Tug of War

Ava was sitting near the ocean under her umbrella sipping her fresh brewed coffee. She was not facing the ocean but facing her beach house.

The house she had always wanted.

A house that her and Bradley bought right after they got married, he was an avid surfer and swimmer in his free time. He loved the ocean.

Ava would go to the beach and sit by the ocean when she needed to think or make big life altering decisions.

It brought both joy and peace to the couple.

The house was beautiful. It has hues of blues, pinks and greens. Her favorite room had a giant oversized fireplace for those cold nights.

They came here often; this was their haven.

They met by chance at a friend’s house. They were both grabbing appetizers from the table and caught each other’s attention. Their eyes locked and there was an instant attraction.

From that moment they were inseparable. They both had relationships before, but this one was like no other. 

He came from money and worked at his family’s company, and she worked in an ad agency but was moving her way to the top.

They both dreamed big and aspired to be better, but better together.

There weren’t enough words to describe the way he felt for her and the way she felt for him.

Bradley came from generational wealth, and she came from humble beginnings. She worked her way up and continued to work her way up in her career.

His family had high expectations for him in every way including in the woman that he would eventually marry, but when they met Ava, they instantly fell in love with her warmth and charm. They liked that she worked her way up and didn’t look for handouts.

This acceptance made it easier for them to build their relationship.

The passion between them was undeniable. They loved each other, lusted for each other and could talk about anything together.

She felt fulfilled and adored like never before. She did not know this kind of love could exist. 

They traveled frequently and after a couple of years and then they decided to start a family. 

They both couldn’t wait to be parents, and she was lucky enough to conceive the first month of trying.

Their first child a boy, the heir to the throne. Then a couple of years later a second child was born, a daughter. 

They had one of each and during this time, she stepped back from work and became a full-time mother and there were no regrets.

He was loving and involved with his children. He was a doting father.

Their love never wavered and still made time for each other every night after the chaos of putting two children to bed.

Every relationship should be like theirs. Their story and their love were what books were made of.

Ava woke up and she looked around and was distraught.

Was I dreaming?

It felt so real. She closed her eyes and thought she was stuck in a nightmare. 

She looked over again and saw Ben. He was familiar, she once loved him. She thought that this dream was crazy. Why would she be dreaming about Ben an old love when she had the perfect man in Bradley.

Ben was there and he was in a sound sleep.

They broke up years ago, they lost their connection. They lost their passion. They lost each other.

She was stuck in this dream. When Ben left for work, she looked around for any piece of Bradley she could find and there was nothing to be found.

Did he exist? Am I losing my mind? She began crying.

Then what felt like an eternity this life with Ben became normal.

She was with Ben because she didn’t know how to leave. She stayed for the kids. She stayed with him out of comfort.

These ideas she put into her head frequently.

She felt broken. Her dream and her life with Bradley felt so real. He came into her life often and at times she thought that was her real life and that Ben was the dream. 

That dream was to keep her grateful for the perfect life she had with Bradley.

As the days turned into nights, and the days into weeks and the weeks into months, Bradley did not come back to her.

She became depressed and wanted to sleep more than remain awake for the hope that she would go back to her “real” life.

Then a few months later, Bradley and their perfect life reappeared.

She asked, why did you leave me?

He replied, I am not sure what you are talking about? I just went to work, I let you sleep in today since the kids were with my parents.

She was so confused.

Both relationships felt so real, and she could not figure out what was going on. 

She would go back and forth into both relationships to only feel frustration. 

Months passed.

She shared a beautiful trip with Bradley to Mexico, just the two of them. It brought her so much joy. 

When they got home, she went to sleep and woke up next to Ben. 

She never saw Bradley again.

She was devastated by the loss. She thought Bradley was her real life. She now realized that was the life she was manifesting in her dreams.

She wrote him a note in her diary.

I had a dream of you

To wake up and realize

You weren’t real

You were loving,

Kind and compassionate,

You weren’t real.

You were what I had always wanted,

You weren’t real.

I go through the days and nights longing for you,

But you were…. just a dream.

You are not real.

You are not even anywhere within my reach,

You are a star in the sky,

Not an attainable reality.

You were just a dream.

Now my heart breaks due to the absence of you.

For the reality of life has cheated me.

Why a dream of you?

With that she put Bradley to rest, but she mourned him as if he had died.

She decided to leave her husband in hopes of finding her real-life Bradley.