Getting Out

“I- I don’t know if I can do this.” His eyes flashed quickly out to the sea around them for a moment before looking back at the envelope he was holding, crumpled from his iron grip. He seemed to consider throwing it out to the sea so only the monsters of the deep would know what secrets it held. “What would you do if I refused? What then?” His words may have gotten braver, but that was the only thing that had. His eyes were watery and his hands trembled. It was an odd look on someone as muscular as him; he was rarely afraid of anything, but the terror written so clearly on his face complimented his features well, she thought. It was a tragedy that she hardly ever saw it.

“Alright then, do what you will. Refuse to deliver it, see how much I care. You are of no value to me, someone else can deliver it in your place. You threw away everything you ever were to join me, and now you death will be of no consequence to anyone at all.” His eyes widened with shock as he processed what she said, but he had no time to even consider pleading for his life before she snatched the letter from his grasp and he was thrown off the yacht into the cold drink below. Gnashing teeth tore at flesh and shattered bone, punctuated by terrible screams that tore through the calm of the night. It was a beautiful sound she thought, a beautiful symphony dedicated to her. She sat perched on the railing for a while listening and watching the beast’s form cut through the water as if dancing to the tune of a memory. She would need someone else to deliver it now, although it would be horribly inconveniencing for her. “Bring me someone else, another dispensable,” she said it to no one in particular, but she knew someone would listen, they always did. 

In less than five minutes, another nameless face appeared, she knew it was too much to hope that he would be up to the task, but wished it wasn’t. “I have a task for you; you will be rewarded handsomely for its completion.” A shadow of a smile appeared on his face at this. She was known for her extremes: the worst punishments imaginable, some that you would never even consider, and rewards better than anything you could ever dream up. It didn’t matter though. She knew he would refuse just as all the others did. “Deliver this letter to the Governor, but be warned. I imagine his reaction to its contents will be quite volatile. Maybe she shouldn’t have added that last bit. Maybe someone would agree if she left that part out. She never did though, she believed they deserved to know what to expect, even if they didn’t know why.

“The Governor, you say?” His face, previously full of confidence, seemed to pale, just a bit. “I’m not sure I’d like to be on the Governor’s bad side.” She steeled herself for what was to come. His death wouldn’t make her sad, of this she was sure, but she was always disappointed. It was a tragedy that so many resources would be wasted on this damned letter. “I think I’m going to have to sit this one out, dollface. I’m sure you don’t mind.” Anything she may have felt about his impending death dissolved at this comment. A man who refused to treat her with the same respect he would treat anyone else above him was not the kind of man she needed on her ship. 

“Despite all of your false confidence, the last one still lasted longer.” She didn’t give him enough time to ask what she meant before he was thrown into the almost inviting arms of the sea. “Tonight you’ve eaten well, my pet,” she shouted over his screams. “Bring in the next one, I suppose.” She knew no one would ever deliver this cursed letter. Hell, she wouldn’t even deliver it. Unfortunately for them, however, she was in charge. 

“Send another one along, I suppose.” Lounging on a deck chair, features illuminated by the moon and stars, she almost looked beautiful. It was unfortunate that she wasn’t, she could’ve been normal if she was, or at least that’s what she told herself. She knew, deep down, she was destined to be an outcast from the moment she was born. Perhaps if the world hadn’t set out to destroy her, she wouldn’t have set out to destroy it. Looking into the water, taking in the grotesque beauty of the blood blooming like a rose in the inky water, it was impossible to miss the marred visage that stared back at her. For what seemed like hours, although it was hardly more than fifteen minutes, she sat waiting for the next victim. After a half-hour, someone finally came. Disappointingly, it was the one person who she couldn’t afford to lose. “Where’s the next man at? So far they’ve all proven to be too cowardly to deliver the letter.”

“I’m afraid you’ve thrown them all in, my heart.” She hated it, how it felt like a gift to hear words that would normally make her throw their deliverer overboard, when they came from those lips. 

“Surely there’s at least one left who’s up to the task.”

“There aren’t any left at all. The only people left on the ship are the man driving it, me, and the most beautiful person I’ve ever had the pleasure of sharing a bed with.”

“And who, pray tell, would the third person be?” Despite the fact that everything she’d worked for seemed like it was about to come crumbling down, she couldn’t hide her smile. How anyone could ever have this affect on her, she’d never understand. Even if the world was about to end, being with this  person, this strange creature, everything felt right.

“You know full well, you silly girl.” The eyes that she was faced with lit up in amusement.

“As much as I love the thought of being alone with you with no one but the moon to judge us, I’m afraid this puts us in quite a pickle. Whether someone wants to do it or not, the letter still needs to be delivered. We’re approaching our destination, which is a problem without a messenger.” 

“What if, when we dock, we recruit the aid of a vagrant? We could offer untold riches if they do it. Even with the risk, the reward would seem worth it to someone like that, don’t you think?” She liked this idea, it seemed like it could work out. Whether it could or not, it was most likely their only option.

“I have my reservations about taking advantage of someone’s less fortunate than me, at least my men had signed up to be under me.”

