Over Text

March 25, 2020

9:00am

Harry: Hey, you awake?

Me: Just got up.

Harry: I think we need to talk.

Me: I figured.

Harry: But I don’t think it can wait until I come down again.

Me: Right.

Harry: Please don’t be mad.

Me: Who said I was mad?

Harry: We’ve been dating for three years; I think I can read you over text pretty well. And you’re mad.

Me: Okay. So what am I apparently mad about?

Harry: At me, for one. That this is happening over text, for another.

Me: Then don’t do this over text and look at that; I’m not mad anymore.

Harry: Babe…

Me: Well. If you’re going to do it than just do it.

Harry: You know I love you, right?

Me: If you loved me, YOU WOULDN’T BE BREAKING UP WITH ME OVER A TEXT DURING A GLOBAL PANDEMIC.

Harry: I can’t wait until this blows over, we don’t know how long that will be. I can’t do that to you.

Me: Do what? Let me stupidly believe that my boyfriend is still in love with me, when he’s actually just waiting to break up with me in person? Yes, how cruel.

Harry: I haven’t been able to sleep lately. This has been eating me up.

Me: Oh, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry that you haven’t been getting a full 8 hours as you’ve been trying to figure out how to break up with me.

Harry: Please don’t do this.

Me: Do what?? React? Harry, you just said it; we’ve been dating for three years. God forbid I have a reaction to that ending.

Harry: I wish I was there. To hold you.

Me: Stop.

Harry: This isn’t how I imagined things ending.

Me: You know, me either. I didn’t imagine things ending at all. Guess we were both wrong.

9:30am

Me: So, that’s it? That’s all you have to say to me?

Harry: Dammit, Bridgette. There’s so much I want to say. I just don’t know what good it will do.

Me: Humor me.

Harry: This hurts so much cause I still love you.

Me: Our idea of being in love must be different then. Because I love you, yet I was never planning on ending things.

Harry: But I don’t think it’s enough.

Me: What? Me? I’m not enough?

Harry: I think us loving each other isn’t enough.

Harry: Please say something.

Me: I just. I’m trying to figure out when I suddenly wasn’t enough for you. When my love for you just became another mundane part of your life. Something that you could just throw away when it finished serving its purpose.

Harry: Will you please pick up? We can at least talk over the phone.

Me: Why? Will hearing my voice suddenly change your mind? I don’t think it will.

Harry: Bridge…

Me: Is there someone else?

Harry: No. No one.

Me: I guess it doesn’t matter if there is.

Harry: I never cheated on you. I swear to God.

Me: What was it then? There had to be a turning point, where you woke up one morning and decided to be done with it. With us.

Harry: I don’t know.

Me: Bullshit.

Harry: I don’t. Maybe it was a lot of moments. The time. The distance. The pandemic.

Me: It’s only been two months; and I sincerely hope you’re not blaming miles and a virus for why you’re breaking up with me.

Harry: I’m not saying that. I just think it got me thinking.

Me: About?

Harry: Bridge, we don’t have to do this.

Me: No, I think we do.

Harry: I didn’t miss you, okay?

Harry: We live 2000 miles away from each other, and I didn’t actively miss being around you. Once people started getting sick up here, I didn’t even think to move home to ride it out. To be with you. It’s not because I didn’t love you, I just didn’t worry about you.

Harry: I should have been worrying about you, Bridge. Don’t you think it’s a little messed up that I was okay to be so far away from you during all of this? That I was okay with you being alone?

10:30am

Harry: Shit. I shouldn’t have said that.

Me: It’s fine. I asked.

Harry: And?

Me: And nothing. That’s more truth than you would have given me had you dumped me in person.

Harry: I’m sorry.

Me: So am I.

Harry: I’ll come pick up the stuff I have at your place next time I come down.

Me: Don’t. I’ll box it up and bring it to your moms.

Harry: That would be nice, she’d love to see you.

Me: Well, that makes one person.

Harry: I said I was sorry. I knew I shouldn’t have said anything.

Me: Don’t worry, Harry. This can be over now. We can be over now. That’s what you’ve been looking forward to, right?

Harry: Bridgette…

Me: If you say you still love me, I swear to God.

Harry: I do, though.

Me: But that’s the thing. You just said our love wasn’t enough. Whatever remaining love you have for me doesn’t absolve you from breaking my heart.

Me: So you know, let’s really be done. I don’t want any more reasons or justifications. Please don’t text me back. I need to go be enough, for myself. Bye, Harry.

3:00pm

Harry: I just heard about your Grandpa. I’m sorry.

Me: Thanks.

Harry: If you need to talk, I’m here.

Me: You’re actually not, so I’m good.

Harry: Was just trying to be nice.

Me: No, Harry. You’re trying to come out of this as the good guy. But I’m going to need more than 5 hours to feel any warm feelings towards you again.

Harry: I never stopped being the good guy, Bridge. It’s just the way you see me that’s changed.

Me: Right.

Harry: Just because we broke up doesn’t mean I’m some villain. I still care about you. I always will.

April 13, 2020

5:00pm

Me: Congrats.

Harry: Sorry?

Me: Your mom was just telling me that your girlfriend is expecting.

Harry: Bridge, I can explain.

Me: She’s what? Two months along?

Harry: Will you please answer the phone?

Me: We don’t need to talk. You don’t owe me any explanation. I don’t know why I even texted you. Maybe because I genuinely believe you when you told me there was no one else.

Harry: Bridgette, please answer the phone.

Me: Go have a nice life, Harry.

Harry: I really need to explain.

Me: You don’t, though. But remember a few weeks ago when you said you weren’t the bad guy?

Harry: Yeah.

Me: Congratulations. You just become one. Screw you.

*Are you sure you want to block Harry Daniels?*

*This contact has been blocked.*

6:30pm

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