The Pranksta#5803

I hate pranks.

I hate anything to do with laughter. 

I hate fun.

And I hate April fools’ day.

This is precisely why my plans to avoid being pranked on April 1st were going to come alive in exactly 10 hours, 11 minutes and 4 seconds. It is time for April fools-less day to arrive. 

I didn’t go to school or anywhere today, I spent the whole day planning for tomorrow, April 1st, April fools’ day. Last year, my friends had pranked me by putting Charlie’s pet rat in my school bag. The year before that, they mixed worms with my spaghetti. But the worst thing they had ever done was when they spattered honey all over the toilet seat. That was the last straw. And so I lie here now in my bed, adding the final touches to my revenge; 

The Pranksta#5803.

The Pranksta#5803 consisted of a cheese burger, (cause why not!?) a cherry, (to top things off!) And a heavy metal axe. It was specifically a heavy metal axe because the axe played heavy metal music, because again, why not? And this is how it worked:

How The Pranksta#5803 would work:

1. Bribe everyone with cheeseburgers
2. While the victims are dancing to the heavy metal music, Cut their hands of with the heavy metal axe so that they cannot prank anyone ever again
3. Place a cherry ontop of their heads to top it all off

That is how The Pranksta#5803 will run tomorrow for April fools day. 

Feel intimidated…!!!!

This is all the work of a genius.

The next day… 

I woke up the next morning with a gleeful smile on my face. Today was the day to end all pranks! (Quite literally.) I arose from my bed and kicked my legs out in front of me. I stretched out my fingers and rolled my head around and side to side. Finally, I was ready to meet The Pranksta#5803. I carefully pulled back my blinds and ran my hands over my design. The Pranksta#5803 was only three inches tall and five inches across. It was rather small, but a perfect size to keep hidden in my pocket until I was ready to unleash my weapon. I had to make it small for two reasons:

1. So I could disguise it at school
2. To keep it hidden from Mum.

It was simple. I would simply put it in my pocket until it was time to get my revenge, and then unleash it in the corridor and then stand back and watch what happened. I pulled on my uniform and combed my hair to the side. This was the moment I’d been waiting for all year. 

Little did I know that I was completely, and utterly wrong…