Rabbit Rabbit

To: ejacobs@henson.schools.nyc.gov

From: l0v3yleslie@cutemail.com

SUBJECT: Why I gotta do this?                    April 17, 2020 12:38PM

Dear Mr. Jacobs,

I get that you love teaching and everything, but you ain’t the only one sending out these online assignments. I’m trying to get all this stuff done but you’re asking me about places I ain’t never been and don’t want to go to. My moms always says New York is the greatest city anyways and she must be right because everyone else in the world wants to come here too. So why I gotta even worry about all these other places if they just trying to be like us? This homework you sending us is whack and I think you gotta be doing other stuff with us. 

I know you gonna say this is inappropriate or something like that, but I’m just keeping it real and you know this the kind of thing I’d say to you in class anyways. 

I know you miss me Mister.

By the way, you can’t be dressing the way you do for them video calls. It be too casual for a teacher. Ain’t no one gonna let you live that down. You know August must be putting you up on TikTok or something. 

Just trying to watch your back, Mister.

Stay Safe,

Leslie

To: ejacobs@henson.schools.nyc.gov

From: l0v3yleslie@cutemail.com

SUBJECT: I'm right here!!!!!!!!                    April 20, 2020 11:29AM

Mr. Jacobs!

You can’t be marking me absent just cause I ain’t doing those whack assignments. You know I’m showing up because of these emails. You talking about me researching history that don’t matter when everyone’s saying we’re living in history right now. Why can’t you just focus on this? I know if we was in class this is what you’d be talking about anyway.

Leslie

To: ejacobs@henson.schools.nyc.gov

From: l0v3yleslie@cutemail.com

SUBJECT: You okay?                            April 21, 2020 3:57PM

I want to first say I’m sorry if I was being disrespectful or something in my last email. I was telling my moms about how I was worried I didn’t hear back from you yet and she went ahead and sort of exploded when I told her what I wrote you. I tried to explain that you weren’t offended by stuff like that but she went on about how things is different when you read them instead of hearing them face to face. I don’t know about all that. I guess she could be right about that, so if she is and if you’re all kind of mad about what I wrote, I’m sorry. It’s just that all of this stuff is weird and you know how I like to talk and everything, but this quarantine is keeping me from my normal self. I guess I am still talking to people, but it just isn’t the same. Plus, you need to be talking to Ms. Rubi and all her other Math friends, they’re killing us with their homework. 

I guess I’m kind of stressed.

The thing is, if I had to choose, you’d be the one teacher I’d want to do work for, but there’s just so much I can’t keep up with it all and I figured, if anyone would understand, it might be you.

I’ll try to get started tomorrow, unless you write me back saying that maybe you get it and that maybe we should just be focusing on the history happening now, which would be really helpful to me to because I don’t really understand it all that well either so I think it might help if you could help me with it.

Write me back!

Leslie

To: ejacobs@henson.schools.nyc.gov

From: l0v3yleslie@cutemail.com

SUBJECT: Hello?                            April 22, 2020 9:18AM

I’m trying to get into your class but it’s saying you didn’t start the call yet. I don’t know if I’m doing something wrong.

Leslie

To: ejacobs@henson.schools.nyc.gov

From: l0v3yleslie@cutemail.com

SUBJECT: I tried                            April 22, 2020 9:53AM

Mr. Jacobs I’ve been refreshing for the whole time and I never got this week’s video link to work. I don’t think anyone else did either. I wrote to August, Hennie and Brenda and they all couldn’t get in. Did you cancel class?

I’m getting worried.

Leslie

To: ejacobs@henson.schools.nyc.gov

From: l0v3yleslie@cutemail.com

SUBJECT: What. Is. Going. On?                    April 23, 2020 9:03AM

MR. JACOBS!

Why am I getting a History assignment from Ms. Fretzl? Who is Ms. Fretzl? Her name looks totally made up -- is it like pretzel? 

Okay. Really though, is she a substitute teacher? I didn’t think we could have substitute teachers while in quarantine. I mean it’s not like you couldn’t “come in” to school because you had to stay home -- you’re already home! Lol!

