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Drama Funny

Paranoia, that's what people would say I have. I disagree. It takes me an hour to get home. I am looking to move, but right now it's two buses home. I've seen the bloke before. It's hard to forget him. The stranger has orange hair, today he's trying to hide it under a cap at the back of the bus. He's got one blue eye, one green. He's tall and fit. His body might as well be a triangle.

I've seen this guy on both my buses, just at different times for the past two weeks. Now, he's been on my first bus and is on the second. I rubbed my hand over my face and looked to my phone. Why did I forget to charge it last night? Of all the days to do such a stupid thing and it has to be today.

Okay... So, after getting the bus I have to walk another five minutes, past two roads and roughly eight houses. One house has a broken fence, but they have a large dog who is also responsible for that broken fence. Another house has a short gate and then some painful thorn bushes I could hide in. Worth it? I glanced behind me to see a bulge by the stranger’s side. Yes! It is definitely worth the pain of thorns if it means I avoid a gun.

Why am I being followed? Why am I being followed by a guy who has a gun? Geez, who am I? A spy? Ha. Joke. I can’t even find it in me to punch a sleaze ball who tried to grab my boobs. I shuddered at the memory. Surely, the guy has the wrong person. It’s not like I’m special in anyway. I’m Caroline Hughs with brown hair, brown eyes with an average figure, at an average height. I’m one of “those” faces. The face where people think they’ve seen me before. Still, I’m not about to stop and ask.

As we got close to my stop, I gripped my bag tight, just to decide to only take the essentials from it and put them in my pocket. Running with a huge backpack would not help me run away. I pulled my bobble from my hair, something I’ve seen on tv as a tip so your hair can’t be grabbed.

The film Miss Congeniality came to mind, the self defence method, S.I.N.G is what I remember from the film: Solar plexus, instep, nose, groin. Surely, I can pull that off at least. Oh, but the gun. I guess thorns it is. Damn it.

I gulped heading to the door when the bus pulled up. I didn’t even hesitate to sprint before the doors fully opened. I moved like my life depended on it. Which, it probably does. I didn’t dare glance behind me before I dove over the gate and into the painful bush. My heart raced as I heard rapid footsteps race towards my location. I covered my mouth to prevent my cries being heard. Suddenly, I heard it, a click of a gun. All they have to do is pull the trigger.

I closed my eyes ready to feel the brief pain… well I hope brief before I die. “Ow!” I got a head shot from a bullet, a nerf gun bullet. What the hell? I sprung up to see that stranger remove his hat, laughing loudly at me as he gripped his stomach. “What? What the hell? Who are you?” I asked, wincing due to the thorns I need to remove. “Sorry. Your cousin, Harrison paid me to do this. I have a camera in my hat for him.”

My jaw dropped and my hands clenched to fists. “Why? Why would he do that to me? I thought I was going to die. Christ.” I took a seat on the wall by the gate to gather my breath and wipe my tears away. “I’m Ronald.” Ronald smiled at me with his hand held out. I glared at his hand then him. “Unless your surname is McDonald I’m not interested.” I grumbled finding myself hating ginger hair now.

Ronald chuckled, moving to sit by me. “Sorry, I scared you so much. Harrison’s been pretty obsessed with getting revenge for something that you’ve done.” I gave him an incredulous look.

“No, you’re not, or you wouldn’t have done all that. What did I do anyway that’s made Harrison so “obsessed” with getting payback?” Ronald shrugged. Great, helpful. Really helpful. “Well. It’s time I go and get some answers. Ow.”

“Want some help with the thorns?”

“I think you’ve done enough.” I spat. How dare he try and make things right now. “At least I know who to make the police look for when a girl goes missing.”

“Actually, men are my thing.”

“Not funny. Not funny at all.”

I had to wait until the weekend to visit Harrison. I wasn’t about to confront him over the phone. No. I want to scream in his face. I just might need a step. “Hey, cuz. What’s the haps?” Harrison smirked at his words; he knows how much I hate abbreviations like that. “You know exactly why I’m here, Harrison.” Harrison eyed the marks from the thorns all over me and laughed. He leant against his doorway. “Well, you had it coming.”

Harrison brushed his brown hair back with a huge smile. A faint scar on his forehead showed. I cringed. Over the years, there have been many accidents resulting in injury. All injuries were Harrison’s and all because of me.

His cracked head was a result of me chasing him around a pool and him slipping.

I broke his nose once when digging holes on the beach. In retrospect, I shouldn’t have told him to run and fall into the hole when I was still digging.

