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General

(Write a story where the readers are in on a secret that the characters are unaware of.)

The postman fills his small temporary cart with the mail for both sides of the street on this block.  As he drops envelopes and letters into the slots by house number, he vaguely acknowledges what might be inside. A bill or personal or ?  Sometimes he makes up outrageous scenarios based on the outward impression the person of the house has made on him, how annoying, rude or pleasant.  It is a mindless game but amusing.

Bumping along the uneven sidewalk,  it is all very familiar but not really boring now that he plays this mental guessing game.   

He is fairly sure that this letter addressed to Margie Smith from the university is her acceptance.  He knows this girl, she should have no trouble getting her choice of placements.  He also knows she has been waiting to hear from The University so she should be pleased.  Dropping the family mail in the box, he smiles and continues on to the next house and the next.

Margie’s Mom hurriedly picks up the mail on the way to the family room to watch her favorite morning soap opera.  She is pleased it has only begun and she hasn’t missed much,  not that it really matters as they repeat so much.  She begins slipping her finger under the flaps to open each bill and letter.  She is watching a dramatic and tearful exchange between two characters on the soap so she fails to notice she has  opened a letter addressed to Margie  by mistake.

As the commercial comes on the tv, she glances down and sees her mistake.  Pulling the letter out just enough to read …”we are pleased to accept your application for ….”

Smiling as she knows Margie will be delighted, she readjusts the letter in the  envelope and props it up on the mantle for Margie to find.

The news is wonderful,  and like any proud Mother, she immediately calls her two sisters, Margie’s aunts,  to tell them of the good news.  Then she calls three of her best friends from card club to share the news.  As is often the case, if you tell a Mother good news, she becomes the town crier.

When Margie arrives home she is hurrying to shower and go out with friends but her Mother calls to her from the living room.  “Wait darling,  I have some very good news!”

Margie replies, “Oh Mom, you’re such a gossip, I’m sure your news can wait!” And she hurries up the stairs to her bedroom.   Margie is running almost half an hour late so she hurriedly showers, dries her hair all the while grabbing bits and pieces of her life, makeup, cell phone, tablet and pjs and stuffing her backpack for a possible sleepover at Janet’s.  Both have been waiting for their big acceptance letters and both are getting a bit anxious.  Actually Margie is getting more than anxious she is getting depressed.

Margie’s Mother is in the kitchen preparing dinner when Margie calls from the front door.  “Bye Mom,  going to Janet’s,  I may sleep over,  depends on what we get up to tonight.”  With those words the door bangs shut and Margie is off.  

As Margie drives along in her ten year old compact car that everyone calls “Rattletrap” because it in fact rattles, Margie is trying to convince herself that it will be no big deal if she doesn’t get accepted at the University, there are other schools, other jobs, another life in a factory, or maybe she will just have babies, one after another after another...no time for learning anything but to care for her babies.  Obviously her mood is going down the rat trap.

As she rings the bell at Janet’s house the door bursts open and Janet is there waving her acceptance letter!  They hug and dance with arms around each other!  Janet doesn’t see the tears in Margie’s eyes and has no idea Margie has not gotten her letter.

The evening is a drag and Margie is having trouble trying to look happy and pleased for Janet so she decides not to sleepover.  Driving home the tears are flowing, she must pull over to get herself under control before getting home.  

Down the sidewalk comes Mr. Anderson their neighbor to the rear,  He is walking his dog,  a boxer, so most times the dog is walking him.  As they pass Margie, he calls out something but Margie didn’t quite hear him as he was being dragged along as Buster,  the boxer,  spied a rabbit.  He was calling out congratulations as Margie’s Mother had told him the good news over the back fence, but Margie never heard what he was saying.

Finally going in and going quietly up to bed, Margie spends a very restless night.  She is up early and gone from the house thinking a good hard run will drive out the deepening sadness.  Soon she will have to face the facts...no letter...no acceptance...life in a different direction.