Also, you could have just emailed us saying you weren’t feeling that great and we wouldn’t have told anyone! You didn’t have to go getting the school involved. This lady is sending us stuff that’s totally different than what you were doing and she has worksheets and stuff. I keep telling my other teachers I don’t have a printer. I can’t be doing worksheets like that. 

This lady’s only been in my inbox one day and she’s already stressing me out.

Part of me is thinking that this is some kind of prank you’re pulling on me because I sent you that email asking if I really have to do this stuff in the first place. 

Is this a prank? If so, nice one. You’re so funny, Mister. You totally got me.

Wait. You never even answered that email, did you?

Hold up. Mr. Jacobs. I haven’t heard from you since last Thursday! Are you okay?

Please write me back. Even if you just type OK.

Leslie

To: ejacobs@henson.schools.nyc.gov

From: l0v3yleslie@cutemail.com

SUBJECT: You’re not okay...                        April 24, 2020 11:42PM

Hi Mr. Jacobs,

I don’t know if you’re getting your email in the hospital, but I just wanted to say hello and let you know that I am praying for you. My mom even lit a candle for you and has been saying her special prayers for you.

If I’m being honest, I’m super scared right now. I am so sorry you got this sickness and I wish there was something I could do or say to make you feel better. I’m really hoping you didn’t read my other emails before you went to the hospital. I was being stupid talking about you being too casual and there you were showing up for us even when you felt so sick. I’m so sorry.

Mr. Jacobs you have to get better. I never had a teacher like you before and I was already missing coming around to your classroom even when it wasn’t my class just to say something funny to you and for you to say something funny back. No other teacher has been like that with me. They’re all like, “Leslie, go to class!” or “Leslie, be serious!” and I am! I am going to class and I am being serious! I know you know that, but they don’t and it’s just nice to be seen by someone and not have to explain myself all the time.

I don’t know why I’m writing all this. I guess I am just worried about you and this makes me feel like I am helping you in some way which I know is stupid, but I don’t know what else to do.

Feel better, Mr. Jacobs.

Leslie

To: ejacobs@henson.schools.nyc.gov

From: l0v3yleslie@cutemail.com

SUBJECT: I don’t know who else to ask                April 30, 2020 2:46AM

Hey Mr. Jacobs,

No one’s telling us anything. Every teacher’s saying things like there’s privacy laws and whatever and that they can’t even know what’s going on with you, so how could we? But how could we not? Word is Ms. Fretzl’s in all kinds of trouble for letting us know you was in the hospital in the first place. Whatever. I think she did the right thing. What was she supposed to say, you went missing?! Ends up she’s kinda alright. Don’t get me wrong, she ain’t you, Mister, but I think you might like her.

My mom says there’s no way we can visit you or anything, and I guess I get that, but I wouldn’t even know what hospital to go to in the first place! I keep asking all my teachers and I even wrote an email to Mr. Hunter to ask him. That man was prolly like “Who dis?” because I don’t think I ever had a personal conversation with the man, but I figure the principal gotta know something about something, right? Well, if he DOES know, he ain’t talking.

MISTER! What’s that about? All I want to know is if you okay! Or how I can help. Or if I can send you something to help you feel better. Or ANYTHING! It’s so hard for me to sleep thinking about what you might be going through thinking none of us even care. I know it be like that sometimes when we be acting cray cray in class or whatever just for laughs, and then you be thinking we don’t like you or your class or nothing, but that ain’t it. We care! I care! It’s just us being kids and stuff, you know?

I think you do know. I hope you do anyways….

The real deal is I just hope they are taking care of you and that you don’t feel alone. I feel weird about it, but I was crying thinking about you being alone and thinking no one cared. We care, Mister! We all miss you and be worried. How can we help? What can I do? All I keep thinking about is how you and all those people in the hospital with you be suffering and struggling to breathe and all I’m doing is sitting home complaining about homework.

Which reminds me. I started doing your assignments, Mister. I’m not sending them in until you say so, though, cause I don’t want you to have so much extra work when you don’t need it, but you just let me know. But… really… all I want to know is that you’re ok, so just keep on breathing, Mister. I know that’s the thing all the people with COVID are struggling with, so just keep breathing. I’m still praying for you.