When playing football, he was in goal, and I took a shot; it hit a tender place. Need I say more?

We were kids every time he got hurt and each time was an accident. We’re in our late twenties now. I thought we were fine. We never fell out over it.

“If the injuries I caused angered you so much, you should have just told me.”

Harrison shook his head, raising an eyebrow. He stepped to the side so I could come in. I moved to the lounge and to the couch. A whoopie cushion went off. He knew I was coming. Of course he did. “It was nothing to do with that, Caroline. I’m a big boy. I’m over it.”

“You’re clearly not a big boy considering the stunt you pulled. What the hell is it you’re so obsessed over then?”

“You told Missy I cheated on her, and she left me.” I would have felt bad for my cousin if it weren’t for what he did. Harrison’s brown eyes lowered to the floor as his shoulders slumped. He truly loved Missy; he would have never cheated on her. “That wasn’t me. Christ. You made me think I was going to die because of something wasn’t even me? Idiot.”

“If it wasn’t you, who was it then?”

“I don’t care. I peed my pants, Harrison. I’ve never been so terrified. It’s despicable what you did, and you did it because you assumed the worst in me. How dare you!”

“Caroline. I’m sorry.”

“To late for that, Harrison. Trust me. I’ll get you back.”

“Yeah, right. You’d never pull off something like that. Mr prank was cruel but amazing.”

I growled as Harrison laughed at my expense. Part of me wants to find out who lied to Missy and blamed me, but part of me doesn’t care. I just want to get payback on my infuriating cousin. I don’t care if I’m twenty-eight and engaged. I will do the ultimate prank, and it’ll be better than Harrison’s.

My fiancé was waiting for me in his car outside whilst I saw Harrison. I banned him from coming in. Dean already caused damage to that Ronald guy. I’m not sorry. Ronald deserves more than a black eye. Harrison’s family though. I wasn’t about to hurt him physically, on purpose at least. “Are you okay? You look ready to kill for sport. Remember our deal, I kill, you clean up.”

Dean’s joke brought a smile to my lips. It might be bad, but we’ve joked about killing people before. To be fair, it was mostly exes and if anyone hurt someone we love. Sometimes I prefer humour than talking about what’s actually bothering me, to start with at least. I prefer to be cheered up before I open up to people. I just find it easier that way.

“Hey, your brothers are good at pranks, right?” I asked Dean, recalling all the stories of how they tortured Dean with their pranks growing up. Lucky for Dean, those pranks then turned to their stepmother when she first moved in.

Dean raised an eyebrow at me and chuckled before shaking his head. “Yeah, but they’re in their thirties now, babe. Besides, I don’t think they’re as evil as Harrison to do a prank so traumatising.” Dean was not wrong. I’ve been having nightmares of that night. I’ve been imagining that night with a different end, a real gun. I wake up breathing heavily and screaming at times.

“I need my own back.”

“Aren’t you the one you say two wrongs don’t make a right?”

“And aren’t you the one who calls me a hypocrite?” I retorted with a smile.

Dean took my hand and kissed it. The small gesture made me smile brighter. I love him so much, and I know he’ll help me get my revenge.

It’s been three years. It’s been three years since that night that’s caused permanent damage. You would think that I would have forgotten my declaration to Harrison, but no. It’s going to work to my advantage. I’ve gotten married and have a two-year-old and a six-month-old, both boys. My life has been amazing, except when I am triggered. It’s why, now at Harrison’s wedding, to Missy of all f-in people; I’m going to get my own back.

Missy admitted no one claimed he cheated. She lied because she panicked when Harrison declared his love. Angry isn’t even the word I’d use to describe how I feel. It’s why their wedding day is just the perfect day for revenge.

My therapist is concerned that my obsession is making me a bit unstable. Ha. I’m not crazy, they're crazy. Dean’s even getting concerned. Well, bub maybe help with the kids at night and let me sleep and I wouldn’t be so irritable.

I’m all ready for the wedding I’m not even invited to. It’s going to be the disaster of the decade. I am pleased. I’ve got my nephews on my team, thrilled to help. Hopefully my sister won’t be too angry with them helping me.

I’ve got eyes and ears everywhere, thank you bride’s father who hates Harrison. I’m in my car as I watch my first step happen. The box is being delivered to Harrison. The “gift” from Missy. I beamed as Harrison opened the gift to find a positive pregnancy test, a baby grow reading “baby Hughs due December 2024” I watched Harrison drop in the chair by him, suddenly loosening his tie. He rubbed his face and turned to face his best man. “Why the hell would Missy tell me today and like this?”

