BOLT AND ZIPPY ON EARTH

My wife asked “What is a spaceport?

“It’s a place where spaceships land and where extraterrestrials arrive from afar.”

“My friend Jane has hosted an alien couple Bolt and Zippy from Zenq who came by a space ship. She says they are very intelligent. They seem to have come with two way translators. What they say is conveyed to us in our vernacular and what we say reaches them in their tongue.”

I said “Zenq must be very far if they had to travel by spaceship. Now that our government has permitted spaceships and extraterrestrials into the country we’re likely to see more such arrivals.”

“Jane says aliens are rich and if they arrive in a large numbers our country may beat the moneyed West.”

“But there is a danger. What if they come with weapons and conquer us?”

The conversation ended.

A couple of days later we were invited to a party at Jane’s flat to meet the couple from Zenq and we went. I was expecting to see aliens with saucer eyes and triangular faces. But the couple looked normal humans. Only Bolt was 7 feet tall and Zippy a foot shorter. He was dressed in a kind of waistcoat over flowered pants. She was in colored pyjamas with a chemise showing every woman’s pride with much cleavage. I couldn’t take my eyes off the spectacle. When introduced Bolt’s grip on my hand felt like a road roller going over it while Zippy’s grip was a bit softer.

I heard Jane wḥisper to my wife “Your hubby is stunned by - you know -her display. So would my husband if he had been here instead of at work in California.”

I averted my gaze.

Jane told us “Zippy can outdo any yoga performer as she has the perfect body and bends.”  Zippy smiled.

I asked “How far is it to Zenq?”

Bold said “Very far. It takes three days travelling at the speed of light.”

I asked “Is this your first trip to India?”

Zippy said “Yes. The first to earth. We have travelled to other planets on our space ship.”

I said “Bolt you’ve seen us and you look like us. Did you find people who look different on other planets?”

Bolt and Zippy now had a private conversation. After that he said “We have been advised not to discuss appearances of people of different places. It is an īntergalactic convention to be followed. I can generally say that there’re many types of people we’ve seen. We can’t reveal further.”

I asked “How do you like it here?”

Bolt said “Still undeveloped place. Communication and movement are so slow. The driver can’t raise the car’s speed due to traffic and people and police on roads. You don’t give cars for self-driving. People at work are slow. We use robots and don’t depend so much on manpower.”

“How long would you be here?”

“Two more weeks. That is the limit the visa is giving us.”

”Who gave you permission to visit in the first place?”

“The government of India, through the Intergalactic Council.”

“How do you find things here?”

Bolt laughed and said “They are a big primitive. Much more automation is needed.”

Jane laughed and said “In fact I offered them the services of my maid but they turned it down. Zippy said they use robots to meet their requirements in Zenq.”

 Jane had arranged for a catering firm to feed the guests. Their man Bahadur was around serving though Bolt and Zippy wouldn’t touch what was served. Suddenly Bolt caught Bahadur by the scruff of the neck and slapped him hard saying “ As we came in I saw you lifting something from the cupboard and hiding it in your turban.” Bolt tore off the man’s turban and brought out a gold chain and a gold ring.

“Get out” shouted Bolt.

Jane said “Bahadur invariably comes to serve when my husband and I arrange parties. I trust him. He has breached the trust. Still I won’t report him to the police.”

Zippy said “If we had been back home and this fellow had stolen from us Bolt would’ve thrashed him without mercy. Jane, Bahadur is your man. Do as you wish.”

I asked “Bolt if I may ask do you have children?”

“Not yet. She has been my wife only three years. If I take Zippy in my arms like this and kiss her this way she would be pregnant. It will happen soon.”

We three laughed at his odd sense of humor.

I said “Bolt you told us your spaceship is in the space port. What will you do if someone steals it”

He laughed and said “It has got a system to electrocute any unauthorized touch. It will be safe.”

I said “Perhaps a short trip in it with you would entertain us.”

Bolt said “That wouldn’t be possible. There is a built in a program about authorized personnel to board the space ship. Only Zippy and I have been cleared to board. In fact I can’t even show you the interior while the vehicle is dormant. Sorry for refusing your request.”

Zippie said “In fact your government asked for a peep inside the space craft but it wasn’t possible. May be in future trips if there is a relaxation of the conditions we will surely take you for a ride.”

Jane said “Zippy, both of you haven’t eaten or drunk anything on offer. Let me at least make some pictures of your visit.”

Bolt said “Sorry even that wouldn’t be possible as we’re photo resistant.”

I said “Let me try.”

I took a few shots but found no picture emerged which surprised me.

Zippy said “We were asked to submit photos for being granted the visa. The Intergalactic Council  had explained the position and your government agreed to grant of visas without photos..”

I looked at my watch and Jane said “Bolt and Zippy please remain here. My friends have to leave.”

We shook hands with the aliens and left. We got into the car and as I drove my wife said “Is it possible that the marks of affection shown by Bolt would produce a baby?”

I said seriously ”I’m sure you would like it that way. And I’m willing to give up our ancient way.”

She said “Don’t. I like your handling me. And he was only probably joking when he demonstrated the way of producing a child.”

“You mean he should’ve done what follows in cases of humans.”

“Certainly not!”

I laughed and said “As more aliens land we’re sure to get to know their secrets. May be it would be possible with some to do without the good old ways.”

“I want the good old ways.”

END