Leslie

To: ejacobs@henson.schools.nyc.gov

From: l0v3yleslie@cutemail.com

SUBJECT: Rabbit rabbit                    May 1, 2020 12:05AM

Rabbit rabbit, Mr. Jacobs. Remember you told us that some people believe that saying “rabbit rabbit” first thing on the first of the month is good luck? I laughed for the whole class! I always remember that now. I don’t remember who it was that believes it anymore, but I do remember you said it and now I’m saying it for you. 

Let’s see if it really works...

Leslie

To: ejacobs@henson.schools.nyc.gov

From: l0v3yleslie@cutemail.com

SUBJECT: Final Project                    June 12, 2020 10:32PM

Hey Mr. Jacobs,

It ends up Ms. Fretzl is kind of cool. She picked up where you left off and even started to talk about the stuff going on now. For our final project she asked us to write an essay about how learning about History has or has not helped us during the COVID crisis. Obviously, the whole assignment made me think of you, which is why I felt the need to email it here. Wherever you are, I hope you like it.

The History Lesson That Did and Didn’t Help During the COVID Crisis

By Leslie Merci

My history teacher, Mr. Jacobs always said that it was good to learn history because it was just a way to see how other people handled the lifestuff we might get.That always made sense to me until it felt like my life was getting very different than anything anyone dealt with in my history lessons. I’m not even talking about the world. I’m talking about me and Mr. Jacobs. This crisis that has affected the world in historic ways hit really close to home when I found out that Mr. Jacobs got coronavirus. I was really messed up when I first learnt about it and I didn’t know what to do. I was sure there weren’t any History lessons that could have helped me.

Then I woke up in the middle of the night with another nightmare, saw that it was just after midnight on May 1st. That was when I remembered a History lesson that could come to my rescue: Rabbit Rabbit.

I’m sure this isn’t the kind of History lesson you are looking for, Ms. Fretzl, but it was something that I learned in History class and it is the only thing that gave me any kind of help throughout this whole thing.

Here’s the lesson, while no one knows the actual origin of the “rabbit rabbit” superstition, it can be traced back to England. That’s where they started believing that saying “rabbit rabbit” before you say any other words on the first day of the month will bring you luck for the rest of the month! Rabbits are always being talked about as lucky, so this makes some kind of sense. Some other lucky rabbit things are carrying a rabbit’s foot or World War II pilots saying “white rabbits” for luck. 

This is a lesson I always remembered from Mr. Jacobs’ class because I thought it was so funny. Mr. Jacobs and I joked about it all the time! But on May 1st, when I woke up and remembered to say it, I was so excited. It felt better than any of the prayers I said with my mom, or any other way I was trying to help Mr. Jacobs. Honestly, when I remembered to say “rabbit rabbit” at the exact right time, it felt like magic.

Saying “rabbit rabbit” on the first of the month is a superstition, many cultures have them, and I always thought they was silly. In fact, the definition of superstition from the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary says, “a belief or practice resulting from ignorance, fear of the unknown, trust in magic or chance, or a false conception of causation” or “an irrational abject attitude of mind toward the supernatural, nature, or God resulting from superstition” or

“a notion maintained despite evidence to the contrary.” All three of those make it pretty clear that superstitions just don’t work, but cultures everywhere keep having them.

I think I now know why: they help you believe in something.

Before saying “rabbit rabbit” I was freaking out. I was emailing Mr. Jacobs nonstop even though I knew he couldn’t write me back. I felt helpless and scared. Saying “rabbit rabbit” changed everything. It gave me something to hang on to and hope for. 

It didn’t work, of course. 

On May 31, 2020 we got the news that Mr. Jacobs died. I cried for a long time. I’m even about to cry now again just thinking about it. I will always miss Mr. Jacobs and I am so sorry my “rabbit rabbit” didn’t work for him. He deserved a longer life. But I’m happy he taught me about “rabbit rabbit” because it gave me something to believe in. It was a lesson that showed me, just like he always said, how other people handled the lifestuff I got. No one else in history lost Mr. Jacobs the way I did, but they needed to believe they could be lucky and “rabbit rabbit” gave them that, and, for thirty days it gave that to me too.