New Hair, New Me

I am a different person.  

Today I am no longer the James I was yesterday.  

I repeat this over and over as I walk into the barbershop ready to change things up. Life has always been hard and sometimes precautions need to be taken to ensure my safety and the safety of my loved ones, even if that means killing them and making it all seem like a suicide, then hosting the funeral and crying my eyes out not because I’m sad, but because I finally saved them from this God forsaken world.   

I love my family and if I could talk to them, I would apologise, that I didn’t save them earlier. That my own ego got the best of me. I needed them alive because of my own problems, but that’s the thing, because of me they had to keep living a life of poverty and hatred. But no worries, I came to my senses. They need not suffer on this world because of me. Who do I think I am? 

“What can I do for you today sir?” Smiled a kind looking hairdresser. He had short curly hair and his blue eyes took my breath away. He was beautiful. 

Something you must know about me; I fall in love with absolutely anyone. It’s not my fault, I’m just the biggest romantic. Ready for the perfect love story. Sadly, that hasn’t always worked in my favour. 

“I…I would like a haircut.” I smile and add a little lip bite at the end. He smirks. 

“Very well.” He says looking straight into my eyes. “Follow me!” Your wish is my command.  

I follow the most handsome person alive. Ready to go down a road of adventure and maybe even death to protect him. He motions to a chair and I take my seat. I haven’t broken eye contact since I sat on the chair. He works his way around the salon with a smooth flow, like he is the liquid and I am a solid. 

“How would you like your hair cut today?” He smiles. He is magnificent when he smiles. Derek, I notice on his badge. Derek. I like Derek.  

“Let’s do something different. I want a buzzcut, but not too short. Then we’ll bleach it and…dye it blue.” My face serious until I look at him. We both smile and start to laugh.  

“You really had that whole thing planned out, huh? You sure that’s what you want?” He asks, while playing with my hair, zero scepticism on his face. Honestly, no. I wouldn’t mind if he just kept playing with my hair all day. Who cares if he had to work?  

“Making a change. Different man calls for different hair.” He smiles and Derek starts laughing.  

“Amen! I’m Derek by the way.” I smile and bite my lip.  

“I’m James.” We lock eyes and all of a sudden everything disappears. There is no one around us. Just me and Derek staring at each other. Is this what love feels like? 

Derek then breaks eye contact and reaches for the hair clipper. He broke eye contact first. That probably doesn’t mean anything. He has a job to do after all. 

He looks at me again and says, “Ready for the new you?” And smiles.  

I nod.  

The new me is different. He thinks things through and doesn’t act on emotion. He considers the consequences and acts with the up most just. The new James doesn’t just kill anyone, he kills those who deserve it. Those, who kill our world with their existence. Those, who stain the world with the blackest of black hearts.  

The new me is a role model to children. They will learn from me. They will worship me.  

But first… new hair.  

As Derek starts to razor my hair, I can’t help but wonder if he is single. Such a handsome guy like him must be taken. They usually are. No one is ever left for me. When I was ten, I fell in love with a girl named Mackenzie. She was the nicest girl in my class, and she loved me back. Or so I thought. Truth was she loved my best friend. She used me. Luckily for my best friend, I protect my family and friends from people like Mackenzie. That same day she got an utter stomach pain and kept throwing up. She threw up until there was nothing left to throw up but her organs.  

“Are you single?” I finally manage to ask him. He was almost done with the cutting my hair and seemed disappointed that I was so quiet.  

He smiled. “I actually am. This job takes up a lot of my time, so I haven’t gotten to dating anyone. Not anyone special at least.” He looks straight in my eyes and smiles. I bite my lip. “What about yourself? Any special someone I should know about?” He looks back at my hair as he asks. Smirking under his breathe.  

“Single as a Pringle.” I smile.  

“Maybe we should change that.” He is my soulmate.  

I have always believed in soulmates. This is the universe proving that I, once again, am right. I always am.  

“Maybe we should.” I reply. The sexual tension between us is growing to uncontrollable proportions. I don’t think I can hold myself any longer. Thank God for the covers over my body because otherwise my embarrassment levels would have skyrocketed, and he would have forever laughed at me. He would leave me and tell his future partner how a random guy in his salon got a boner because of him.  

At this point I don’t care about my hair. All I care about is looking at Derek. I think I love him. As a matter of fact, I fall in love very often, but it has never felt this strong. I think I finally understand why partners commit suicide once the other is dead.  

“All right! Last chance to back away from blue hair!” He warns, but I nod a no. “Very well.” He smiles. “But don’t kill me if you absolutely hate it.” I laughed. I would never kill Derek. We are soulmates after all.  

As the dye sets in for about 20 minutes, Derek has left me to tend to other duties. That is a rational decision. He has to work. He has to make us happy somehow and that happiness would cost money. So, I completely understand when he left me there… alone. I forgive him because that’s what good couples do. We forgive each other for the greater good.  

I look around the room and notice Derek talking to another guy. It’s no big deal. He’s a customer. Derek has to talk to customers. He talked to me after all. But this customer was different. Derek looked around the room and back at him. He smiled. But it wasn’t a regular smile. It was a wanting smile. A sexual smile.  

Derek kissed him on the cheek and the stranger left the salon.  

He used me.  

He lied to me. 

“Okay! Let’s get this dye off.” He smiles with what I thought was a smile filled with love. But now I know better. He is an advertisement. These feelings I am feeling are one-sided. He doesn’t love me back. He manipulated me. He has been manipulating me since I came into the salon.  

I am a new person. I cleanse the world of evil. I reform the world, with more love and less darkness. Derek is stained.  

As he washed my hair he looks straight into my eyes and bites his lip.  

I now understand what his true intentions are. He wants to have sex. That’s all I’m worth. A one-night stand. So, I smile back and bite my lip.  

As I make my way back to the chair, he scrapes the side of my thigh and nods towards the back of the salon. I stop at my station to take a first look at my hair before I follow and… 

I barely hold myself from screaming. It is horrifying. My hair looks like the head of a Smurf. I am a Smurf. This is not what I asked for.  

He tricked me. Derek acted like a saint. He manipulated me into falling in love with him, ruined my hair, basically turned me into a Smurf and now wants to fuck me in the back of the salon.  

I am a new person.  

So, I follow Derek to the back room. He never noticed the scissors in my back pocket.  

As I walk into the room, he jumps on me. He kisses me and starts removing my shirt. I do the same. Make the predator believe they have caught the prey.  

I push him slowly back. “Is this all you want?” I try to reason with him. He can still redeem himself. Maybe I’m the one who’s blind sighted to our love. 

He smiles, “Is this not what you want?” I smile a sad smile.  

“I’m sorry.” 

I am a new person. I am a good person. A just person.  

Derek is not.  

Therefore, Derek must die.