No Choice

I align my arrow with its target and pull back the string of the bow.

If only Astro knew.

If only he knew how much this decision hurt me.

But I had no other choice. I don't want to die, true love or not. I'm a coward. I don't understand what he sees in me.

Yet here I am, hesitating.

Maybe I should just turn around and go back to the castle. Or perhaps I should just speak to him and ask him for help with my troubles.

That won't do me any good though, would it?

I take a deep breath and steady my hands, which have been shaking throughout this whole internal conflict.

Just let go. Take the shot.

And I do.

The arrow whooshes through the trees and hits its target, who falters and then drops to the ground with a small cry.

No….

Why did I do that?

But do I really have the guts to take it back?

Of course not. Again, I'm a coward.

I drop my bow and push my way through the trees and towards where the arrow landed, my heart pounding in my ears and my breaths trembling through my lips.

I drop to my knees beside the fallen figure, mumbling to myself, “No, no, no, no, what have I done? No, no…”

“Please…help me…” he chokes out, his voice hoarse and weak, face contorted in pain.

“I can't, Your Majesty. You must understand. I can't let her kill me or your son. It pains me, really,” I try to reassure him but my voice sounds unsure even to me.

I take one of his hands, which is bloody from pressing against the wound. The arrow lay on the ground. I presume he pulled it out in an attempt to save himself.

“Please…” he murmurs again, his voice sounding raspier by the second.

I shake my head lightly and stand up, dropping his hand and taking a small step back.

I need to get back to Astro. I need to make sure the queen doesn't harm him.

My vision blurs through tears as I turn my back on the man who was supposed to be my future father-in-law.

“Monster…” he whispers before falling silent.

I wish I wasn't one.

But it's inevitable. I already am.

I make my way through the forest back the way I came, picking up my bow along the way and hardening my expression. If she wants me to become a monster to live with my true love, then a monster I shall be.

I'm not letting anything bad happen to Astro, even if that includes killing his father.

That's already done. I'm not scared of what's next.

~~~

“Darling, why did my father never return from the market? And where have you been?” asks Astro as I barge into our chambers in my castle.

I freeze, looking at him with concealed emotions. I'm debating whether to tell him.

He can sense something is wrong and he approaches me to take my hands in his. My vulnerability takes over as I look into those soft, caring brown eyes.

“I killed him.”

I bite my lip as soon as I say the words, wishing I could take them back again. Take back the pain I've caused his father and him. But I can't.

The damage is done.

His eyes gradually darken at the statement and he steps back, dropping my hands in the process. He looks at me now like he doesn't know me, like I'm a stranger.

“You what?” he whispers in disbelief.

“I killed him,” I say, this time more indifferently, more detached. I unfreeze and set my bow and arrows down on my desk and pull out my hair tie, letting my hair fall over my shoulders.

“Why?” he demands, his strict voice bringing tears to my eyes once more.

“The Queen threatened me. She said if I didn't get rid of your father, it would either be you or me taking his place. I didn't have a choice,” I explain carefully, my hands shaking again as I reach for a glass of water that is sitting on the bedside table.

He intersects my hand and tries to steady it. “Darling, Alma, you needn't worry about my mother. I promise I'd never let her do anything bad to you or I. You mustn't give in,” he exclaims quietly, his voice filled with concern and a hint of confusion.

“You weren't there when she told me. You don't know what she's truly like,” I argue persistently, pulling my hand away from his. He wouldn't understand.

How is he being so patient and kind? I just murdered one of his relatives.

He opens his mouth to counter but is interrupted by one of the servants opening the door quietly.

“The Queen asked to see you,” he mumbles meekly, his head bowed.

I immediately head towards and out the door, past both Astro and the servant.

This is not good. What does she have planned next? I can't keep this up much longer and once it drops, we'll be left with nothing.

Astro follows and we make our way towards the Throne Room. Pushing open the door, I freeze in my tracks. The Queen is standing in the center of the room holding a child's arm.

My sister's child.

No, no, no. She can't expect me to…There's no way in this whole world that I could ever possibly…

“Ah, Alma. Thank you for the deed you have done. It's opened up much possibility for me. Now that the king is out of the way, I am able to take over as the ruler of this kingdom,” the queen says with great glee, a huge twisted smile on her face, eyes beaming with satisfaction.

“Mother, what is the meaning of this?” Astro asks strictly, his face showing obvious concern for the child. He slowly steps closer, one hand edged to his sword.

“Sorry, son, but I must make sure everyone knows they're place now that the king is gone,” the queen states directly. Then she turns to me and shoves the girl towards me.

I stumble back slightly as I catch her, before quickly letting her go and stepping back.

“You know what to do. Prove your loyalty,” commands the queen. She snaps her finger and my bow and arrows materialize in my hands.

I glance at Astro, who gives me a worried look. Perhaps telling me not to.

But what else can I do? I'm selfish. I need Astro. I need myself. I…

I need to be brave.

If I take the shot, Astro will never forgive me and I would lose him anyways. I can't take that risk. Plus, it's just a child. I can't do that to my sister and her kid.

I back away to the wall and raise my bow, holding it tightly and aiming towards the child.

Last chance to change my mind…

I turn and let go of the arrow, sending it directly towards the queen and hitting her heart, just like with the king.

“NO!” she shouts, hand reaching to it uselessly as she falls and eventually lays motionless.

Astro stands frozen with shock. Then he grabs the arrow and bow and throws them to the ground to the side, tears falling from his eyes.

“That's both parents in one day?! What the hell is wrong with you?” he half yells, half sobs, slamming a weak fist into my shoulder before leaning against me.

I stay silent, knowing that speaking would only make this moment worse.

“I'm an orphan now, I suppose. And king. But what good does it do if I'm with the woman who made me both?” he speaks to himself.

“It had to be done. I wish I could take back what I did to your father, but without your mother gone, we'd all be dead. There would be no kingdom,” I try to comfort him while also trying to reassure myself. “You're an orphan, but…but you're also the king now. Please forgive me,” I beg Astro pleadingly, determined to keep the love of my life.

“I could never not. You're the only one I have. I need you. Especially now because of this,” he responds, wiping his eyes and looking at me.

The look in his eyes breaks my heart yet brings a soft smile to my face at the same time. I'm lucky I have him.

“I'm sorry,” I whisper before he closes the distance to comfort both of us with the kiss that brings magic to our world.