Leave Me Alone

Listen, I thought to myself. Just listen. 

I stood near the dumpster, silently staring out into the woods behind the motel. I wasn’t sure if she was out there or not, but I knew she was nearby, somewhere. So I listened. I could hear the fall wind blowing through the trees, but little else. At 3am, the world was silent other than the breeze, and the sound of the traffic on the highway nearby. I looked at my phone.

“Just leave me alone.” She’d said. 

I looked around, listening again for movement in the woods. The wind continued to blow through the trees. Further away, something rustled through the fallen leaves. I continued to listen; it seemed to be moving closer. Afraid she’d run if she heard me, I quietly moved into the woods, only to have my path blocked by the overgrown foliage. 

I backed out and listened again.

I could hear something else, too, I realized. Somewhere nearby, water ran through the forest. There must be a stream hidden in there somewhere. Frustrated, I looked at my phone.

There was a new message. “You don’t care. If you did, you’d leave her. Just let me die, it will be over soon.”

I texted back. “I do care. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t be out here, freezing looking for you. Please, don’t do this. Just go back inside. We can talk.”

I checked to make sure my phone was set to vibrate and moved away from the dumpster. I walked along the treeline, searching for an opening of some kind. As I neared the far edge of the forest, a clear gap opened in the darkness. I ducked under a branch and moved into the woods down a clearly worn footpath. 

In my pocket, my phone vibrated.

“You don’t care. You never did. Just leave me alone. Because of you, I’m going to die out here in the cold instead of in my motel room. Good job.” I read. 

I held the phone, my breath heavy and visible in the cold night air. I texted back, “I don’t want to fight with you. This is a mess, I’m sorry. Please, just come back inside. We can talk. I don’t want you to die.”

She texted back, “I don’t care what you want. Kill yourself.”

I sighed and moved deeper into the woods. The thick overgrowth broke open around me into a large area with the trees spaced more widely apart. I walked further on, going slowly and listening for the sound of movement in the woods. Something snagged my leg, and I stumbled forward, nearly falling to the ground.

I twisted, catching myself, and looked down in the darkness. An exposed root or branch stuck up from the dead leaves covering the forest floor, forming an almost invisible trap. I glared at the offending limb, offended by its existence. When I turned away from the deathtrap, something moving in the darkness halted me midstep. 

My phone vibrated again; I looked at it. “You don’t care. You never did. Go away, leave me alone.”

I typed back, “If I didn’t care, I wouldn’t be out here in the woods, freezing, looking for you.”

I could hear rustling in the leaves, the unmistakable sound of something walking further ahead in the dim light. “Kat?” When I called out her name, the noise stopped. She was out there, clearly. I must have caught her trying to sneak away from me. Now she froze, trying to hide any further noise in the silence of the forest. 

I flicked my phone, turning the flashlight on. The device illuminated several feet in front of me in a wide cone. Say what you want about cellphones and technology; it’s convenient. “Kat?” I said again.

Silence.

I move forward, shining the light around the forest. It fell on a figure, just ahead, crouched and partially hidden behind a tree. “Kat?” I said.

In my hand, the phone vibrated again. I looked at it. “If you’re in the woods, you went too far. I wouldn’t go that far.”

I looked up towards the figure. A shadow drifted, low to the ground, away into the darkness. I could hear its steps as it crunched through the dead leaves. A chill flickered up my spine as I watched it go. I looked back at my phone and reread the text.

“If you’re in the woods, you went too far.” She said.

I turned and made my way back to the trail, my heart pounding in my chest. I wasn’t sure what I’d seen, but I told myself it had been nothing more than an animal. A skunk or possum perhaps, scavenging in the night for food before the chill of fall turned into the bleak, desolate cold of winter.

Sure, I thought, it made sense, just an animal. 

I broke through the treeline and back out into the lights of the city. My eyes scanned the area. To my left, an embankment led up towards a fence surrounding an equipment rental company; ahead of me was a field that ran along the motel’s parking lot. 

I went to the left, moving up the hill until I could see down into a rather scenic view of the small creek that flowed out from the forest. The area around it was well kept, trimmed, and the whole thing looked like an excellent place for a picnic. If only the situation wasn’t so dire and the weather so cold. I followed the hill along the fence. Ahead of me, a row of bushes separated the grounds of the rental facility from the motel. I tracked along the bushes, on the side of the fence, searching for Kat. 