At home, Margie’s younger brother Mick is trying to wait patiently for pancakes and bacon for breakfast,  he is lounging around in the living room when he sees the letter.  Seeing it has been opened, he takes the liberty of sliding out the letter.  He sees just enough to know it is the very long awaited letter...Hey, why hasn’t someone told him about this?  

Mick eats a quiet breakfast as he is miffed about not being included in the big family news.  Finishing his meal he goes upstairs.  Instead of going to his small cramped room with the angled ceilings, under the eaves, he goes into Margie’s bedroom.  It is larger by about a third, nice flat ceiling, great view of the backyard,  no morning sun to wake you too early...yes, he is going to like it in this room when Margie leaves for life in a dorm.  He sprawls out on Margie’s bed, pulls a comic book out of his jeans back pocket and lays there thinking how nice it will be to be an only child.

As Margie gets out of Rattletrap and heads into the house she runs into the mailman and he says something very strange to her….something about having a new return address on her letters...but she just waves and goes into the house.  She hears her Mom in the kitchen but goes up to her bedroom.

“What is going on, why are you in my room?” She yells at Mick,  “Get those dirty sneakers off my bedspread!”  “This minute!”

Mick jumps up and yells back,  “well it isn’t going to be YOUR room for much longer!”

Margie’s Mother hears the battle and arrives to instantly understand the situation.

She only says…”Margie go down to the mantle...go now...no discussion!”

And finally Margie got her news !  

Nine people knew it before she did but she was so relieved and happy she couldn’t let these minor details of life ruin her happiness.  

August 15, 2020 19:09

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12 comments

Len Mooring
04:12 Aug 19, 2020

What a tease, and here I was waiting for the chop. It was like the cop shows with him leaving his phone on the desk and missing the call, et cetera. Good work, P. J.

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P. Jean
04:16 Aug 19, 2020

Thank you for thoughts and comments. Comments fuel my fire!

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Pragya Rathore
17:13 Aug 17, 2020

Great story!! I loved the theme, but you have a few punctuation errors in there. has opened- remove the space Margie by mistake-same the envelope-same proud Mother-don't capitalise it card club-add 'the' Mother-don't capitalise it Actually-add a comma Mother-don't capitalise it ten year old-ten-year-old University-don't capitalise it pjs-PJs Obviously-add a comma decides not to sleepover- sleep over long awaited- hyphen to be added great-add 'a' finally-add a comma Then, in the last few lines, keep using the present tense...

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P. Jean
17:42 Aug 17, 2020

Thank you for the super comments. I have always capitalized my Mother, Father ,Grandmother As a form of respect. Others have asked why I put two spaces at the end of sentences? It is because my typing began on a typewriter and we were taught that way, I love the fun of imaginings the stories but the “housekeeping” is killing me. Thanks for reading and commenting.

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Pragya Rathore
17:44 Aug 17, 2020

Oh! I'm so sorry, I mistook them for typos. I admire your values, and it was merely a suggestion. I hope you didn't mind! Once again, fabulous story! :) Please check out my stories too :p

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P. Jean
17:44 Aug 17, 2020

My favorite quote- Vincent Van Gogh - Love many things, for therein lies the true strength, and whosoever loves much performs much, and can accomplish much, and what is done in love is done well.

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Twylla Johnson
22:02 Aug 26, 2020

Communications issues can be so upsetting! Very nice story.

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P. Jean
22:16 Aug 26, 2020

Thanks for taking the time to comment. Appreciate!

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15:32 Aug 22, 2020

Great story P. Jean! I like how it draws you in with it's fast-paced delivery. I couldn't wait until Margie got the news!

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P. Jean
15:33 Aug 22, 2020

Thank you charm for commenting. I appreciate your time and enthusiasm!

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P. Jean
20:45 Aug 15, 2020

Another weak ending! I need to try harder to find a punch or a ??? Something that isn’t so lame in my endings!

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The Cold Ice
14:51 Aug 27, 2020

Great story👍keep it up.I loved the story. Would you mind to read my story “The dragon warrior?”

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