Broken

Diamond allowed her eyes scan the cottage in front of her. Twenty years and it looked just the way she had left it. Slowly, she closed her eyes and drew in deeply the cool air. A tear dropped as she opened her eyes. Once this little house used to be filled with laughter. Diamond turned to a small bench in front of the cottage. Twenty years ago, she and Ruby would sit and watch the sun set with whatever emotions they had. Diamond swallowed hard, cleared her throat and walked to the door, chin up. She kicked a flower that had been misplaced, standing in front of the door. For a minute, she stared at the flower pot, then bent with teary eyes to set it in place. Gently, she shook her head, wishing it would tuck her woken memories back to sleep but her wish never came through. "I'm going to nurture this flower 'till I grow old*, Ruby's big smile appeared, " it's sure going to be by my side on my deathbed ". "I should have named you after a flower rather than a precious stone", Susan laughed. " Momma, why did you name us after stones ?" Diamond asked. " 'Cause you both are special to me and I love you ", Susan put up a warm smile. Diamond looked away from the pot and dabbed her eyes with the gloves she had on. Shaking her head again, this time vigorously, she got up, turned the door knob without a knock, and stepped into the house. " Nothing's changed", she whispered after a quick survey. Her eyes went over the picture frames that were hung on the wall. That was one favour Mabel had done, leaving the pictures just the way Susan had left them. Smiles began to form through her hardened face. Their smiles were contagious; Ruby and Susan, her only family. Judging from the array of pictures, one would think there was no father and Diamond wished it had been that way, 'cause to her, Jack was no father but a murderer. "Who are you?" A feminine voice called from behind. Engrossed in the pictures, Diamond didn't hear someone come in from the inner room. She sniffed, wiped her tears and turned. "How have you been, Mabel?" Mabel stood squinting. The face looked familiar but she couldn't place it. "How's Jack?" Diamond forced a smile, "where is he? I can't see him anywhere". Diamond sat on the sofa, " The house, it looks the same. I thought you guys would have remodelled it, living happily, 'cause the two little devils were out of your lives". " Diamond ", Mabel gasped, eyes widened, suddenly realizing who it was. " Yes, Diamond". "Jack died", Mabel bowed her head, " a year after you left ". " You mean sent me packing", Diamond chuckled, you know, he did right. If I had stayed that night, I would have killed you both ". Mabel's eyes began to click pictures of Diamond as she spoke. Her red painted lips, the black jacket on the black pants she wore and the black gloves she had on, all giving her the dangerous look. As soon as Diamond spat out the word kill, Mabel was sure it was what she came for. She suddenly lost the strength to keep her hands steady. "We were happy", Diamond rested her back on the chair, "Without him, his attention or care, we were fine. Mom knew he was always going out to meet with you but we were doing fine and if you guys didn't want us when mom died and sent us packing, we would have been fine". " We were wrong, I know", Mabel stuttered, head bowed. "She wanted to grow old, she wanted to stay happy", Diamond choked with tears, "all she wanted was to be a success, a better person to make mom happy, but you shattered it". " I'm sorry, I truly am", Mabel fell to her knees, tears streaming down her eyes. Diamond shut her eyes tight, tears flowing freely through her closed eyes. Her head began to spin at Mabel's words. Her words released the pain she had been trying to hide all these years. She could feel it more than she felt it then. Diamond was only eight and Ruby, six when Susan died of ovarian cancer. Through whatever pain she felt from her illness, whatever hurt Jack caused her, she would always keep up her laughter, trying to prevent her kids from harboring hatred towards Jack. Denying herself of treatment, she used the little she had, fending for her children since jack never cared if they existed. Being children, they never understood the reason behind the stories of the world beyond Susan always talked about 'til she was gone. Only then did the kids realized their father was no man but a beast. A month later, Jack got married to Mabel who hated the children for no reason. At any slight provocation, she would either starve them or beat them up. Hoping to find peace, the kids would climb up a cliff which was a stone throw from their little house, talking about whatever pain they felt and pour out their need for help. Diamond soon took up a job of running errands for the villagers in order to feed themselves when starved. And one night, Diamond and Ruby had both gone up the cliff to pass the time, hungry and out of cash. Mabel had gone after them, wanting to beat them up for not waiting to do the dishes. "I'm sorry, I really am", Ruby cried but Mabel wouldn't listen. In an attempt to protect her sister, Diamond pulled Mabel, releasing Ruby from her grip. Ruby who was standing at the edge of the cliff, tripped and tumbled into the fast flowing river below, not after smashing her head against a rock. Diamond, brokenhearted rushes down the cliff to call for help from the villagers but met Jack on the way. He didn't seem bothered about the situation and vowed to kill her if she spat a word to anyone. Out, into the cold night, he sent her out of the house, away from the village. " Why should I listen to your plea, when you didn't listen to hers?" Diamond got up, eyes reddened. "I know I deserve more pain than just being killed but I need you to forgive me please", Mabel lifted her tears filled eyes. " I would have said to take your plea to paradise, to Ruby for destroying her life, to Susan, for inflicting so much pain on her children ", Diamond pulled out a gun tucked in her pants, " but who knows where you'd be going?" "I can't judge you but I could send you to your judge", She cocked the gun, pointing it Mabel. For a moment, she watched Mabel's fast flowing tears and moving lips. " But I won't, 'cause it's not my place to ", she lifted the gun and shot at Jack' s only picture hanging on the wall. " I hope you find mercy, that's all I've come to say", Diamond turned and walked out of the house, up to the cliff, leaving Mabel in tears. Tears were not enough to express her pain. She had been with the guilt all this time, of playing a part in Ruby's death. Somehow she nurtured that hope in her heart that God will see her, mend her brokenness and take away her pain and bitterness. She fell to her knees and let out a pain filled shout.