I Love My Bird, I Really Do

I love my bird, I really do. However, now that I have been spending my time working from home, she seems to think play time is all the time. It is hard to do a conference call when your bird is mocking your boss every time he speaks. Or it is impossible to print something because as soon as the printer stops she plucks up the paper in between her beak and shreds it. She does not understand that I have to work from home and I cannot entertain her all the time. She loves to be a distraction and it is hard not to be distracted by her. Here's the deal. She used to be my grandmother's bird, but when she passed, no one in the family wanted to take her, so I did because I know how much my grandmother loved Becky. I am still getting used to Becky and she is still getting used to me, and I love her. She is a little companion and someone to talk to if I get lonely. However, I have only had Becky a couple months and I have never had to spend this much time with her. Usually I would work every weekday, and on the weekends I would go out with friends. This is the longest we have been together and it has been a trip let me tell you that. 

It all started the first week I was home from work. Due to the conditions of the world, we were ordered to work from home. I was so excited, who wouldn't be. I could sleep in, not worry about traffic, and I didn't have to pack a pathetic lunch that I would choose to throw away on my lunch break to go get fast food. On the first morning that I could sleep in my bird, Becky, decided that she needed to replace the alarm clock I turned off the night before. So she squawked for half an hour while I yelled back. The moment I got up she completely stopped. It was absolutely ridiculous. I tried to sleep again the next day. That was the last day I tried to sleep in. Becky clearly likes a scheduled day and I was not on schedule if I was sleeping in. 

At the end of each week the entire accounting department is supposed to meet and communicate about the week, and our work. My boss, who is the head of the department, heads the meeting, which starts at 12 o’clock sharp. I was logging in at 11:58 so I could be on time but not early. That is when Becky started shrieking from her cage and trying to fly inside of it, effectively rocking the cage and making a lot of loud clanging noises. So I let Becky out. Usually when I let her out she flies to her perch on the opposite side of the room and cleans out her feathers.  This time she waited until I was entered into the conference call to perch herself on my shoulder. I immediately apologized but my boss didn’t mind, saying that we are all adjusting to working from home. I am sure he didn't mind, well, until Becky started to mock every single word after that. I was completely embarrassed but my coworkers thought it was hilarious, and my boss did too the first couple of times. Eventually I just stopped my audio feed which meant that I could not speak nor give any input to the conversation I just had to listen to. Meanwhile, Becky squawked away after my boss each time he spoke, even though he could no longer hear her. It seems Becky does not like conference calls.

While I was doing some paperwork, Becky decided that it was time to sing. I don’t know if you have ever tried to concentrate really hard on work while listening to music, but you end up writing the words to the song instead of your work, but, that is what I did for 12 pages of paperwork. It would've been fine if i noticed after the first page but I noticed when I was going onto page 13 that I had random lyrics in the middle of my work. I had to redo it two more times because I had to do it in pen, and I am out of white out. Which would be fine if I could leave my house to go get some, but it is nonessential, so I am stuck here. She liked to distract me from my work and I do not know why. At first I thought she wanted some attention and that she might have thought I was ignoring her. So I tried to play with her, but she did not want to play, which was made obvious when she pecked me. The thought of her wanting to play was quickly crossed out of my mind when blood started to drip from my finger. She has a nasty bite let me tell you. 

The most recent of the incidents came with the help of my printer. It seems Becky has a vendetta against it because she likes to peck at it and shred my work as it comes out of the printer. I have had to keep her locked in her cage while I print. The first time I printed I learned my lesson. I was sitting at my desk chair and my page had just finished printing. I decided to let it sit there for a moment while I save the document to my computer. That was when Becky swooped in from her perch across the room and shredded my brand new paper. I was shocked. I had never seen Becky so worked up. I was picking up shredded pieces of paper from around the room for an hour. An hour! She has been distracting me from my work every single day. 

I love my bird. I really do. She is such a sweetheart and has kept me company even though all the random issues we have encountered working from home. I think she feels like I have encroached on her territory a little bit. Usually she has 6 hours a day, 5 day a week to her lonesome, and now she has to share our time. I have thought of getting her a friend before but I tried that once too, and it didn't work. She likes her alone time and I am clearly taking that from her considering I cannot leave the house. 

I made a breakthrough on a Saturday so it was my day off. I was exhausted from working with Becky these past couple of weeks when a light bulb went off above my head. It was an odd idea but it was worth a shot. I tried to think of my grandmother and do what she did. Becky seemed to like a schedule so maybe she wanted me to do what my grandmother did. My grandmother did a list of things in one day. She homemade all three of her meals, she knitted until her fingers hurt, she colored in a coloring book, and would read, all the while she loved to play classical music. I came up with this idea after breakfast so I made myself lunch and Becky perched on my shoulder while I ate, as quiet as a mouse. I played classical music all day long, and while at first I found it annoying after some time it was soothing. Becky really liked when the classical music came on. I could not knit, nor did I have any coloring books, so I decided to try and do some of my work for next week on a Saturday. It was a miracle I tell you. Becky was then fine with the loud printer, and me sitting at my desk. 

The following Friday, when my conference meeting came around, and after a whole week of classical music, Becky was fine. I played it lightly in the background of my video, just enough for Becky to hear it but not loud enough from the participants of the conference calls to hear it. It seemed like it was all coming together. Becky and I just needed to get used to each other. Plus, I actually enjoy classical music now. I think Becky misses my grandmother, but I think the classical music reminds Becky of her and fills the sadness in her heart.  Becky and I have learned to live together, which is great because I don't know how much longer I have to work from home.