Cats of March

“So, remind me again why you wrote to your ex-boyfriend of ye olde?”

“Ye olde?”

“Yeah, like back when you were a young, dumb high schooler?”

“Oh, well, I wrote him because I… I dunno. Something compelled me to.”

“You’re crazy. I mean, how stupid can you be? Did you ask him if he remembered you? I bet you did. He better, that piece of shit. With what he put you through.”

“It wasn’t that bad, Liesl, honestly.”

   “To hear you go on about it makes it sound like it was. Plus, I was there, remember? The best friend, that girl? Yeah, that was me. The one you called and cried to. ‘Liesl, he… he… oh my god he broke up with me…. for the…. for the… for the seventh time!’”

“I don’t sound like that. And it was six times, wasn’t it?”

“So what’s going to come of it?”

   “I don’t know. I just asked to go to coffee.”

“Coffee? Hell, are you going garage saling after?”

“Don’t make fun of me. I just need to close out some shit in my past.”

“Things that happened eight years ago?”

“Yes! Does it really matter how long ago it was? It happened. Let’s deal with it.”

“You know, I faintly remember saying those same words before. I think it was, oh, about eight years ago. Now who did I say that to? Hmmm…. oh yeah, it was you as you bawled away on my front porch after Mr. Douche broke up with you. For the seventh time! Did I mention that?”

“Oh, get over yourself. I’m going.”

   “Fine.”

“Fine.”

* *  *

“Hey! Ah, thanks for coming.”

“No problem.”

“I admit, this is a little awkward.”

   “Yeah, a bit more than a little. It surprised me you wanted to meet me for coffee. God, how long has it been?”

“Eight years.”

   “Holy hell, really? Eight?”

“Yep, eight.”

   “Then there were those weird times I’d see you out in town and say hi and you’d ignore me.”

“Yeah, that was bitchy of me.”

   “Weird.”

   “Yeah… I think we should stop bringing up weird stuff and just talk about the here and the now.”

“Alright. Fine. You’re in charge.”

“Good.”

“So you still seeing what’s his name?”

“Steven?”

   “Yeah, that guy you dumped me for. That was his name, right?”

“God, you’re still on that. I was seventeen! Look, I wanted to have coffee with you and talk like grown-ups.”

“Sorry, I guess I got carried back in time. It’s been eight years Kristen, do we really have anything in common anymore to talk about? We’re not exactly the same people we were back then.”

“I know, I just wanted to… talk. Mend fences, yeah?”

   “Well, I’m all for trying, but honestly, I don’t know what good it’ll do.”

    “I don’t either.”

    “I mean, what do you want from me?”

    “I don’t know! Maybe for you to shut up and listen. You act like I ripped out your heart and spit on it and now you’re just dwelling on it when all I want is forgiveness.”

   “Don’t be so dramatic. Chill out, people are staring.”

“Sorry.”

“And I am the one who was perfectly happy in my world without you. You’re the one that called the meeting.”

“Well, I just wanted to see how you were doing.”

“I’m fine, thanks.”

   “I mean, you were a big part of my life once. I guess I feel like a piece of me is invested.”

   “Invested? Jesus, I’m not some company you bought stock in. I was your high school boyfriend, and that was that.”

   “That was that, huh?”

“Yeah. You don’t owe me nothing and I don’t owe you nothing.”

   “Well, maybe a part of me will always care.”

   “Aw geez. Don’t sit there and tell me a part of your heart will always be mine, blah blah blah. Makes me sick. Listen, Kristen, you don’t have to sit here and do this.”

“Do what?”

“Apologize.”

   “Apologize for what? I don’t owe you an apology!”

   “Well then, why the hell are we here?”

   “That’s what I’m trying to tell you! I just wanted to make sure everything was okay with you. Make a connection. You’ll never be fully out of my life. My past is still a part of me. Just because we broke up eight years ago doesn’t mean…”

    “Are you even listening to yourself?”

    “What does that mean?”

    “Are you lonely, is that it? No man in your life right now, so you’re looking backward instead of forward?”

    “Screw you.”

    “Where are you going?”

    “I’m leaving. We’re through here. I don’t need to sit here and listen to this.”

     “Fine!”

* *  *

“So, how’d it go? To your liking?”

   “Shut up Liesl, I don’t want to talk about it.”

“You were gone nearly six hours. Must have been a long chat.”

   “I went to the mall after, okay? Wanted to walk off some steam.”

“Some retail therapy? Must have been a pleasant talk.”

   “I said I didn’t want to talk about it.”

   “Well, fine. I guess you don’t want to talk about this either?”

   “What is it?”

   “Mr. Douche dropped it off a couple of hours ago. Thought you’d be home, but as you know, you weren’t.”

   “It’s a calendar.”

“Look, there’s a note in the beginning of March.”

“Kristen, I remembered you liked cats. Hope you enjoy it. What the hell is this for?”

   “Maybe it’s so you’ll remember what day it is?”

“That’s stupid.”

“No, a cat calendar is stupid.”

   “Why the hell would he buy me this?”

“I’m telling you, it’s so you’ll know what day it is! What else is a calendar for?”

    “There must be more. Did you look through every page?”

    “What? No. I have better things to do with my time than leaf through every page of a kitty calendar.”

“Nothing! There’s nothing else written.”

“Seriously, Kristen, you’ve got to get a hold of yourself.”

   “Liesl, did he say anything when he dropped this off? Anything?”

   “Uh no. He said, ‘Is Kristen home?’ ‘No dude. She was supposed to be with you.’ ‘Yeah, well, she’s not. I bought her this.’ ‘Alright.’ ‘Alright.’ And that is all, I swear.”

“What the hell?”

   “Kristen, seriously.”

   “It just doesn’t make sense!”

“None of this does! You’re freaking out over an eight year cold relationship for no reason. What happened at coffee?”

“Nothing. We just… we fought.”

   “As usual.”

“Shut up! He said I didn’t need to apologize.”

   “Apologize? For what?”

“That’s what I said.”

“And then?”

   “And then he asked if I was lonely.”

   “Well, he pegged you there.”

   “Good grief Liesl.”

“Sorry dude, just saying.”

   “What am I going to do with this?”

   “Well, we don’t have a calendar…”

   “I’m not using a kitty calendar my boyfriend from high school bought me.”

    “But you’ll have coffee with him?”

    “Honestly Liesl.”

    “I’m only telling you how I see it. You’re being ridiculous. I think you are kind of lonely.”

    “What?!”

“I said kind of. Look, you’ve been single for almost a month. Ryan took a lot out of you. Maybe you’re just… I dunno. Maybe you’re panicking. Your birthday is coming up. You’ll be twenty-five…”

“Go on then, if you’re going to lecture me like my mother. I’ll be twenty-five and?”

   “Kristen, it's okay to be single, even on your birthday.”

“That’s not the point.”

“Well, my point remains, Kristen. Why in God’s name did you want to reminisce with your high school boyfriend from hell? Well?”

“I guess… I guess I am lonely.”

“So maybe this was your way of fighting that. It was something to do.”

“Yeah, something.”

“Maybe you should wait until, oh… June, when the kitties are playing in the basket of yarn, to look for a new boy toy.”

“Oh my gosh Liesl, sometimes you’re enraging.”

“Where are you going?”

“I’ve gotta lie down and rest.”

“Well, I’m hanging up the kitty calendar!!”

“Fine.”