“Give you chance to bale?” Guy shrugged. “Just go and talk to her.”

I grinned watching on my laptop at Harrison heading to Missy’s dressing room, banging on the door repeatedly until it was yanked open. Harrison didn’t give the bridesmaid chance to shut it. He barged in. Harrison’s body shook as he asked about the box. I leant back quite pleased with myself as Missy told Harrison it wasn’t from her. Their eyes widened in realisation. Muahahaha. My phone rang by me like I expected it to. I smirked picking it up. “Caroline, really? It’s been three years.”

“And yet you didn’t invite me. You should have known this was coming, Harrison. Karma’s a bitch.”

I hung up but continued to watch and listen. Just like I wanted, they fell into a false sense of security. They really think that’s all I’d do. They’re thicker than I thought.

I couldn’t stand to watch my true finale on the screen. It needs to be in person. So, I headed in dressed as a waitress. I’m so plain no one noticed. Besides, since having kids I never look decent. It’s the first time I’ve gone out looking nice in nearly three years. I’m invisible. “Caroline.” Okay, maybe not to my husband.

 I turned to face Dean and dragged him to the side. No one can know I’m here. “What are you doing here?” I hissed.

“Stopping you from doing something stupid.”

“It’s not like I’m going to kill them, Dean. I’m just going to ruin their wedding.”

“Listen to yourself, babe. Just ruin their wedding. That’s insane.”

“Then I’m insane but try and watch those two get back together and get engaged when because of them, I’ve got scars, I got traumatised to the point I don’t get the bus, I learnt to drive which I didn’t want to do. I peed myself for Christ’s sake and still get triggered. They can’t just live happily ever after, after doing that to me.”

My parents died from a car crash when I was a teenager. I refused to drive since. Missy’s lie caused major repercussions that meant Harrison’s prank has scarred me. I can’t just move on and let them get off scot-free that wouldn’t be fair.

Dean sighed and glanced behind me before rubbing his eyes. He nodded. “Fine. What do you need?” I grinned and kissed my husband tenderly. I’m so happy he’s here with me and his parents have the kids. It just wouldn’t be the same without him.

The time dragged. It felt like forever that it came to the vows, and it was time. All I needed was the words “I do” from them both for it to start. Finally, it happened. My nephews released the paint filled water balloons whilst Dean and I went mad with the paintball guns I brought. I shot Harrison more than I shot Missy. All before we were both tackled by members of the wedding party and restrained by them. So worth it.

My smile did not waver as the married couple approached me, multicoloured. Oh, how great it is that there’s going to be photographic evidence of my masterpiece. “Quite done?” Harrison asked, letting out an exasperated breath. “I think I’ve got my revenge. You traumatised me; I ruined your wedding. I think we’re even.”

“Good. Now, Dean take Caroline home and make sure she gets some sleep.”

I’m confused. Neither Harrison nor Missy seemed furious at my actions. They more seemed more sympathetic than anything. Missy even rubbed my arm lightly before Dean guided me away and took me home.

Dean got me to bed the second we got in and I was out like a light. Now, I don’t know how long I slept for, but when I did, I felt a hundred times lighter and awake than I have in years. “Morning, hot stuff. How are you feeling this morning?” Dean asked, getting a drink for me straight away. “So much better., thank you.”

“Great, um. I have something to tell you.”

“Yeah?”

“Harrison and Missy knew you were going to do something else to ruin their wedding. They knew you were there and where you were. They just let you do it.”

I was stunned into silence. Harrison and Missy let me ruin their big day? What? Why? I felt my eyebrows crease as I thought about it. How did they know all that? I need more information. “Um. Why? How?”

“How did they know and why did they let you?”

All I could do was nod. Dean took my hands in his and kissed them both. “Harrison happened to overhear you talking to me when I tried to stop you. He only nodded at me and left. Harrison could have easily stopped you, babe. Instead, he let you carry on with your plan. That’s how guilty he felt about what he did.”

It took a few moments to let it all sink in. If what Dean said is true, then that is one hell of a sacrifice to make to make it up to me. I sighed and slumped back in my chair. Somehow knowing that Harrison made that sacrifice means more than actually getting that revenge on him.

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah.” I smiled. “I just better text Harrison and Missy and apologise. My obsession with what happened three years is finally over.”

May 26, 2024 15:27

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2 comments

Brian Haddad
04:49 Jun 12, 2024

Fun story! I love the idea and how the events played out. The characters were strong and the plot interesting. I enjoyed the read. :)

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Crystal Lewis
03:19 Jun 02, 2024

Those paintballs would’ve hurt 😂

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