Noise ran through my mind. A static of thoughts that I tried to push away. I’d known the girl for a long time. When we’d become lovers, I thought it had been under what could be considered mutually agreed upon circumstances.

I’d been wrong. Things between us had deteriorated until they’d become explosive. When I’d helped her get the room in the motel, it had been under the belief that even if I couldn’t salvage the relationship, I’d at least be able to be there for her. Regardless of what happened, I loved her more than I was able to understand. There were things she’d needed from me I’d not been able to do, and yet, I knew I’d follow the girl into hell or damnation before I let her kill herself.

Yet, I always seemed to make things worse. 

Movement to my right tore me from my thoughts. A figure in a hoodie and sweats tore through the bushes and down the hill into the parking lot. She stumbled drunkenly and fell into a pothole. I paused only for a moment at the bushes, before pushing through and following after her at a fast walk. I wanted to catch up with her, but I didn’t want her to think I was chasing her.

She’d been through so much in her life, and the feeling that everything I did only made things worse held me back, even as I struggled to catch up. 

“Kat!” I called out. “Please, just stop.”

She cursed at me and pulled herself to her feet, running again, right towards the trees. 

I hurried after her, the situation eliciting almost humorous images of characters in horror movies stumbling as they ran from their slower but never faltering pursuers. She hit the edge of the forest and went in, right through the overgrowth. 

I cursed quietly, then called after her. “Kat, please. Just stop. If you go in there, I have to come after you! Please, stop!” 

The girl I’d known for so long, and for who I feard so much, disappeared into the trees. 

When I reached the edge of the woods, I didn’t hesitate; I pushed right in after her. The branches tore at me as I ducked under through. I shoved and twisted at sharp wood, sticks, and thorns in my path until I saw a figure sitting against a tree in the darkness. 

“Kat. Please. Just talk to me.” I said.

The girl stood, snatching a heavy branch from the ground. She brandished it towards me as a weapon. “Go away!” She screamed, swinging the club in my direction. 

I backed away a step, lifting my arms and averting eye contact. “Please, Kat, stop. I don’t want to fight you. I’m scared; I don’t know what to do. Please.” I said.

She swung the club again, narrowly missing me. “Go away!” She screamed. “I don’t want your help. I want you to die! If you come any closer, I’ll kill you myself!” Again, the girl swung the club, and this time, she connected. 

Something sharp ripped through my hand and up my arm. I twisted away, holding my wrist as the adrenaline numbed the pain. I looked back at the girl, who had turned away from me and was running further into the woods. I sucked in a breath, ignored the numb feeling in my hand and arm, and moved to follow. 

The scene repeated itself several times as we moved further into the woods. Each time, she would stumble to the ground or stop and sit while I caught up. And each time, as I’d call out to her to wait, to talk to me, to just stop, she’d turn on me again. Her screams and threats grew in intensity as the scene replayed itself. 

Eventually, we stood several feet apart on top of a hill overlooking the creek that ran through the forest. She screamed at me again, and my patience broke. Finally, I screamed back.

“Go away! Just leave me alone!” She screamed, cursing at me again.

“I can’t!” I shouted.

She charged forward, swinging another makeshift club. “Just go away. Let me die! You never cared about me!”

“If I didn’t care, I wouldn’t be out here right now!” I shouted back.

“You’re only out here for yourself. You don’t care about anything but how you look!” She shouted, swinging the club again and narrowly missing me.

I snapped. “I swear,” I said, standing still and staring at the girl I’d loved for so many years and feared I’d lost so long ago. “If you hit me with that thing, I’m going to bring you to the ground. I’m done. I’m not doing this anymore.” I said.

“Get away from me, or I’ll kill you.” She said. 

“Do it then, come one!” I shouted back. “Just do it; we’ll die out here in the woods together. But I swear, if you hit me with that thing again, I’m hitting you back.” I said, hating myself even as the words left my mouth, knowing it wasn’t true. Even if she did hit me with another tree branch, the most I’d ever be able to do was try and restrain her. And even that would only end up with me getting another black eye.

She ran again, leaving me standing there as the adrenaline finally faded. The pain in my arm blossomed into something tangible, which collided with the emotional turmoil I’d been holding back for days. A bitter sob escaped my lips as my resolve broke. The tears flowed as I tried to stumble after her. 

I knew she’d gone down the hill and crossed the creek. I followed and found myself standing on a small island. I continued to cry as I walked, moving around the circumference of the landmass. Eventually, I had to admit defeat. She was gone. 

