The Land of Angels

The Land of Angels

The evening was turning crisp and cool. The lights from the traffic below shown like blood vessels of Los Angeles herself. The sound of the dirt below their feet and an LAPD chopper in the distance was the soundtrack to the night. Of course there were others hiking with them, but each party kept their distance. Various beams of light from hiker's flashlights served as beacons to the surrounding wildlife and tenants of the million dollar dwellings of the Hollywood Hills.

Chris turned to his friend and said "Thanks for inviting me for a hike Bobby. I needed this. I've been so stressed with everything." Bobby who was up ahead of Chris stopped and opened her bottle and drank the cool water. "Yeah, I know. You're kind of a dick when you get like that. Anyway, I don't like hiking in the dark by myself. You never know who might be up here." Bobby said.

The trail veered to the left nearing the edge of the ridge facing downtown. There was no denying that LA had an energy found nowhere else. You could have anything you wanted here. Want to be famous? Want to open the newest hot spot? Want to live amongst the gods of entertainment? You can have it all. It was just there as long as you worked your tail off. You could almost touch it. But even closer than those bright lights and just as plentiful was something else. The failure, the doubt and the carcasses of so many people's hopes and dreams. Like the waves crashing onto Venice beach's shores, the churning of lady luck and father time resulting in inevitability for some, chance for others.

"Hey guess who I saw at Art Walk? 'Member Marcus, that big bully guy from school? Yeah, I saw him. He was at the walk with some other dudes. He was bald and fat. Hahah. Remember that guy? Didn't he used to like you?" Chris said chuckling as he held his flashlight to illuminate his next steps.

"Yeah, I remember Marcus. He was an asshole. Did you know that he followed me home for like 3 months during sophomore year. Had a nice car though." Bobby said. "What? What did he drive? I don't remember. Whoa.!" Chris yelled as he lost his footing and almost fell.

"You ok?" She asked "Yeah...almost fell. That would not be good. Show up to my own wedding all bruised and banged up. I don't think I'd hear the end of it." Chris said trying to catch his breath.

"I know right? So are you ready for the big day?" Bobby said walking back to where Chris was. "I think so. Charlie took care of most of the planning anyway, all I have to do is show up."

"Are you ok? Want to keep going or do you gotta get back to civilization?" Bobby said smirking.

"I'm good. So how are things going for you? Are you bringing Rick to the wedding?" Chris said.

"Let's go up to the top right there. I think there is a bench where we can chill." Bobby said. The two kept climbing up the switchbacks making there way through the darkness and the trees. Bobby loved hiking this trail at night. She loved hearing all of the noises that you couldn't hear during the day. The sounds of small animals scurrying around looking for their next meal and the jet planes that keep flying overhead, summoned by LAX.

The trail jutted out in a clearing that faced Universal City and LA proper. A bench covered with graffiti and a solitary trash bin sat silhouetted against the night sky. As they approached an older couple got up from the bench. The older man had trouble getting up had it not been for his wife helping him up. They exchanged polite greetings with Chris and Bobby who now took their place.

"So cute right? Man I hope I end up like them when it's all said and done." Bobby said bringing her legs up and leaning on her knees.

Chris got up and walked out to the edge of the clearing overlooking Los Angeles. The 101's humming was noticeable but if you pretended hard enough it might be a stream or some other natural noise. "He drove a sweet yellow Camaro. But that's all he had going for him. Poor guy." Bobby said after taking another drink from her water bottle.

"Oh yeah. I remember that car. What a douche. So you never answered my question. Are you bringing Rick Saturday? Or are you guys fighting again?" Chris asked and turned back to the city.

"Yeah. About that. I'm not sure I can make it." Bobby said hugging her legs.

"What, what do you mean? Bobby, you've known about the wedding for over a year?" Chris said now facing Bobby.

"Remember when I fell from the swing in 4th grade and knocked my tooth out?" Bobby said without looking up.

"What? Ah. Yeah, kinda. You were dumb and trying to go higher right? What does that have to do with anything? Seriously Bobby, tell me you're joking."

Bobby looked down then up and said "Do you know who helped me up? It was you. I can't believe we've known each other for so long. How much have we seen together? Tons right? The concert aftermath where I ended up in the bushes at your mom's. And when I drove you to your first girlfriend's house because your car was broke down. Good times right?"

"What the heck Roberta, what are you talking about. Yeah, I remember...well some of that. It's been a while." Chris chuckled.

