The horror that is my life

I was totally confused but mind you not the type of confusion that you feel when you are trying to choose what cloth to wear or what shoe to wear that will go with your cloth but the type of confusion that if care is not taken, you will go straight to a panic attack coupled with tears and when I mean tears I mean lots of tears that will leave you with a runny nose, red eye and a massive headache. Now that we have established the fact that I'm terribly confused,let's talk about why I'm confused but before that i will like to introduce myself. My name is Heather and I'm 63 years old, I've also been married for 40 years to my perfect husband whose name is Martin. I have four children; Amelia, Rachel, Christopher and Jason. Amelia and Rachel are married with children, Jason is planning his own wedding and Christopher has bought a ring to propose to his girlfriend on Valentine's day which is in two weeks time. Don't ask me how I know that. There is a two year difference among all my kids so Amelia is 39 years, Rachel is 37 years, Christopher is 35 years while Jason is 33 years. 

Now that I've been properly introduced, let's really go to why I'm confused and on the edge of a panic attack. I went to sleep yesterday with my plans for tomorrow including a journey to the spa to prepare for my beloved husband's return from a business meeting that lasted two weeks only to wake up this morning to discover that I'm actually not 63 years but 28 years old and that I have three little children not adults; Rachel is 5, Amelia is 3 while Christopher is 1. I'm still in shock, Martin is not actually my 67 year old aged husband that we've fought battles together and won but my 32 year old husband that the only battle we are fighting right now is who gets the children after our divorce. This nightmare started when I woke up to the ringing of my phone, I can still remember that it was a man who said his name was Mitch and that he is my lawyer and he started talking about how he's not sure of what to do given the fact that I can't find much dirt on my husband and because he is far richer than I am and that he's sure that the judge will give him the kids. At first, I thought it was an innocent case of mistaken identity but no matter how much I tried to convince "my divorce lawyer" that that was the case he was so adamant that he knew who he was talking to. Angrily, I cut the call and went to the bathroom to rinse my face and brush my teeth using the mirror and that was when I knew I was in serious trouble. I did not look old, I looked young. Not the kind of young that in your old days will be a compliment because who wants to be referred to as old, I'm not sure about others but I most certainly do not want that except if the person referring is me but that is beside the point, I'm talking about the kind of young that when you look at me , you will be in doubt as to whether I am a day above 25. I tried remembering anything to help me but it was a futile effort, I felt totally lost. It was like I was watching the movie 'A day in Heather's life' and not actually living said life. As if the bombshell I got was not enough, my two older children came to greet me in the bathroom because apparently that is where I always am when they wake up. If that did not shake me I'll actually be lying. That meant that I had a particular routine that even if my mind didn't remember, my body did. Another situation that made me want to bawl my eyes out was that I was supposed to do a ritual that I supposedly do everyday with the kids on a normal day as this day was far from normal and I had no idea what they were talking about. It was disconcerting to say the least especially since I had no choice but to explain to the girls in a simpler version that mummy had no idea what they were talking about. Needless to say it, I ended up comforting the girls and reassuring them that mummy was tired but perfectly okay and that once mummy catches her breath mummy will be as right as rain. Thank God for little blessings, at least for the fact that Rachel and Amelia took my explanation serious and did their best to allow mummy to relax. Aside from having to deal with aged 5 and 3 year old girls that I had no recollection of, I realised that I also had a 1 year old baby boy when said baby started screaming enough to wake the dead. When I heard the baby crying, I felt the first spark of hope because I was so certain that once I held that child I will remember everything but lo and behold I did not remember anything. It was like I came straight from an horror movie because I did not even remember anything about the precious bundle I was holding though he had no trouble recognising me. It was like a film director should come and just shout 'cut' for the horror movie I was acting and everything would be alright again. The bad thing about my situation was that even though I could remember my children as adults, I had no recollection of their childhood years which was a second pointer that something was very very wrong somewhere. The me I could remember I was used to go charging into situations and solving riddles and puzzles in life but this particular puzzle seemed unsolvable by anyone and especially not by me.