There was nothing around me but silence. I stood there, alone in the woods, choking back my sobs. “Fine!” I called out. “If this is how you want it,” another moan cracked through as I struggled to get the words out. “You win. You always win! If you want, I’ll leave.” 

I turned to head back the way I’d come when a figure darted through the shadows ahead of me. “If you’d just stood still,” I said, “I never would have seen you.” I followed again, but my heart wasn’t in it, and moments later, she was gone again. I heard rustling in the trees ahead, but I ignored it. I couldn’t do it anymore. 

I paused, finding myself at the edge of the creek separating the island from the rest of the woods. A sizeable fallen log bridged the gap over the water. I stepped onto it, and my foot slid back sharply. I went down, hard. Pain shot up through my shoulder and my hip. I cried out, and everything went dark for a moment. After that, I just lay there, sobbing on the ground. 

“I’m going to be the one that dies out here….” I wheezed, mostly to myself. 

Silence, and then something moved on the other side of the creek. Leaves and branches snapped as something made its way towards me in the darkness. I tried to look but could see nothing over the fallen log 

Whatever it was, moved closer to the edge of the embankment. 

A figure emerged from the darkness near my head and reached out a hand. I grabbed it and let Kat pull me to my feet. 

“There’s something there.” She said.

“Yeah,” I choked.

“I’m not leaving you out here.” She said. “We need to go. Follow me.”

I stumbled after the girl, struggling to hold back my sobs. I was ashamed, broken, and embarrassed. More, I was terrified. The thing that had been moving closer, it had fallen silent when Kat pulled me to my feet, but now, I could hear it, behind us in the dark, tracking our steps. 

I followed the girl until we hit another crossing. She stopped and looked around. I stared at her, and something about the look in her eyes when they met mine chased all the emotion away. Suddenly, I was empty, cold, serious. 

“We went too far.” She said. “This is why I told you not to follow me.” 

“I know where we are,” I said, my voice hard. “I was in here before, remember. It’s this way.” 

We crossed the water, moving back in the general direction of the motel. Behind us, the thing kept pace, always close but out of sight. Occasionally, I’d look back to see Kat right behind me, glancing over her shoulder, but she said nothing. 

I remembered the knife in my pocket, a sharp, quick release Smith and Wesson pocket knife she’d bought me as a gift. I pulled it out and held it close to my side as we continued. As we neared the edge of the woods, we found our path blocked by an overgrowth of cattails and weeds. I paused, considering the way forward when something cried out from the darkness behind us.

I looked back and saw Kat’s eyes go wide at the noise. I didn’t hesitate; I pushed forward, shoving the tall weeds down with my hands and feet to clear a path out of the woods. Kat followed close behind as we worked our way through the marshland. I stopped when we came to another break in the ground. The small creek ran in front of us again, twisting through the darkness. A mess of fallen branches and logs bridged the gap to the other side, and I crawled over then turned and held out my hand. 

Kat simply stared at it. 

“It’s just a hand; it means nothing; let’s go,” I said.

She glared at me, hate and fear mixing with something else much more desperate in her eyes. She looked down at the mess of wood and crawled across on her own, ignoring my outstretched hand. I shook my head at her stubbornness and turned to push forward. 

We came out of the woods behind the dumpsters, where my night had started. 

Kat stood beside me as we turned to look back into the woods. The rustling continued to move closer until it stopped just inside the treeline. Out of sight. Whatever it was remained forever hidden in the darkness. 

“I still hate you.” She said. “Go away.”

I looked at her. I wanted to cry, hold her, and tell her I was sorry, but the words would only enrage her again. 

“All I wanted was to get your asthmatic ass out of there.” She said. “Now go away. And don’t come back.”

I choked back another sob and started to say something, but she stopped me.

“Clearly, I’m not going to die tonight. Just go.”

Unable to argue any longer, broken and exhausted, I began to make my way across the parking lot. I turned and saw the girl still standing there, watching me. 

“Don’t come back.” She said.

I turned away again and made my way to my car. I opened the door and dropped into the seat. I paused, taking several breaths to calm down before starting the thing up and backing out of the parking lot. I reached forward, hanging my phone from the clip on the dashboard when it vibrated again.

I flicked it and checked the text message.

“I still hate you.” It read.

I shook my head in exasperation and drove into the night. As I did, my phone vibrated again. I checked it. Three more texts came through in rapid succession. 

At least, she was alive, I thought as I drove home.