“I suppose we both know, then, what it’s like to have someone under us.” Smirking, proud of that little comment, it was hard to miss two adorable dimples.

“Now isn’t the time.” 

“Well, seeing as it’s late and there’s nothing to be done until we reach the harbor, I’d say now is the perfect time.” Hard as she tried, which admittedly wasn’t very, she couldn’t find any flaws in that logic, so she followed her lover into their cabin for what could very well be their last good night.

She was woken in the morning by the driver of the ship, she reserved the word captain as he certainly wasn’t in charge. “We’re dockin’ now, miss.” The sunlight filtered in through the open window, its warm fingers lightly caressing her face. How, she wondered, is the world not as terrified for today as I am?  The space next to her bed was empty, the sheets rumpled. She didn’t mind though, she knew they’d meet up again later. As she got dressed, only struggling to lace up her corset by herself a little bit, she noticed a letter on her nightstand. She decided she would open it later, as a reward for getting through what would be the most stressful day of her life. Grabbing her coat quickly, she hurried off the yacht, hoping to find an angel willing to take her burden.

After a half-hour of searching, someone too old to be a boy but too young to be a man clad in scrappy clothes approached her. “Hope ‘m not a bother miss, but your friend told me to find you. Someth’n’ ‘bout deliv’rin’ a letter to a gov’ner?” She tried to see his features better, but his eyes were covered by his hair and his face shadowed by a cap. 

“Yes, just that. Can I presume my companion made you aware of the dangers of this task?” She felt bad knowing that this boy, she’d decided he couldn’t possibly be a man yet, may not come back to receive his prize, but it was a necessary risk. Someone had to do it, and for the first time in a long time she had a reason to live. She couldn’t afford to die yet, not while her beloved still drew breath.

“Yes’m.” The boy’s accent was odd. It was definitely the accent of a vagrant, but it seemed wrong. It really spoke, perhaps, to how much time she’d spent away from her roots. “Who should I say the letter is from?” 

“Say it’s from someone who wants out; he’ll know who you mean, though he won’t like it.” She expected the boy to be confused, as many hired help from the outside were when she said that, but he simply nodded his head. “Remember to try and get out quick, before he opens. Don’t let him get a good look at your face either. You’ll need to discard your clothes, but don’t worry because I’ll buy you a new set.”

“That’d be nice, miss. What’s in this letter that’ll make the gov’ner so mad?”

“I’ll forgive it this time, but mind yourself boy.” He seemed to snicker a bit at this, though she couldn’t be bothered to reprimand him for it as there were more pressing matters. “I’m afraid no one but me and the person you give it to should know what the letter contains. I’ve told the companion that you met with, and even that was a risk . Believe me though, boy, it’s better this way. If I told you what the letter contains, you’d wish I hadn’t.”

“I s’pose I’ll take your word on it then. Before I go miss, can I just say that you look absolutely ravishing.” He took the letter with a wink and went off in the direction of the Governor’s mansion. How he knew where it was she didn’t know, but she didn’t dwell on it. While she wasn't a fan of his boldness, it was always nice to receive a compliment with no strings attached. She had other more important things to worry about, like finding her partner and finding a church to pray for the boy’s safe return.

After about an hour of looking for her one and only, she concluded that it would be best to check back at the ship. It took her awhile to find her white yacht among all of the other white yachts, but she managed. After a struggle that took much longer than she cared to admit, she found herself in her cabin. I might as well read the note now, since it seems I’m out of the woods.  She picked up the letter and opened that carried a scent she would never forget.

Dear Helen,

I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if a stranger risked their for our shot at happiness without knowing what they were getting into, which is why today I will don a disguise and deliver the letter myself. If I manage to survive the Governor’s wrath, we will finally be able to live our lives without looking over our shoulders, because they know what we will reveal if they come for us. Unfortunately, there is a chance that I will not return from this final delivery. I will only take three-quarters of an hour to accomplish this task, so if I do not return by then, my love, assume the worst. We knew we’d have to leave town quickly after the delivery of the letter, but I’m afraid you may have to make the journey alone. Perhaps you would have crew to keep you company, if you weren’t so quick to kill them all! No matter what happens ,though, I don’t regret a thing. I would die a hundred times over if it meant you had a chance at  living. I want you to know that I will always love you and I hope you always remember me fondly, but it’s okay to move on and love again. I know you’ll be stubborn and refuse to let anyone else in because I know you like I know myself, but you deserve love. Please, go out and find happiness, if only for my sake.

All my love,

Victoria

Her eyes began to swell with tears. She managed to feel everything on the spectrum of human emotion in a matter of seconds and it left her feeling empty. “Victoria, you idiot! How could you do this? How could you leave me?” Helen screamed for what must’ve been hours, cursing every deity she could think of, and making up a few new ones when she ran out. After her throat was raw and her heart more empty than ever, Helen laid in the impression Victoria’s body made in their bed and cried herself to sleep. She didn't know how she would get through forever, hell, she didn’t know if she could without Victoria. All she knew was that she wouldn’t concern herself with those thoughts. Tonight, she would look at the stars and try to find a trace of her lover’s eyes.