Sweethearts

It was the last day of my life. I was a little piece on the Candy Land board. Around me were colors I didn’t know existed. I followed the signs along the path haphazardly, gaping at the sweet landmarks.

There was a snowfield with giant candy canes rising out of it. I swung on the red and white stripes and didn’t need to stop and rest. I never really liked peppermint but licked my hands when I was done. I jumped the spaces on the board until I got to the river of fudge. I dipped my toes in first to, naturally, gauge the temperature. Then I squatted at the bank and scooped chocolate into my mouth until my stomach was round and big like a beach ball. I found gumdrops on the other side of the board and got my hands and mouth sticky with sugar crystals. I bounced on top of them and almost reached the sky and the air was so clean and fresh up there at the fringe of the atmosphere. I picked a bouquet of lollipops and strolled through a park where my friends waved and called my name as if I were in a marathon. I tossed lollipops at them which they clambered for. “Hi, Sammy,” my old friend Jeremy called. I hadn’t seen him since we were eleven and he switched schools. I beamed at him with genuine tenderness.

Eventually, I ended up in a sea of frosting where I collapsed and made angels. I could still hear my friends saying my name and their voices were sweeter than all of the candy I had tasted. 

Suddenly, Fiona was there kneeling in the spiral pink frosting. I asked her how she got there, but she only giggled. She had a cookie tin and was pulling chocolate chip cookies out of it that were the size of frisbees. She reached up and swept some cotton candy out of a cloud and handed it to me and I blushed. “Try it,” she said. I tasted it and smiled. We were younger, younger than we were when we met. 

We skipped around the board carelessly. We couldn’t play fair even if we wanted to because there weren’t any cards. We stayed away from the peanut forest because I was allergic and was afraid my throat might swell and I might die. Jawbreakers started raining down from the sky and so we took refuge in a berry bush where we stared at each other and ate berries until our teeth were purple. This was the truest happiness I’d ever experienced.

Fiona really wanted to go to the castle and get an ice cream cone. I led her there once the jawbreaker shower was over and we met the king. Fiona got a strawberry ice cream cone and it had a cherry on it. I got a vanilla one with sprinkles. I wondered if Fiona would make fun of me for getting sprinkles but she didn’t. Instead she poked her finger into the side of it and then wiped the ice cream onto my nose. She laughed and I laughed and the king laughed.

After we’d finished our ice cream, we took a detour through the grass. We came across a swing set with seats made of wafers. So, we swung together for a while, side by side. My heart was beating so fast! I don’t know if it was sugar or love. 

I decided to tell her how I felt. Her eyes, bluer than the sky and blue raspberry, watched me in waiting. How had I done it the first time?

Before I could tell her anything, I got stuck in some bubblegum. I tried to pull my feet out of it but it only crawled up around my ankles like a living organism. I turned my head to face the bright sun. Fiona tried to pull me out of the bubblegum, but she wasn’t strong enough. She apologized to me. I told her it was okay. She put her hands on my face and kissed me. It felt like the first time and was also familiar. I asked her to do it again.

Fiona took my hand and it was warm and soft and I almost thought that maybe her fingers were starting to meld around mine. Her hand felt like taffy, and I wondered with intense suspicion if she was also part of this candy world. I asked her to tell me the truth: was she real? Her face was so close to mine that our noses almost touched. I felt her breath on my lips and it smelled like licorice.

//

Fiona took the chair next to Sammy and held his hand in hers. It was not very warm like a human body is supposed to be. She rubbed spirals in his palm.  

Fearing the coolness of his skin, she pulled the starchy hospital blanket up near his shoulders. A nurse came in behind her, fiddled with his IV and then exited briskly. That was the story of the afternoon.

They’d gone to high school together some years ago. Now, she was living in a different part of the country. She couldn’t decide if she regretted moving so far away, but it was something she thought about often. They had dated a little after graduation, but she would insist that it had never been anything serious. He still called her from time to time and she still answered though they never had much to talk about.

He’d been in a coma for about a week. A machine was making him breathe because he couldn’t do it on his own. She leaned in close to him like she was going to kiss him though she couldn’t because of the tube in his mouth. She wondered if he could feel her breath on his nose. 

“I love you,” she murmured. And somewhere in the candy world in his brain, they were embracing and his body was warm and he was taking deep breaths.