A lost last hope

On 31^st December, the old man, Dean, woke up at 11:00 am.  Rubbing his old dense gray beard and in slow short steps, he went toward the bathroom in his shack. On his way going to his humble bathroom, he saw himself in an old broken mirror, and then he stopped. He watched his face and realized how the time and things that happened in the old days made him. He stood for about half an hour before the mirror thinking of everything. Then he goes to the bathroom. Dean was short and chubby; he had long hair and a rounded miserable face. He had also blue eyes and they were beautiful.

He got out of his shack with a shovel in his right hand; he barely could open the door. The snow was covering everything and it was the New Year eve, so he started to shovel the snow before his door. The cold breeze got him shaking and from time to time the snow got into his boots. He tried as fast as he can to finish the shoveling so he can go back into his shack and light the fire to warm his freezing legs.

He got in and took some rods from the pile of wood and poured some fuel on them because he can’t wait. So he lit the fire and took a chair and placed it in front of the fire and sat. He took off his boots and his socks and felt his legs getting warm slowly. He felt good in the shack. ‘But I need some food for the next two weeks; they said in the radio that there’s a storm starting from tomorrow. Gee, I wish my daughter was here with me to support, I really miss her. She didn’t send me a letter this year. I wonder how she is now.’ He thought. ‘Well I’d better go out and find some food. It gets dark early in the winter.’ He said. He put on his boots and took with him the lighter, a knife, some crackers, and money to buy food and have a ride home and spend one night. ‘I think these things are enough…. Oh! I have to take the photo with me; at least if I die on the way, I would like to be watching my two dearest.’ He said. The picture showed his wife and his daughter when he was 45 years old and now he’s 65. He left the shack and he had an hour and a half to get to the village where he can buy food and meet other people.

He went through the snow and through the woods singing ‘oh god. In the sky… tell her that I miss her… her death made me cry… tell me when I can see her.’ He kept singing all the way till he saw a group of wolfs, they were far from him. ‘if you want to eat me I’m here.’ He said loudly. ‘I’m tired of waiting for death to take me where I can see my beautiful wife. Here I am, an old man unable to climb the trees or to run away from a certain death. What are you waiting for?’ Then he laughed. He kept looking if the wolfs gave him attention but they were playing and jumping, they had nothing to do with the old man. Then he walked away. He was so desperate and lonely. ‘Singing and talking to yourself won’t make any difference.’ He said. ‘You are a lonely man, Dean.’ He walked a little further and said ‘anyway singing is better than doing nothing.’ And he sang all the way down to the village ‘oh god in the heavens… I want to see my bride… all my bones and heart are broken… I lost my love and my pride.’

He arrived to the village. He got his watch out of his pocket ‘it’s 2:00 pm. I have to hurry and buy my stuff.’ He said. He walked on the sidewalk and two men saw him walking. One of them said’ who is this man? I’ve never seen him before.’

‘He’s uncle Dean. He rarely comes to the village.’

‘It’s too cold for him to walk outside. Did he come to celebrate the New Year?’ He said.

‘Certainly, he’s not here to celebrate. It’s been 20 years ago he didn’t celebrate the New Year.’

‘Oh! Why, sheriff?’ he said.

‘He was living here in this village before you were born. He had a wife and a beautiful daughter. He loved his wife more than any person. And once he was celebrating the New Year, he brought the biggest fireworks in the village. He was trying to please his wife, because she was fascinated with fireworks. And when it was 11:59 pm he gave here the lighter to light the fuse and then by accident the fireworks exploded on his wife and injured her in her head. I and he tried to find help and everybody was shocked. The ambulance came in 5 minutes; we took her to the hospital and stayed in there all night. But in the end god wanted to take her to heaven. She passed away, and since then he never celebrated the New Year.’

‘And what about his daughter?’ he said.

'What about his daughter?' He said.

'I told my wife to keep her with my kids; she was 15 years old then.' The sheriff said.

'Is she living with him now?' He said.

'No, kid. She left to Paris with her husband. From time to time i used to send him some letters with a sum of money having her name on it, so that he doesn’t feel lonely on New Year eves.' The sheriff said.

'So you lied at him just not to make him feel lonely?' He said.

'Yes, and I’m sorry for that. This year he didn't get any letter as I know.' The sheriff said. ‘she married young, she was 21 years old when she married. Since then, he had never seen her again.’

