There Is No Try

“You’ll never know unless you try.” Mike’s mom said as she stood folding laundry at the kitchen table. 

“There’s lots of things I’ll never know, even if I do try.” Pleased with his quick response, Mike smiled and started for the hallway. 

His mom thrust a pile of folded tee shirts into his chest. “Think about it and don’t just leave those shirts sitting on top of the dresser.”  

Mike knew his mom was right. But he also knew that if he gave in now, it would feel like her decision and not his to go on the interview. 

“Thanks.”

“Nothing says thank you like actually putting the clothes away where they belong.”

It wasn’t exactly a dream job, but then again, Mike didn’t know anyone who had a dream job. Or even a job they liked. Most everyone Mike knew and hung out with was doing something that led nowhere and impressed no one. It didn’t matter if they’d gone to college and dropped out, finished college or never picked up a book after high school. They all told the same story - paying off debt and trying to get together some money to move out on their own so life could begin. 

After Mike put the clothes in the drawers he picked out a pair of no-iron khakis and a light blue, button down shirt. He’d taken the civil service custodian exam thinking of it as a back-up to the back-up plan. He’d done well enough to get called six months later and was asked to come in for an interview with the head of buildings and grounds of the local school district. 

Forget about a back-up plan, Mike admitted to himself as he watched himself in the mirror buttoning his shirt, there was never any plan in the first place. There were thoughts, stoned conversations and internet searches about things he’d like to do, but those were more ways to pass the time than an actual plan. 

Mike came down the stairs, crossed the kitchen and headed straight for the basket with the car keys. 

“You should wear a tie.” His mom was still at the table. She was on to matching socks. 

“Mom. Please.”

“Please what?”

“I don’t need to be told how to dress.” 

Mike’s mom stopped searching for the match to the single white sock she held in her hand and stared at him. Mike timed his stare back just long enough that it would make her wonder if he was sorry for snapping at her. 

“Good luck.” she said and picked up the matching white sock.  

The school was a ten minute drive from his house. Mike had given himself thirty minutes for the drive, plus parking, plus walking to the office, plus being early. But now he also had to get a tie. Mike crunched the numbers and decided to call his friend Jay who lived close to the school. On the third ring Mike decided that a tie was a nice to have and not a need to have. On the fourth ring Jay picked up and the tie was back to being a need to have. 

“Hey” Jay sounded distracted. 

“Hey. Real quick. Do you have a tie I can borrow?”

“Sure. They’re mostly stained though. I’m sure my dad has a nice one. When do you need it?”

“Now. I’m on my way to an interview and I forgot to wear one.” Mike was calculating the fastest route to Jay’s house. 

“Wait. Now?”

“Yes. Now. I don’t care. Just something basic. Just don’t give me something Mr. Davis would wear.” Mr Davis was their sixth grade English teacher and wore ties decorated with cartoon characters. 

Jay chuckled and began to say “Do you remember” but Mike cut him off. 

“Please. I’m sorry man. But I kind of want this job and I’m rushing to get there. I’ll be out front in five.”

“Sure. Whatever.” 

Mike pulled in front of Jay’s driveway. Mike thought about hitting the horn but then heard the creaking wheels and springs of Jay’s automatic garage door as it labored to raise each cross panel. Jay stood just behind the door, in the middle, with his arms raised and waving like a pro wrestler making his way to the center of a packed arena. Around his head Jay wore a solid blue neck tie. 

Jay remained in character and strode to Mike’s waiting car and leaned into the open window. “You want a shot at the belt?” 

“No. Just a tie” Mike said. 

“Huh. Here. Keep it.” Jay took the tie from around his head and tossed it into Mike’s lap. 

“Thanks. I’ll catch up with you later.” 

Mike looked in his rearview mirror and saw Jay still standing at the end of his driveway. He wanted to call Jay and apologize for having to leave so quickly but decided against it. 

Mike sat in in Mr. Zapelli’s office in a chair that possessed the integrity to withstand an atomic blast. Next door to the office was the boiler room and Mike could hear the humming of a motor and could not ignore the smell of heating oil. 

Mr. Zapelli walked into the room and Mike rose to shake his hand. 

“Hey Mike. How’ve you been?”

“I’ve been good. I’ve been doing a bunch of different jobs. Trying to keep busy.”

“Busy is good. Busy is what this job is. It’s always something.” Just then Mr. Zapelli’s phone pinged with a message and he held the phone up for Mike to see. “It never ends around here. Sorry. Just give me a sec. I need to write this person back.” 

Mike thought about the job  for which he was interviewing. He could deal with scraping gum off hallway floors or being sent to clean up after some kid who’d gotten sick after lunch. For three summers while in high school Mike worked maintenance at the middle school. He liked the outdoor parts like mowing the grass or painting the bleachers. Plus he liked bullshitting with the guys who worked there. Even though he was just teenager at the time, they spoke to him like a man. 

Mr Zapelli finished typing into the phone and set it down. The two men sat in silence for a few seconds and Mike began to think he should say something. Instead Mike sat listening to the the hiss of of a pressure release valve on a nearby steam pipe and stared straight ahead.

Mr Zapelli broke the silence. “I know you can work. But this isn’t a summer job. This isn’t something you jump in and out if. The guys here work. They have families. Responsibilities.”  Mr Zapelli picked up a pair of pliers off his desk and inspected them as he spoke. “It’s a 40 hour work week and you’d start nights. You’ll never be rich, but you’ll have a pension and benefits. And if you have your head screwed on you’ll know that’s something.”

Again. There was another pause and both men sat in silence. 

“So what’re you thinking?” 

“It’s not something I just want to give a try. It’s something I want to do.” Mike said and rose to shake Mr Zapelli’s hand