TWO STRANGERS WALK INTO A WEDDING PARTY...

TWO STRANGERS WALK INTO A WEDDING PARTY…..

“Phew, what a relief to be inside! I know this is a happy wedding celebration, but what’s with all the shouting out there? Shouldn’t the action be in here now that the ceremony is over?  I thought I came here for some good cheer (and some fancy food)!”

“Yeah, me, too, dude, what is it that’s happening out there? 

“No idea. And you know what? I don’t really care. I parked in the front but I came in the back way to avoid the crowd. But most of the crowd seems to be out front. I don’t hear any music, so it can’t be street dancing? ”

“I hear you, man. I’m staying put right here where the A/C is. It's been a long week. At least for me. I came to be a guest at a nice social gathering, with minimal shouting. Talking about celebrations, where are those eats and the drinks?  They are usually premium grade at parties like this.  If I know the McEarlies, and I sorta do. There must be 150 hungry thirsty guests here. But right now, they seem to be out there!”

“150, At least. Mostly outside. I don’t even see Justin, the groom, or Jen, the new bride.  This is the first time I’ve been to a wedding party in years. I've been married so long. Our anniversary, our fifth is next month. I can hardly believe it’s been that long.”

“It’s crazy how that happens. You have kids?”

“One of each.  You?  I know it’s a hot day here in Long Beach, and that slight breeze coming in is nice, but maybe we could shut the patio doors to cut down on the shouting out there.” 

“I guess, but those are really just screen doors. You’re gonna still get that sidewalk noise. Yeah, me, too. I have two kids, that is. Twins. The wife and I never even had a wedding party. Nothing like this.  We just snuck away at night and tied the knot. Justice of the Peace style.  Told everybody later. It's worked out. I guess. “

“What worked out? Sorry, it’s so noisy out there. What did you say?  “

“Our marriage. I said OUR MARRIAGE. That worked out. For me, anyway. . You wanna go down and see what all the shouting is about? It’s either that or stand here and shout at each other.”

“No way, let’s wait for it to settle down and they’ll all be back inside.  It’s been a long week at the office for me, too. I worked overtime, for a second week. What I need right now is a cold brew and a few high- end snacks. Let’s go hunt down the party spread. I wouldn’t say no to a lobster roll or a Swedish meatball. “

“Same. I’ll lead the way. No crowds to push through. What do you do?”

“What about my shoe? Is that what you asked? Gee, even with the doors shut, it’s hard to hear. Or maybe I need hearing aids. “

“No, I asked --what do you do?  For a living. You know, to pay the bills. “

“Oh, I'm an attorney. Mostly I handle auto accidents/ injury stuff. It never ends. By the way, the name is Ed. I’m Ed Fulton. What’s your line?”

“What’s my sign? You aren’t into astrology are you? My wife is all over that goofy stuff. She insists on reading me my horoscope at the breakfast table every day. As though I care about that nonsense. Read me the S&P, get real.”

“No, I said what’s your line, you know, your business. It’s hard to pick up every word with the noise out there. I didn’t realize there was another set of doors next to this buffet opening on the street. Oh well, good try. Try these crab cakes, Outstanding.”

“Sure thing, Ed. My name is Jim Jennings. Would you believe it?  I’m in cars, too, so to speak. When things go wrong with their Mercedes sedan or their BMW, they call Jim. I do body shop work, repair stuff.  But mostly on fancier cars.”

“I hear you. We have a lot in common. It’s nice to meet you, Tim. Here’s my card.”

“Thanks.  But No, Ed, it’s Jim, not Tim. With this racket outside, it sounds the same, right? And now I think I think they turned on some overhead music!  Hey, But this squab spread is five star. Perfect time to fill our plates while the other guests are arguing outside.  I still don’t get what’s worth fighting about outside when the groaning board is right here. Try these caviar stuffed mushrooms. And have some champagne.! Let’s live. They didn’t spare any expense. “

“Expense? We’re not paying for any of this are we? These Millennials have weird customs. None of that cash bar nonsense.””

“No, I meant it must have cost the bride and groom a fortune. Or their parents anyway. Hey, Look out the window, Check it out. Looks like a bunch of people gathered on the sidewalk out there. Around a couple of cars.  What do you think we’re missing?!”

“Okay, I guess I'm getting curious, too.I think we are the only ones not out there on the street.  . Let's go take a look. “

“Jeez, Jim, what happened? .It’s a three car pileup. Wait a minute, that’s my Range Rover. What jerk parked like that, Right up on my rear fender. 

I'll kill the SOB with that jeep. Jerk!

“It's me, Ed. That’s my Jeep. But we were both inside; we were not in not in our cars! And I didn't park like that." Neither did you!”

“It's that SUV behind us that is the SOB! He rammed into both of us. Broke your rear axle and flattened my left back tire. “

“That jerk! “

“Wait, Jim, that SUV belongs to the groom. See the tin cans hanging off the back and the garters around the rear view mirror??

“Ed, I think the groom is going to need a lawyer.””

“Jim, I think the groom going to need a good body shop!”

 “Ed, I think I know a good lawyer.”

“And Jim, I think I know a good body shop.”

“High five! ! There is nothing like a wedding party to make a new best friend!”

    *********************************************************

                  *************************************888