‘It’s sad to see such a struggle, sheriff.’ The boy said.

‘Yeah, it’s definitely a sorrow life story.’ The sheriff said.

The old man, dean, walked in to a bar. He opens the door and the old bartender smiled and called ‘Hey old man. Finally, you made your way here, congratulations.’ The old man smiled and went directly to the bartender. ‘You didn’t change Maury. You still the same old fat trouble boy I knew since I can’t remember.’

‘How are you doing, Dean?’ Maury said.

‘I’m always the same, only the shape changes.’ Dean said.

‘You are spending the night here, right?’ Maury said.

‘No, I’m not. I just needed supplies and some booze, that’s all.’ Dean said.

‘Come on, you really need company, you can’t stay alone for the rest of your life. It’s not easy at least spend one night in my house my wife would like it, and the kids too.’ Maury said.

‘I don’t know, Maury. I lost hope in being happy ever again.’ Dean said. ‘I miss my wife. And my daughter didn’t drop in since she married. She only sends me one letter every year, except for this coming year, I bet she forgot me.’

‘In this case I don’t know.’ Maury said. ‘I won’t lie, it didn’t happen to me to say I feel the same, but I know it’s not good for you to stay alone in somewhere far away from people.’

‘Well, I’ll see. I’ll think of it.’ Dean said.

‘Here, your favorite drink. My homemade beer, I know you like it. Take whatever you want; I’ll pay your bill.’ Maury said.

The old man laughed. ‘You are a bad boy, Maury’ he said loudly. ‘I’m in this age and you’re encouraging me to drink.’ He laughs again and Maury laughs too.

Dean drank and remembered the childhood with Maury. He felt happy then. But, as usual, after a lot of laughter he becomes dark and blue, he drowns in his sad memories and cries from inside. He stopped laughing and sat silent for a moment. Maury knew what’s happening inside Dean. He told him to stay with him till the end of the shift and then leave to Maury’s house together. And for the first time Dean listened to Maury and stayed. He chose a table in the corner and took some beers with him and sat alone. He was looking at the glass and drinking slowly, a glass after another but he was still sober and clearheaded. When Maury’s shift ended at 5:00pm he went and sat with him on the table for a while. Maury drank some beers too. The sheriff and the boy came in to the bar and saw Maury and Dean sitting silent on the table. ‘Here he is, the poor man.’ The boy said. The sheriff didn’t talk he sat on a table and watched them from time to time. ‘Who is that man?’ the boy asked the sheriff.

The sheriff said ’who? That guy who’s sitting with him on the table? He’s Maury, one of his childhood friends, his best friend. He’s the only one who visited him in his shack since he was by himself. They were like brothers when they were young.’

‘What about you and Dean?’ why don’t you go and talk to him?’ the boy asked.

‘It’s been a long time he didn’t talk to me and I don’t really know why. But I feel sorry for him.’ The sheriff answered.

The bar wasn’t noisy but they all could hear people talking and the music wasn’t loud, the pianist was playing slowly. There was no singer only piano music. Suddenly a girl came in and when she opened the door it looked dark outside. The girl was beautiful and well clothed. In that moment Maury and Dean had their heads down. The sheriff and the boy looked at her strangely, as if he knew her before. She went toward the counter and commanded a beer, and it was the same beer Dean took. And as if somebody nudged Maury, he looked at the counter and kind of recognized her. He kept looking at her; he was trying to make sure he knows her. She was drinking at the counter and Maury couldn’t wait, he stood and went toward the counter and sat beside her. He kept silent when he sat he couldn’t ask her he didn’t know how to start the conversation. And then the words came out of his mouth spontaneously. ‘Hey, young lady. Can I ask you?’

She turned her face and recognized him. ‘Uncle Maury! How are you?’ she raised her arms to hug him. And Maury hugged her strongly.

‘It’s been a long time Sarah.’ He said. ‘Where’ve you been?’

‘I’ve been in Paris.’ she said. ‘Where is my father? I come here every year and knock his door every time I come, but he was never there, and in each time I come here I can’t find anyone I know.’

 ‘Oh really?’ he said. ‘He’s somewhere inside the bar.’

She looked left and right and then she found him sitting in the corner, sad. She ran toward him and called ‘Daddy!’ He raises his head and looked at her and finally he smiled from the bottom of his heart.