The One and Only

One and only

I sat down in the chair facing the reception area, grabbed a magazine and waited for the nurse to call me back to the examination room. I wasn't too concerned. I had been here countless times before due to my asthma, but this was just a 6 month checkup so I had made sure to take off the entire day. My supervisor seemed vaguely annoyed but understood.

The waiting room was pretty well packed, with people , crying children and older adults who looked like they really should be in an emergency room rather than a clinic, but everyone knows how expensive that can get. so I knew that it would be a good while before I would be called back. Good thing they provided coffee. I just wished I had brought a book to read as well. Sometimes the magazine articles were dry and uninteresting.

I stared up at the ceiling, looking at the soft inset lighting and then closed my eyes for a time. I was actually pretty good at falling asleep in odd places like doctors offices. Of course,.I had to wake up every so often in case they called my name.

"Hello?"

I woke up a bit and looked around. The guy next to me had his cellphone next to his ear. I decided to go back to sleep or at least try to anyway. The room was still packed. I sighed and repeated the ritual of staring at the ceiling.

"Yeah, I'm....."

"I'm here at the doctor's office "

I hadn't drifted off yet. The guy was trying to talk softly, cupping his hand to his mouth a bit, not that it would do much good.

"I know, I know."

Sigh.... I tried closing my eyes again. Maybe I'll give up sleeping.

"Yeah, I know that it's important! I know it's been planned for months! I can't help this! "

The man started to get up but quickly sat back down for fear of losing his spot to another patient. I had a good look at him. He was dressed in a fancy, but loose-fitting shirt that had a pattern of blue and red triangles all over it. Maybe he was going to a party after his appointment, I thought but judging from this one sided conversation, he is either arguing with his

A. Wife/ Girlfriend 

B. Husband/Boyfriend 

C. Boss.

I wonder which one? I let the drama unfold. I noticed other people noticing the man although they were desperately trying NOT to notice and failing.  I saw a lady in the corner briefly roll her eyes and shake her head and then continued to read a magazine.

They say timing is everything and right now, his seems to be fairly rotten.

"Look it! I set this appointment up in advance for this morning! How was I supposed to know it would be an all day thing? Cut me some slack! My doc is overbooked for the entire year! I'm lucky to even have this appointment. I gotta take it!"

I guessed that whomever was on the other end was going to be the girlfriend/ wife and she was probably saying something like..

"You must love your doctor more than you love me! I work my fingers to the bone and this is the thanks I get?”

I probably have been watching way to many soap operas, it seems.

The strange man's next words were...as follows.....

"You know that's not true, baby! You know your my one and only! Don't be like that!"

I almost snickered at this and I saw another man grin while trying to stifle a laugh by hiding his face behind a magazine. Honestly, if you feel like you have to say something like "you know you're my one and only!", then your relationship is definitely on shaky ground to say the least. The phrase was also very cringe.

Oddly enough, it must have done something because he managed to end the conversation with a smile of sorts. With that drama over, I decided to try to go back to sleep until my name was called.

I was shaken awake by the older guy who was reading the newspaper.

“You looked like you weren't breathin’, sorry.” 

I nodded my head, in thanks and looked around. The waiting room was empty except for the two of us, I was probably next. I turned back to the guy with the newspaper.

“Say, what happened to that guy on the phone from earlier? “

The old man looked towards the seat behind me and snorted a laugh. “Oh yeah,him. The player.”

I gaped.

“The player?”, I repeated.

He looked back at me grinned some more. “Oh…lordy,lordy lordy! Yeah, he comes in here, at Least once a week to con some nurse into goin’ out with him. He sometimes brings them flowers, calls them honey…but in the end, he dumps them and moves on to the next one. Man thinks he's God’s gift to women.”

“Oh wow!”, I wasn't sure whether to be impressed or appalled, but at that point, the nurse had called the old man back and I was left alone for a bit so, I dozed off again.

For some reason, I had this strange dream that I was at a covered bus stop and it was raining then a masked woman in an old fashioned nurses uniform came to me and took me by the hand and led me to something like a brothel where I saw that strange man again who was surrounded by dozens of masked nurses.  

The whole place smelled like tropical flowers and I could hear the sound of a waterfall in the background.

The man called “The Player” sat in something like a wickerwork lounge chair, holding a Mai Tai in his left hand and looked at each one of the masked nurses in turn and said "Your my one and only, baby!"

Then he looked at me and grinned. "You know there's plenty here! I'm willin to share! Come on, Mr. Simpson!"

"Mr. Simpson?'

I felt a touch on my shoulder and I woke up with a start and looked around. I was the last one as usual and 2 hours had passed. I yawned and stretched a bit as the nurse brought me back to the examination room.  

I sat down on the exam table and looked at the nurse. I shook my head and tried to shake the remnants of the dream away.  

"So, I'm the last one, ay?"

The nurse smiled at me and said, "the one and only!"