HOLY GRAIL

Tatenda looks in the bathroom mirror again. He loves what he's seeing. Since childhood, he had been self-conscious about his smile. His crooked and broken teeth laid siege on his self esteem. This is the first time he has ever felt fully content and satisfied with everything concerning his mouth. Everything about it right now fills him with almost ethereal levels of confidence and satisfaction. The orthodontist did a stellar job. No wonder he’s the best in the whole country. His reputation precedes him and it’s built on solid ground. His website is full of rave reviews from football stars — the foreign based ones who can afford him — diplomats, company executives and government officials. This is not the first time Tatenda has visited an orthodontist or an oral health specialist of any kind for that matter; he has done that numerous times. His teeth have always been problematic; the only area in which genetics did a number on him. His dad flew him to a handful of European countries — France, Spain, Italy, Holland, Germany — to have them fixed and the specialists did their best. But no one did nearly as perfect a job as the last one. Tatenda smiles in the mirror again revealing a perfect set of sparkling teeth that wouldn’t look out of place among Hollywood’s finest. The smile that will immediately grab attention when he appears in the newspapers and on Television after he finally achieves his dream. It's not going to be an easy road, he fully knows this but he has been training hard since he was six years old. He had always wanted to be one thing — an Olympic level athlete. An Olympic long jumper to be precise, inspired by a Carl Lewis documentary that he stumbled upon his dad watching. His dad — a natural believer in people —bought into his vision early on and promised to see to it that he achieved it. His mother didn’t, and even now despite all the medals he has amassed, she still wants him to study Business at an Ivy League institution so that he gets the necessary knowledge and make the necessary connections to take over the family businesses when they retire. He has always been a good student, quite close to gifted even, but school has never been part of his plans. He doesn’t consider the pursuit of academic excellence a worthwhile endeavour. All he wants is to reach the summit of success as a long jumper. At sixteen, his trophy cabinet is already teeming with silverware. Just a few weeks ago, he won the Provincial U-17 long jump competitions beating his rival who has been beating him since they were U-10s. It was one of his proudest moments as a junior long jumper and every day before he retires to bed he kisses his medal and utters these exact words, “In three years, this will be an Olympic medal”

Tatenda admires his ravishing teeth again for at least the seventh time in the last three minutes. He feels a familiar pain in his calves — the favourite part of his body. Well, second favourite now, the orthodontist has seen to it. His calves are the envy of his friends, training partners and rivals alike. They look like they have been carved from living stone; a product of both genetics and intense training. Right now he knows the exact reason why they are sore. It's the intense calf raises and dead lifts. He loves the pain, it's a sign that he's indeed doing what he should be doing. Two days ago, it was the arms that were sore. The weightlifting and varieties of push-ups were doing their work. His new training coach that his dad hired for him — a South African former All-Africa games long jumper — has upped the ante. The work-outs have become more intense and the cardio is pushing him to breaking point. But he loves it; it is all part of the journey to stardom. All his idols went through that, without exception. He takes a quick glance in the mirror for one more time, smiles then heads out to his bedroom.