"Those were good times. Why can't we continue making good times?" Bobby asked.

"What are you talking about Bobby? You have a good job, a guy that looks after you and friends, like me."

"Is that all we are Chris? Friends? Why couldn't we be more?" Bobby said slowly looking up at him.

Chris' phone began to ring. "What, hold on a sec...um it's Charlotte. Gimme a sec. Hello? Hey Charlie. What? Wait. Why are you yelling? Do I know what? What time it is? Um..yeah, it's 8 uh twenty six. Why? I don't understand. You're where? How would I...what? Can you please just lower your voice a little bit?" Chris was talking with his hands as much as he was talking into the phone. Charlie's voice was a cacophony of high pitched tones that pierced the night's otherwise naturally subdued symphony.

Bobby stood up and walked to the edge of the clearing. She could see twinkling lights from East L.A. to the other side near Universal Studios. And in front of her stood the downtown LA buildings. Towering over the Angelinos like gods. So many lives intertwined, yet most feeling lonely.

"Charlie, will you calm down. Everything is fine. Listen, I don't know what you're talking about but we can talk about it when I get home. Yes, everything is set for Saturday. Just try to...hello? Hello?" Chris looked at his phone. "I can't believe it. She hung up on me."

"I don't know what the hell's going on." Chris said and walked back and sat down on the bench.

"I need to tell you something Chris. I just don't know how." Bobby said still looking out toward the West. "I should have told you a long time ago but I didn't know how. I was afraid I would ruin our friendship."

"What are you talking about Bobby? Does this have something to do with wedding?"

"You've been so busy lately and I wanted to stop you just for a moment to tell you something. Remember I emailed you like 6 months ago and called in May and you said you didn't have time. Well, the way things are going for me, I needed to take control for a bit. To let you know how I feel."

"Bobby, I don't understand. I'm getting married in less than a week. Listen, I have to go. Charlie is freaking out. She is waiting for me in Marina Del Rey and I don't even know why. So can we start walking back to the lot?" Chris said.

"She's waiting for you because of me." Bobby murmured.

"What?" Chris asked looking up at Bobby.

"Charlotte is waiting for you in Marina Del Rey because I sent her flowers and a card and asked her to meet you there at a restaurant."

"I don't understand Bobby. You told her to meet you there?" Chris asked confusingly.

"No. I wrote the note as though it was from you." Bobby said not turning around.

"Why would you do that? I don't get it." Chris said.

Bobby turned slowly and stepped toward Chris. "I needed to see you. I needed to tell you how I felt once and for all. Chris, we've known each other for ever."

"I know but..." Chris cut her off

"Will you shut up and let me speak? Chris, you've always been there for me. When I've fallen or when I needed help or moved. You were always there for me. Even when my family couldn't take the time. You always did. And when we started dating people years ago I started to look for things in guys that you did for me. Something changed. I started to look for you in other people. I started to see you for what you are. A good man. But I didn't know how to feel or how to explain that to you."

"And now that you are about to get married, I realize that I am losing you. The friend. The person who was always there for me and who I'd kill for. Chris, I can't go to your wedding because I don't want you to marry Charlotte. I want you to be with me. I want you and me to continue this adventure called life that we started so long ago. And this..." Bobby motioned to the vastness of the LA skyline. "This could be ours. We could look after one another and take care of each other like we have been. But maybe this time as a couple?" Bobby stopped two feet in front of Chris.

"Bobby. You know I love you... as a friend. And I can admit that in the past I wondered about us especially when we'd go off to Cancun or Hawaii or Spain and have a grand time. That's hard to do with just anyone. And it's true that we were close, but we never shared a night together. But that was ages ago. And now, on the eve of my wedding you want me to stop my life and just what, let you in and take Charlie's place? And the note to her, what's that about? How should I feel about that?"

"Look Chris, I know it looks bad, but I couldn't get you free and thought that if I could just get her to leave you alone for one night, you'd be game to see me. And look, who was right?" Bobby said now getting closer to Chris.

"Yeah. You were right. I'm here aren't I." Chris said and stepped toward Bobby.

He brought his head to hers and whispered in her ear "It's too late. I wish we would have tried but it's over. I love you Bobby. You were always there for me too. Take care of yourself. Always."

Chris leaned back and began walking down the trail. Other hikers had arrived at the landing where the bench was and began taking photos and laughing and were none the wiser to the heartache that was happening just few feet away.

And in the land of angels, the light of hope dimmed once more.