gabriel asks.

“I don’t know,” I pause. I scan the dining room for the yellow envelope. I didn’t see Gabriel pick it up, which means he’s found it. “They didn’t say anything.” I responded. Sitting back in my seat, Gabriel eyed me suspiciously, bringing me more wonder and curiosity about the envelope. 

Every one of us jumps at the booming sound of the stereo playing abruptly in the living area. Suddenly, we all hear, “Guess who’s back, back again? Shady’s back, tell a friend. Guess who’s back, guess who’s back…” The lyrics begin to grow louder as Gabriel jumps from his seat. He slams off the stereo, obviously frustrated from dinner being interrupted for a second time. The girls and I were frozen in our seats. Those words… they meant something. My heart drops as I put the pieces together. Still standing in the living area, Gabriel took a deep breath and sighed loudly. When he came back in he took his dishes and retreated to our bedroom without saying a word. I looked at the girls, who both had worried expressions plastered on their faces. 

I cleaned up dinner and got the girls ready for bed. Gabriel was already snoring by the time I got finished. I couldn’t sleep well that night. I was too busy thinking about the envelope and the song. I did not mention my worries to Gabriel. He’s been stressed since the move and adjusting to his new job, so I let him be. We all needed to rest. 




October 31st, 2024. 


Halloween finally caught up to us. I took Vallery and Kylie to the store with me to pick out the candy I was passing out later. Their tiny hands touch everything we walk by. Kylie was holding one hand on the cart and Vallery was up ahead of us in the aisle. She wove around a bag of lollipops. 

“These are perfect mommy!” She jumps up and down excitedly. Her soft curls bounced up and down. She ran back to us and set the bag in the cart. As we continue our trek, a man with a bulky build slowly emerges from the aisle next to us. His face was kept covered and a small sliver of hair fell out from under his hat. His eyes, the only part of his face I could see, met mine. He felt so familiar. I knew those eyes, where had I seen them before? We stared at each other for at least a minute, or so it felt. He is still blocking the aisle when I break out of my trance. I did not want to frighten the girls, so we bought the candy and left, no mention of the strange man. 

When we got home, the girls hurried to their room to get their costumes on. Vallery needed help getting dressed as Belle. I zip up her dress and fluff her hair. 

“What a beautiful princess!” I rejoice. She giggles and says her thanks. “Go on and show Daddy.” I pat her back and she runs down the hall giggling, her plastic high heels clomping on the hardwood. I look over to Kylie who is already dressed as Donatello. Her mask fully covered her face, and she’s got boots on instead of her sneakers. “Go Ninja, Go Ninja, Go!” I say to her. She knew what I meant and ran down the hallway after Vallery. 

Downstairs, Gabriel stands by Vallery who is fussing to put a jacket on. Unlike Donatello, Belle was wearing a dress in forty-degree weather. He manages to get her to settle down and comply with putting on the jacket. 

“Alright, honey we’re heading out. We won’t be gone too long.” Gabriel says to me. He gives me a quick peck on the cheek, and I give hugs all around. 

“Be safe!” I shout after them. The girls run down the patio and Gabriel struggles to keep up. I watch them go door to door while I’m handing out candy. As they got further, my bowl was emptied and was time for a refill.

I went back inside for a moment to retrieve more candy to give. As I opened the kitchen cupboard and identified candy bag number two, I heard a scattering noise coming from upstairs where the girls' room was. While deciding whether or not to proceed upstairs to investigate the noise, I jumped at the sound of the bell ringing loudly throughout the house. My heart drops as I’m still listening for the scattering noise upstairs. After listening for some time, I dismiss the noise and go back outside to the trick-or-treaters.

“Trick or treat!” Three children say in unison as I open the door. I put two candies into each bag and waved goodbye. More time goes by, and my bowl is once again empty. 

Inside the house, I was met with something terrible. The worn-out yellow envelope that Gabriel had put away reappeared on the kitchen counter, under the cabinet the candy was sitting in. My visions blurs for a moment as confusion wipes over me. I had been the only one inside the house since Gabriel left with the kids, and the envelope was not there before. Curiosity got the best of me and I tore open the seal to the envelope to read the letter inside. It read: “You take my partner, I take yours.” I let out a gasp as everything clicked into place. He has been watching us this whole time! That man has been out there watching us, watching me. He must’ve been the one I ran into at the store. He was right in front of us. I can feel my eyes start to widen. My breath is shaking, and my head starts to spin. Terror washes over me as panic arises. 