He looks at the picture of Brazilian football great, Ronaldo, that is on the wall directly opposite his bedroom door. It's a picture of the legendary striker hicelebrating a goal at the 2002 World Cup in Korea-Japan. He's filled with intense emotion every time he looks at it. He loves Ronaldo, everything about him, but especially his comeback story. It's the story that a psychologist — podgy, middle-aged Indian fellow who always had a cigar between his teeth — told him three years ago. He was undergoing rehabilitation after a nasty injury that threatened to put his dream into jeopardy. And it was not a long jump injury for that matter, it was a football injury. His then coach had told him that a football match once a fortnight was excellent cardio and also, ironically, that focussing on different sports reduced the chances of getting injured. So Tatenda would go to the football field every other Saturday with his mates and play for hours.  He loved football and was a pretty good right back — strong and explosive. He saw it coming — the two footed lunge — straight to his knees. He tried to dodge but it was too late. His right knee caught most of the blow. He felt something crack. The pain was excruciating. The panic was even more intense. His dream was done. He couldn’t even cry. He just blacked out. He woke up at home, with his parents on his bedside looking at him intently, gloom pervading their faces, and an impossibly tall doctor talking to them in a solemn tone. He blacked out again and only woke up hours later in the hospital. His whole right leg was numb. His parents delivered the news; he had raptured a tendon in his right knee. Tatenda didn’t know what it meant but he was certain it was catastrophic. He cried the whole night. Sleep would steal him for a few minutes then he would wake up suddenly, shouting frantically. The nightmares were intense. Sometimes panic would seize him suddenly and he would just collapse on the ground and lose consciousness for a while. His parents tried to encourage and console him but their words came across as hollow. They did nothing to comfort him. In fact, all they did was infuriate him even more. The physiotherapist who examined him was a nice looking but matter-of-fact guy. He told Tatenda's parents that they should look at the possibility of him not being able to compete at a high level ever again. He had to be placed on a long-term rehabilitation program. Tatenda was devastated. He lost weight and his panic attacks increased. That’s when the Indian psychologist came in. At first, the psychologist's accent and ramblings annoyed Tatenda but with time he started warming up to the man. He was friendly and knew how to talk to young people; to use their language. And he had lots of interesting stories — fascinating, relatable stories. But it's when he told him the Ronaldo story that something kicked from within him. He felt joined at the hip to the man. The fact that Ronaldo ruptured his knee tendons twice and still returned to the summit of world football in less than three years filled him with so much hope. He was just thirteen. He could wait for three years. He started responding well to treatment and rehabilitation and within nine months, he was back training again. It was going to be a long, arduous journey until he reached peak condition, his coach had warned him, but he wasn’t fazed in the slightest. It was a miracle that he had recovered that quickly and he was going to make the most of it. In four months, he was back to full fitness, at least, according to his physiotherapist. His dad hired another psychologist — the son of a colleague of his — to help him deal with the injury trauma. Though he was fully fit, he was still terrified of getting another injury. The slightest pain in his knee or ankle would send him into panic mode. Tatenda swiftly rejected the new psychologist. He only wanted the Indian. His dad reasoned that there was need for him to deal with different psychologist because they had different strengths and perspectives but Tatenda wasn’t about to listen to that. His dad finally relented and brought back the Indian. His presence calmed Tatenda in a way nothing else did. He taught him how to handle his fears. He told him that his fears and paranoia were legitimate and absolutely normal. He assured him that some of the slight tears and pains he felt in his knee weren’t even real. They were phantom pains, which were due to his brain creating biases because of his injury history. He told him his issues were mental, not physical. He advised him to go to meditation classes and start a hobby that is not physically and mentally demanding. Tatenda chose photography and joined a yoga class which was led by a sweet, elderly Indonesian lady. He would go to yoga classes three times a week and to shooting photos of birds and nature on weekends.  With time, he overcame the mental barrier and started training at full capacity. He was no longer afraid of stretching himself to the fullest. His paranoia was completely gone. A few months later, he won a bronze medal at the Provincial U-15 Athletics competition and it's his most cherished medal — a badge of honour for the intense physical and mental battles he fought and thoroughly conquered.

His Olympic dream is still alive and he loves it. He is still far from the Olympic qualifying mark but he is certain with enough practice, he has a shot at achieving it. At the moment he's not sure if will be able to break the National Junior long jump record. It feels like a tough ask but he will try his best. What he knows is that he will not allow anything to stand in the way of him and Olympic glory. He has already overcome the biggest obstacle — devastating injury, and the subsequent post injury trauma. Nothing else will be insurmountable for him.

His train of thought is disturbed by his mum's impatient, high pitched voice telling him to get ready and to stop dressing like a woman. He smiles as he tries to pick his best suit from his locker and it’s a tough task. His mum is always buying him suits and though he isn’t particularly enamoured with them, he appreciates that she’s a woman of exquisite tastes. He finally settles for a Giorgio Armani double-breasted, two piece suit and Versace velvet loafers. He will be looking pristine at the function. Even the Vice President's daughter will notice him, not that he cares about it. He actually didn’t want to go, there are a lot of deadlifts and skipping rope jumps that need taking care of but he realised his father would be disappointed. It's his big day. Finally he is retiring as Governor after fifteen years. It's the only life Tatenda has ever known. The regular high class functions, the perennially poker-faced men in suits who spoke to his father in hushed tones especially during election season, the numerous fundraising dinners, the urgent late night summons to the President's house and offices, all that stuff, has been Tatenda's normal life since childhood. He hates and loves that life in equal measure. Now his dad is going to become an Ambassador and rumours are that it will be in Canada. Tatenda has always been fascinated by Canada and can’t wait to be based there for the foreseeable future. It would he great for his dream too. His mother calls again, her impatience now almost palpable. He knows the real reason why she is in a hurry. She has a new dress to flaunt. Tatenda admits that it's as elegant a dress as you will ever see but it amuses him how a person with a wardrobe filled to overflowing with exquisite clothing like her wouldn’t get tired of showing off. She will be forty-eight in two months but her almost child-like fascination with new clothes doesn't show signs of waning; not in the slightest. He has to admit there's something almost cute about it though. Tatenda opens his cabinet, kisses his medal and utters the words, “In three years, this will be an Olympic medal” before dashing out of his bedroom and out of the house to his mum, who's already in the car, hooting aggressively.