Say Yes to Life

Act I

   "So, what's the catch?"

   These words flashed across my brain in bubbly, bright neon letters. But what actually came out of my mouth was…

   "Yes."

   Why do I do this to myself? Always the 'people pleasure.' I don't know what it is, but saying yes always feels so good. Plus, it feels easier to be agreeable with people rather than trying to do the silly back-and-forth dance of an actual conversation. I hate talking to people. Talking to other people is entirely dull and meaningless. It's so much better to be in my own head. Much more fun and vibrant place, and people make it beige and boring.

   "I'm sorry, I am talking out loud?"

   "Yes," said the man, sobbingly.

   "My apologies. As you can probably tell, I have a lot on my mind right now," Gerard says, rubbing his temple with the end of his pistol. He is sitting on an industrial table, swinging his legs, looking at the sobbing man he has tied up and blindfolded in front of him.

   "So you can see the pickle I am in, right?" says Gerard. "Had I asked some follow-up questions before taking this contract, I might not be in this pickle. Maybe this whole situation could have been avoided if I had known I was to kill the head of the Triad gang, Kenji Fong."

   "You don't need to…."

   "SHUT UP!!!' yells Gerard as he jumps off the table, pointing the gun towards Kenji Fong. "Shut your mouth. Please be respectful and don't interrupt while I am processing."

   Gerard collects himself, combing his wavy, black hair back into place with his hand.

   "Now, where was I?" as he turns and paces with his hands and gun behind his back.

   "Ah yes, this little pickle. Had I not been so eager to avoid a conversation, I may have known that I would be killing the head of the Triads. And by killing the head of the Triads, I would, with complete certainty, be hunted down, mercilessly, by the entire organization in retribution."

   Gerard stops pacing and suddenly lunges inches from Kenji Fong's face, speaking in a low, soft voice.

   "But maybe it's bigger than wanting to avoid people. Maybe I love the chaos that comes with jumping into the unknown. Maybe it's what I need to survive." Gerard boops his gun on Kenji Fong's nose, spins away, and raises his arms in the air, shouting, "say yes to life!" before pacing again.

   "This mindset lead me to become a contract killer, you know. It really all started when my mom died; I was beginning to feel…."

   "What the fuck, man?! You're fucking crazy! Let me…"

   *Pop*

   Kenji Fong slumps in his chair as Gerard blows the smoke away from his gun, sighing.

   "Damn it. I really thought I was getting somewhere. Oh well, we'll jump into next time."

   Gerard puts his gun inside his suit coat and walks from the abandoned warehouse to his car. His shoulders are a little more relaxed. His gait is lighter.

   "It's a process. It's a process," he whispers under his breath as he gets into his car. He pulls his phone out of his pocket and dials a number.   

   "How did it go?" asks the man on the line.

   "Pretty good. I feel like I am making real progress," an elated Gerard replies.

   "Goddamnit, G, I don't care about your spiritual journey bullshit! Did you kill Kenji Fong?!”

   "I did, the little prick."

   "Good. Now you must get out of town and lay low for a bit. The Triads are going to be pissed and will be looking for you. I'll reach back out in a bit with your next assignment."

   "Roger, roger," replied Gerard as he hung up the phone and continued driving towards the Mexican border.

Act II

   A man is standing in front of his car in an empty parking garage. His hands are in his pockets, and he is nervously waiting when the screeching of tires echoing in the garage draws his attention. Soon, two black SUVs pull up to park next to him, and a man exits with two bodyguards.

   "Mark, how are you? How did the Triad job go?" the man in the black SUV exclaimed while extending his hand.

   "Keep your voice down, Geno," whispered Mark as he to his hand to shake it.

   "There ain't anybody here, Mark. Relax. Although, I appreciate the theatrics of meeting in a parking garage. I feel like I am doing some real covert crime shit."

   "You can never be too careful."

   "So, Mark, is the Triad job done?"

   "It is."

   "Oh boy, your guy is in some hot fucking water, man," Geno said, laughing.

   "He has gotten out of town and will lie low until the Triad heat dies down."

   "Ah, well, I have another job for your guy."

   "No way, Geno. Gerard is too hot right now. The Triads are going to sweep the entire Southwest to skin him alive. We can't take anything right now."

   "C'mom, Mark. This is a personal one. I really need him."

   "No way," Mark said, shaking his head. "Plus, your dad knows better than to try another hit so soon."

   "Ah, well, that's the thing, Mark, I need your guy to take out Papa."

   "What?!"

   "I told you it was personal, Mark."

   "You're fucking joking, right. Don't be ridiculous."

   "Mark, I need you to take out Papa."

   "Why?!"

   "I have my reason."

   "Why, Geno? It makes no sense."

   "Papa's time has come. It's time for new leadership."

   "No way, Geno. I ain't doing it."

   "You won't even talk to your partner about it."

   "No. It's ludicrous."

   "I think your partner would want to at least hear about a two million dollar contract."

   "I'm leaving, Geno." Mark opens his car door, but one of Geno's bodyguards slams it shut. Geno gets right up to Mark's face.

   "Take the job, Mark," says Geno softly, "or I'll call Gerard myself; tell him your guys' little fifty-fifty partnership is actually seventy-thirty, and I'll give him three million dollars to kill Papa and you."