A million thoughts start rushing into my head when the catchy tune of Houdini by Eminem clicks on the stereo in the living room. “ABRA-ABRACADABRA (and for my last trick, poof) JUST LIKE THAT AND I’M BACK BRUH!” The lyrics echoed loudly through the house. It was the same song that came on the other night at dinner. Another piece clicked into place. He was back. It had been him. 

If I wasn’t terrified three minutes ago, I surely was now. Frantically, I pick up my phone and immediately dial Gabriel. More scattering noises sound upstairs. Finally, Gabriel answers the phone and greets me. 

“He’s back, he’s back and he’s going to kill me.” I sob through the phone. I tug at the roots of my head and release another violent sob. “Help me, please. I need you to call the police.” I heave. At this point I’m leaning on the kitchen counter, whispering into the phone.

“Wait, Iris, no! Stay on the line with me!” he calls out. I can hear the panic in his voice. He understood what I meant. He knew. “Do you know the safe code?” He says although I can barely hear him. The music is still playing and way too loudly for this occasion. I try my best to gather my thoughts. What was the safe code? Seconds pass and Gabriel wastes no time. “Iris listen to me! The code is thirty-nine eighty-six. Did you get that?” 

“Yes, I got it,” I reply. I repeated the digits slowly in my mind, making sure to remember. Thirty-nine eighty-six. I move swiftly through the kitchen, and into the dining room. I glance up the stairs and listen for a moment. I hear the door at the end of the hallway creak open. Moving faster, I make my way into my bedroom and lock the door behind me. I can now hear footsteps leading down the stairs. Fastening my pace, I go to the closet and open the safe. The gun wasn’t there. The safe wasn’t even locked. He had Gabriel’s gun. “Baby, it’s not here, it’s gone!” I whisper-shout through the phone. The intruder was now downstairs, looking for me. The song replayed one more time, screaming through the house. 

“What do you mean? It sho-” Gabriel shouted before my phone died. PANIC. I search the room, scanning it with my eyes for anything I could use as self-defense. My best option was the lamp at my bedside. I took the shades off and wrapped the cord around my hand. This would have to do. 

The footsteps grow louder and he’s now standing outside the door. There were three knocks before I heard a voice. “Come on out now… I won’t hurt you.” My head was rushing a million thoughts at once. BANG, BANG, BANG! “I said come out!” He growls at me through the door. My heart is racing, and I slowly lose my grip on the lamp. My hands are too sweaty from my nerves. I knew I was no match for this man. I had to run, now

The man was still banging on my door. I ditch my defense plan and make my way to the window. We haven’t opened them since we moved in, so I never knew how much of a challenge opening it would be. I unlocked the window and used most of my strength to pry it open. It budges and squeaks at me. There was another loud bang, and the door slammed open. 

“There you are pretty woman. Did you miss me?” The man bombarded into the room. Blocking any possible exit I had going that way. I let out a terrifying, blood-curdling scream that could be heard from miles away. Not that anyone would help me, it was Halloween and there'd been screaming and laughter all night. 

I keep trying the window. Each time I pull the handles upward, they fall back down with the force of gravity. The man laughs at me as he watches me struggle. Something about him was so malicious. He was out for revenge. I tried the window one more time. 

 Creeeeek. The window screamed at me after managing to pry it open. Quickly, I dove headfirst, falling into the flowerbed surrounding that side of the house. I let out another yelp, this time in pain. I take in a huge breath as I pull myself off of the ground. Mulch stuck to my back like burdock. I pat myself down before I glanced back into the room where the intruder was left behind. He was standing about a foot away from the window, aiming Gabriel’s shotgun at me. After that, I made a break for it. I ran faster than I ever had before. Every boom I heard was urging me on to run faster, knowing he’d missed me shot after shot. I ran and ran until I couldn’t anymore. 

Gabriel found me passed out behind a neighbor's house. He received a phone call from the homeowner explaining that his wife was knocked out in his backyard, maybe under the influence. The police surrounded our home and neighbors and children all gathered to see what the fuss was about. 

Later the next day, Gabriel reassured me that the man was arrested. Although that didn’t get rid of any of the trauma, it certainly put us all at ease. That was until three years later. The song played again and woke us from our sleep.


October 18, 2024 23:24

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1 comment

Carmen Friesen
19:40 Oct 25, 2024

Hi, it's Carmen from your critique circle. Wow, very scary! I loved the way you built up suspense with creepy details like the mysterious envelope and the music playing out of nowhere- I could feel the terror. One suggestion is to pay attention to which tense you're writing in, it keeps switching between past and present tense.

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