   Mark gulps and, in a quivering voice, says, "we'll do it for three million."

   "Mark," says Geno as he leans back and smiles. "Do you really think you have any leverage right now? You'll take two and be honored that someone thinks your dead ass corpse is worth a million bucks."

   Geno reaches into Mark's jacket and pulls out his phone.

   "Make the call, Mark."

   Mark grabs his phone and calls Gerard.

   "Hello."

   "G, I got a job for you."

   "Yeah, I'll do it."

   "Okay. I'll text you the details."

   "Roger, roger."

   Mark puts his phone back in his pocket as Geno and his guard return to the SUV.

   "What's Gerard's philosophy, Mark? 'Say yes to life!'" said Geno, gesturing his hands mockingly flamboyant.

   "Text me when it is done, Mark."

   The black SUVs screech out of the garage, leaving a stunned Mark alone again in the garage.

   "Shit."

Act III

   "Wakey, wakey, old man," says Gerard tauntingly.

   Slowly, Papa wakes up and sees Gerard lying on the couch with a gun resting on his chest.

   "What the hell is going on?" says a groggy Papa.

   "So last time we started talking about my mom's death. Obviously, that had a huge impact on me and probably has led me down this path."

   "What the hell?! Untie me right now! Do you know who I am?!"

   Gerard sits up from the chair, irritated, and points the gun to Papa.

   "Shut the fuck up, OLD MAN!"

   Papa stiffens up in his chair, causing Gerard to lower his gun, "I'm sorry, man, there is just a lot of emotional stuff I am trying to deal with here, and it's very frustrating when I am interrupted."

   Gerard lays back down on the couch.

   "So my mom passed away when I was 14, essentially making me an orphan."

   "What about your dad?" asked a confused and scared Papa.

   Gerard replied without missing a beat, "that asshole bounced when I was four. I really hated him for doing that. He put a lot on my mom. She could make things work for a while, but eventually, she had to get a second job. Inflation and shit."

   "Yeah, make sense," responded a still confused Papa.

   "So when she passed, I was lost and alone. That is when Mark found me. I would probably have died if Mark hadn't taken me under his wing. I said yes to life, and Mark taught me much about it. He taught me how to shave, get fitted for a suit, and properly fire a gun without alarming the neighbors."

   Papa had a thought. "What would your mom think about who you have become?"

   Gerard sat up and looked Papa in the eyes. Not one of the people he kidnapped and killed had asked him a question about himself. They were all concerned about not getting killed.

   "What did you say?" asked a puzzled Gerard.

   "Your mom probably didn't want to become a killer. I'm sure she wanted you to be successful. What did you want to be when you grew up?"

   Gerard sat staring at Papa, dumbfounded, but Papa stared right back, sensing this was the best way for him to be let go or at least buy time until his bodyguards got suspicious and came to find him.

   "An astronaut."

   "An astronaut?"

   "Yeah, I really wanted to be an astronaut. My mom and I even saved a jar of spare change for me to go to the astronaut camp in Cape Canaveral. But Mark took the jar when she died, and I never thought about astronaut camp again."

   "But you make good money now."

   "You're damn right I do! I am getting paid a pretty penny to kill you," laughed Gerard.

   "Well, you should go to that space camp."

   "What?"

   "You need to go to space camp. It would've made your mom smile to see you at space camp and becoming an astronaut."

   Gerard sat there for a while and thought about what Papa had said. He scratched his temple with his gun, then stood up from the couch.

   "You know what, old man, I am going to space camp. I deserve it!"

   "You do deserve it!"

   "And you know what? I am going to become an astronaut!"

   "You are an astronaut!"

   "No more killing for me! Say yes to life!"

   "Say yes to life!" says Papa, smiling, "Does that mean you are going to let me go."

   "Absolutely not," replied Gerard coldly.

   "What, why? Why not start your new life right now?" pleaded a scared Papa.

   "Oh, I'm not going to kill you, old man, but I won't let you go. You'll get your bodyguards to hunt me down right away. I want to get a head start, and I assume they'll get suspicious and come looking for you if they haven't heard from you in a while."

   Gerard started heading towards the window when Papa asked, "Hey, who put out the hit on me?"

   "I don't know, but it must have been somebody who wanted your job because I am getting paid six hundred thousand dollars to whack you."

   Papa knew that his son, Geno, was the one to put the hit out on him. Once his men found him and untied him, he would deal with Geno.

   When Gerard got back to his car, his phone rang. It was Mark. Gerard answered.

   "Is it done?"

   "I'm going to be an astronaut."

   "What the fuck! I don't have time for your dead mama drama bullshit, man! Did you kill the old man?! Is it done!"

   "I'm going to be an astronaut, Mark."

   "This isn't fucking funny, G! We got a lot on the line! Did you get it fucking done!"

   "I know you stole my space camp jar. You have given me only thirty percent, Mark, even though you said it was fifty. But it doesn't matter now because I am off to astronaut camp."

   "GERARD! GERARD! DON'T HANG UP ON…."

   "Roger, roger," says Gerard as he tosses the phone out the window. He starts his engine, roving it several times, with a big smile.

   "Cape Canaveral, here I came," Gerard peels out towards his destiny.